How to approach a chick I like

[alphamale]

"Hey, can I have your number?"

actually i prefer "Can I give you a call sometime??"

[Isolde]

Like I said earlier, it's just good practice, sharpening the saw. I don't necessarily want the number, but it's easier to be in the habit of getting it for when someone I actually want to ask out comes along. It's just like shooting free throws or playing guitar, the more you do it, the better you get. And since it's not hurting anyone, it's all good. Since men are the ones expected to do the asking out, it's only fair that we get some reps in!

 

I personally think feigning interest isnt really the best way to learn how to deal with people you actually do like because the whole feeling would be different anyways. Asking for a number signifies some level of interest--it's one thing not to call but another thing to HAVE NO INTENTION OF CALLING. But to each his own I guess.

[Isolde]

actually i prefer "Can I give you a call sometime??"

 

Yeah, that works too, I was just trying to impress upon the OP that a simple and direct line will do it.

[one goal]

today totally sucked, bad luck. First my class before the class with the cute girl I like, the teacher let us out almost 10 mins late! So I wasn't able to get to the next class early to talk to the girl if I saw her. It probably wouldn't matter anyways because she was almost 10 minutes late to class, so I wouldn't have been able to talk to her anyways. My first hour class, this girl happens to have class across the hall from me. I noticed she was late to first hour also. It makes me go hmmm. I'm thinking she might have a boyfriend because last week before I talke to her she was talking with this other guy alot, befor class, really big guy. Also she texts alot too, I wonder if she could be late to class cause of a bf? I mean I'd have to be careful then because he could beat my A**, and my little 5-9 self wouldnt stan a chance

I was going to talk to her after class, but she was in a conversation with another student, then was talking to the teacher about stuff. She looked like she had a cold or something today and in a b*tchy mood most likely. The hotter chick in class though looked really cute!! I was going to tell her,her hair looked really cute or something, just subtle flirting, but she left the class before me. Sucks cause if I didnt get out of first hour class late, I probably would have saw her.

 

I'm just P*ssed because I had everything planned out and that, then I dont get a chance to talk to her. It's like everything is against me to find a girlfriend. It seems school sucks, and is not a good place to talk to girls. I'm tired of it

[one goal]

Should I take one of my xanaxs before I go to class maybe?

[Isolde]

I'm not sure why you think telling girls how cute they look is going to be effective. We love to be complimented, but if a guy we've never or rarely spoken to before tells us, "Your hair looks pretty today, did you crimp it?" it's a little weird to say the least.

 

Are you sure you're not a troll?! If not, you seriously need to get some therapy because this anxiety is going to cut into other aspects of your life too. Unless you're like 15, in which case, I guess it would be understandable.

[one goal]

I'm not sure why you think telling girls how cute they look is going to be effective. We love to be complimented, but if a guy we've never or rarely spoken to before tells us, "Your hair looks pretty today, did you crimp it?" it's a little weird to say the least.

 

Are you sure you're not a troll?! If not, you seriously need to get some therapy because this anxiety is going to cut into other aspects of your life too. Unless you're like 15, in which case, I guess it would be understandable.

 

I am serious. so telling a girl she has a cute smile, looks nice, ect would creep her?

[Green]

I am serious. so telling a girl she has a cute smile, looks nice, ect would creep her?

 

for the love of Mike please just go and ask girls out and don't worry about creeping them out. In fact being creepy is good because if you act like a total creep and the girl is into it thats a good sign she likes you. Go up and talk to a girl about vomit and diarea if thats what you feel like doing and then invite her to go do something. Stop worrying about seeming like a creep or being rejected. Don't post in this thread asking for more advice, come back with something new because you've actualy been out there and asking girls out. Nothing is wrong with asking a girl out right away. Sure you may creep alot of girls out. Alot of my friends think I'm something kind of ladies man, but the truth is I get rejected quite a bit also. You can't be so terefied of rejection and seeming like a creep. The bigger the creep the better so go out there and creep as many girls out as you can!

[one goal]

Is it ok to makeout on the first date? Should you?

[Green]

Is it ok to makeout on the first date? Should you?

 

if you feel like making out go ahead and try, if your dates not feeling it she won't even let you kiss her... But if she keeps going out on dates with you eventualy you can make out

[one goal]

if you feel like making out go ahead and try, if your dates not feeling it she won't even let you kiss her... But if she keeps going out on dates with you eventualy you can make out

 

How do you know if it's ok to give her a kiss? Should you let her decide?

[Green]

How do you know if it's ok to give her a kiss? Should you let her decide?

 

No you should try and kiss a girl with out asking, and if she turns you down just act like it never happened, like you don't even care... she'll just move her head and you hit her cheek or she'll completly doge you or something if she doesn't want it. Just kiss the girl

[Konfuzion]

Just grow a set already. Women like men that have a left and a right one.

[one goal]

Well today i took the xanax before i went to school, I felt a little calmer today, not as nervous which is good, but one problem. She was not at school today! So I didnt have any chance to talk to her. I was finally calm, and ready to talk to her more maybe, and my luck has it shes not in class!!

 

that hotter brunette I never talked to before, didnt get a chance to talk to her because we had test in class today and as soon as you finished your test you life, so we didn't leave at the same time.

 

Why do I always have bad luck?

[one goal]

Is it ok if I tell her shes cute or pretty? Would she find that sweet?

[zitwep]

OMG, I about to break my screen. I thought I was bad, but you bring it to a whole new level. All your posts have been "What should I say?"

 

I do admit that I don't approach 99.999% of women I find attractive. But if there is a girl I really dig, I will most of the time find a way to approach her. I am not a big people person and pretty shy. I also tell myself that it's not because a girl is hot that I have to approach her. Find an excuse to talk to her, don't send her a goofy message on facebook or myspace. If you're going to do that, you better find a pretty darn good reason to approach her that way. I did it once, my reason was that I needed help with a project, and it worked, it was slow, but now we're building a good relationship (not a romantic one though). But if you're going to send her something like "Are you angry I didn't talk to you?" on facebook, man, how can you think that can work? That is just wrong! I understand being shy and all, but common sense never hurt anyone, so stop asking 50 times what you should tell her. Don't even think about that, just be spontaneous.

 

The few times that I started talking to girls in class happened totally randomly, never planned for it to happen. Conversation will come, the first few times it'll just be about how the class sucks, over and over, but eventually you guys will move beyond that, this is when you might want to ask her to hang out.

 

Spontaneous situations are the best for me because it means there is no build up or nervousness, no thinking about what you have to say.

 

You keep on giving excuses, but the only reason why you haven't been able to really talk to a "hot chick" is YOU! You're setting yourself up for failure everytime.

[Isolde]

Is it ok if I tell her shes cute or pretty? Would she find that sweet?

 

This is about the fourth time you've asked this. You're OBSESSED.

[Green]

This is about the fourth time you've asked this. You're OBSESSED.

 

yes one goal is obsessed... you could say he has one goal... hahaha anyways telling a girl she is cute is fine its just not the greatest thing to say right off. Just go out there and talk to girls... remember college parties are good places to meet girls and get drunk so you don't have to feel so worried and you just talk

[sid3]

Umm! Should I tell her I think she's really pretty? NO, you should start coming to terms with the idea that you will never have women in your life. It's obvious that your only ****in with everyone who's taken the time to offer you some really solid advice. Even a mildly intelligent person would not ask the exact same question as many times as you have.

I apologize if you are in fact retarded, in which case your excused for being perhaps the biggest chode on this forum.

[Green]

Umm! Should I tell her I think she's really pretty? NO, you should start coming to terms with the idea that you will never have women in your life. It's obvious that your only ****in with everyone who's taken the time to offer you some really solid advice. Even a mildly intelligent person would not ask the exact same question as many times as you have.

I apologize if you are in fact retarded, in which case your excused for being perhaps the biggest chode on this forum.

 

thats fairly rude don't you think. I actually do think this is a special person and there for shouldn't be made fun of

[kashmir]

Look everyone, give one goal a break. Yes, I read through this entire thread, and I realize that it keeps going in circles. One goal, you strike me as being INCREDIBLY socially awkward. I can understand this, because I was once the exact same way. If I liked a girl, I would make an all-out Ocean's Eleven-esque plan how to just do something as simple as smiling at her. Then one thing goes wrong and I panic and eventually become anxious because it didn't work out. I used to be all theoretical...now I'm more practical.

 

You need to find ways to make yourself stand out. I'm not talking strictly about approaching girls either. It's comfortable and easy to blend in with the crowd and never confront anyone, but anyone with any ambition would become miserable doing that. You need to FORCE and DISCIPLINE yourself to go out of your comfort zone. Do you do a physically-exhausting sport? I'm talking about a sport where you HAVE to push your body to the point where it hurts in order to succeed. If you don't, try running or biking as a hobby and do races. It mentally disciplines you. When I want to approach a girl, sometimes I'll say to myself, "There have been dozens and dozens of times where I've been in agonizing pain and kept going. If I could take that, then I DEFINITELY can take the worst some chick has to give to me. I'm strong." Another thing that has helped me is performing music in public. You need to do whatever you can to get over your fear of people. Sometimes approaching girls isn't the best way to start that, so I'm suggesting doing other things that will prepare you better for interacting with people. Learn to deal with people in general, and you'll be one step closer to dealing with girls.

 

I'd say more but I'm in a rush.

 

Oh, and KMT, college parties are really really bad places to meet girls. I'll explain why when I come back.

[Green]

That was actualy a really great post by Kashmir I really enjoyed how he compared the level of detail he would go into like an oceans 11 heist to get a girl. I look at getting girls more like the game I played back in Grade school... Pokemon (I havn't played in years people calm down.)... Gotta catch em all. You see women are like different types of Pokemon... and the same way there was more then one kind of poke ball there is more then one way to catch a girl. In pokemon for the most part you had to battle the pokemon you wanted to catch until it was weakend and then catch it. I personaly do think parties are a good way to get into the social scene at your school... also I think you need to join a team sport... something like basket ball or soccer or flag football and that way you'll make a group of cool good looking guy friends who can invite you to Barbq's and to hang out with them and through being cool you will met girls. Women love cool guys, I mean if you're cool you have to beat the women off you with a stick... Okay hmmm... do me a favor... walk up to a girl you think is cute... any girl... and then I don't care what you say as long as you ask her to come get coffee with you... then come back and post about how you invite a girl you liked to coffee... Oh an I'm from the school of thought women look alot better the less they are wearing so never underestimate how attractive a girl you may not notice in class will look if you see her naked...(don't always go for the most dolled up girl)

[sid3]

I apologize for being rude. I respect your opinion, even though we disagree. I firmly believe special or not, the OP is ****ing with everyone who has been kind enough to take the time and provide some solid advice. Having followed this thread, after the seventh "should I tell her she's pretty", "what should I say" it now appears the help you've provided isn't being considered, let alone applied. Again just my opinion. I'll try and be less judemental in my replies.

[kashmir]

That was actualy a really great post by Kashmir I really enjoyed how he compared the level of detail he would go into like an oceans 11 heist to get a girl. I look at getting girls more like the game I played back in Grade school... Pokemon (I havn't played in years people calm down.)... Gotta catch em all. You see women are like different types of Pokemon... and the same way there was more then one kind of poke ball there is more then one way to catch a girl. In pokemon for the most part you had to battle the pokemon you wanted to catch until it was weakend and then catch it. I personaly do think parties are a good way to get into the social scene at your school... also I think you need to join a team sport... something like basket ball or soccer or flag football and that way you'll make a group of cool good looking guy friends who can invite you to Barbq's and to hang out with them and through being cool you will met girls. Women love cool guys, I mean if you're cool you have to beat the women off you with a stick... Okay hmmm... do me a favor... walk up to a girl you think is cute... any girl... and then I don't care what you say as long as you ask her to come get coffee with you... then come back and post about how you invite a girl you liked to coffee... Oh an I'm from the school of thought women look alot better the less they are wearing so never underestimate how attractive a girl you may not notice in class will look if you see her naked...(don't always go for the most dolled up girl)

 

Lol at the Pokemon reference. Some women are like the dumb generic pigeys, which you can catch with any lame pokeball. Others are almost impossible to find and catch, like that freakin taurus pokemon in that safari place. And then there are those you can only get through a trade.

 

(Yeah, I'm kind of a nerd for remembering all of this from 4th grade...I haven't played in over 10 years either though.)

 

I was saying before about parties not being a good place to meet women. The reason I think this is the party crowd tends to be extremely cliquey. I was at a party last night with a lot of friends from my team. After drinking and screwing around for a bit, I went up to a few different girls over about an hour. All three of them said the same thing right off the bat, essentially this - Do I even know you? Sorry, I'm here with my friends to party and drink, not to talk. I swear that I've heard those exact words sometimes, and this sort of thing happens WAY too often for it to simply be disinterest in me, besides, I know how I act. I do absolutely nothing wrong. I'm confident, I make people laugh, I smile...etc. Girls, at least, just don't want to meet new people when they go out to parties. Sometimes I'll take a look around and notice that a party actually consists of 5 or more smaller groups congregating in their own circle, not associating with anyone else. Myself and a handful of other guys try to break that nonsense, but it's no use.

 

This is what leads me to believe that this generation of girls just don't like guys.

[Green]

yes just like pokemon you have to look for certain types in certain areas, and parties are pretty random you never know who is going to show up. But in my opinion if your going to a party people tend to be girls tend to be alot more friendly. Plus Kashmir you and the OP and alot of guys seem to take rejection to personaly. You should try flirting with every cute girl you see when your single and before you know it you have a couple of options. If I thought some cute girl at the supermarket was flirting at me when she comments on my shirt or what ever I don't worry about taking it to far I just go ahead and try to invite her out to something and then say I should get her number if she accepts, I've gone as far as to hit on women in the drive thru window, or my waitress or some one in a class. If you flirty and fun about it and you ask them to do something in a nice way even when you get rejected which happens alot it doesn't hurt and you just don't take it personaly because there is no point. Girls have always been the way they are now they don't hate men, they just don't know what they want. Look at superman, he can get any girl he wants, but he loves Lois Lane, who thinks hes the biggest Dork when hes Clark but hot sht when hes in his cape and tights... Thats how I think of myself like superman and the girls who reject me just saw me as clark kent but if they had got to know me they would have seen I'm alot more.