Konfuzion Posted September 27, 2008 Posted September 27, 2008 I am gonna try to keep this short. My ex and I live together and she is out of the state for 2 weeks, we had agreed to maintain NC while she was gone unless there was something important to talk about. Well she keeps finding little important reasons to call me and the last time she called she was telling me that she misses me but that she knows the breakup is the best idea, but that she feels like someone has died. Also in our last conversation she said I am going to call you later to get the receipts from you so I can balance the check book, I was like "ok". And then when I got off the phone I though you just created another opening to call me again. So I e-mailed her with all the receipts and said "there now you don't need to call me, please don't call unless its important". Should I just ignore all calls from her and then check my voice mail to see if it was important? What should I do?!?!?
Author Konfuzion Posted September 27, 2008 Author Posted September 27, 2008 Common Caliguy... someone help
CaliGuy Posted September 27, 2008 Posted September 27, 2008 Don't TELL her you are creating space. DO IT. Don't answer her calls. Go HAVE FUN. Hang out with friends, go work out, go for a bike ride or hang at the park, etc. Occupy your time so you're not sitting there contemplating when she is going to call next. Check your VM if you wish but RESIST the urge to call her, email her, etc. If she's the one to call it off and you want NC then you are the one who has to implement it.
GrenEydLdy7 Posted September 27, 2008 Posted September 27, 2008 It sounds like she isn't so sure a break up is for the best. Especially if she is calling just to say she misses you. Maybe you two haven't fully discussed the break up or resolved things to the point of making that decision. I would say to her you understand she misses you and wanting to keep contact but that you had agreed on no contact while she was away and let her know, you won't be answering her calls or text messages unless it is truly important. See how she handles that and go from there. I have posted a request myself, maybe you would have some advice for me? The post is "Afraid to break up but afraid not to"
Geishawhelk Posted September 27, 2008 Posted September 27, 2008 GrenEydLdy7, you're posting from a position of 'wishful thinking'. In my experience, if people are establishing NC, that's exactly what they mean, because that's how far down the road they are. It's not about not communicating, it's about not letting go when you should. When you know darned well everything is over. But you just won't accept it. See my response to you in your thread.
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