Krajt Posted September 20, 2008 Posted September 20, 2008 I feel too fat. I have become very self conscious over the past two years and it keeps irking me. I am 5'8 and weigh 133 -135. I feel as though my face is too fat, when I move my head at times, it looks like I have two chins and my stomach although not flabby is hardly lean. I go to the gym and I exercise, but it doesn't seem to thin. I also tend to put on weight and lose it. Does anyone have any advice on how to tackle a fat face and a not so lean stomach?
lonelyandfrustrated Posted September 20, 2008 Posted September 20, 2008 I'm 5'5 and 140 and I'm not fat. I look much better than I did at 110lbs; I have hips and curves and breasts! Don't be so critical of yourself. Get your nose out of magazines; they airbrush the photos, not the girls. I good haircut can do wonders for a full face. Try this: pull your hair back and stand in front of your bathroom mirror. use an eyeliner or a lipstick and trace the outline of your face on the mirror. It'll come out round or oval or square or pear--whatever. Then run to hairboutique.com and put in your face shape (you can also sort by haircolor and length) and it'll pop up a bunch of photos of flattering styles. If your current style is not represented, think about trying a new one! For the belly...no advice except don't have four kids! lol. Women's stomaches naturally have a bit of a pooch. The rock-hard abs you see on tv and in magazines are not the natural for women. I suggest you learn to accept some softly feminine features. Assuming, of course, you're female! How bad is that, I assume you're a woman because you have these body issues?
Author Krajt Posted September 20, 2008 Author Posted September 20, 2008 It would be easier if I a woman, no I am a male who is deeply self conscious about his appearance.
carhill Posted September 20, 2008 Posted September 20, 2008 Get some counseling. Self-image, including body image, is rooted in the psyche. And, no, it's not "easier" if you're a woman. As a man, you have no clue what women deal with (I'm a man, like you). Self-acceptance is key to a long, healthy life. None of us are perfect. Life experience will help, but I'd still suggest counseling...
lonelyandfrustrated Posted September 20, 2008 Posted September 20, 2008 It would be easier if I a woman, no I am a male who is deeply self conscious about his appearance. You should certainly seek help for your skewed body image. That height, that weight for a man is skinny to me. Your image of yourself most certainly doesn't match what others see. I have a friend who's husband is constantly dieting and working out and complaining about how he can never get off these last few pounds...and to me, he's a stick-figure of a man. I think he needs to gain weight! Sorry about the female assumption. It didn't strike me as an assumption until I was well into my post, but I figured I'd leave it there in case anyone can use what i said. But the advice re: don't compare yourself to media images stands, no matter the gender.
Author Krajt Posted September 20, 2008 Author Posted September 20, 2008 I don't think I need counselling, I just need to firm up my face and chest, but it's proving more difficult than I imagined. My face and stomach doesn't match the rest of my body, I have a horrid body. Muscular legs, skinny arms, chunky head and I'm developing a chubby belly.
SexinmyCity Posted September 20, 2008 Posted September 20, 2008 Time for therapy my dear. And stop looking in mirrors, trust me, it helps. I used to be where you are, and I am no longer. Jesus loves you!
lonelyandfrustrated Posted September 20, 2008 Posted September 20, 2008 I don't think I need counselling, I just need to firm up my face and chest, but it's proving more difficult than I imagined. My face and stomach doesn't match the rest of my body, I have a horrid body. Muscular legs, skinny arms, chunky head and I'm developing a chubby belly. I'd need to see a photo before I could rule out the counseling suggestion. I don't think I've seen a truly horrid body, except those people with the warts that grow into things that look like tree roots. *shivers* Yeah, get a picture of one of those guys, and post it on your mirror and every morning, look at it and then look at you and be blessed for your fantastic, functioning body.
Author Krajt Posted September 20, 2008 Author Posted September 20, 2008 Why is wanting to better yourself such a bad thing? I strive for perfection in all walks of my life, is that such a heinous thing? I also suffer from emotionally instability and bouts of depression and have never needed therapy. I will add that I am at my happiest when I can appreciate myself and at the moment I cannot.
carhill Posted September 20, 2008 Posted September 20, 2008 If you don't believe counseling will help you, it won't. Try this....consult a plastic surgeon regarding your chin and belly fat. Get a professional opinion.
lonelyandfrustrated Posted September 20, 2008 Posted September 20, 2008 Why is wanting to better yourself such a bad thing? I strive for perfection in all walks of my life, is that such a heinous thing? I also suffer from emotionally instability and bouts of depression and have never needed therapy. I will add that I am at my happiest when I can appreciate myself and at the moment I cannot. Nobody is saying that bettering yourself is a bad thing. It's a good thing! But you did divulge your stats (gah! So did I!), and it leads me (and perhaps others, tho I can't speak for them) to believe that you have a body image problem that is unreasonable. Dysmorphic? Something like that, where a person perceives that they are 'horrid' and 'fat' when it simply isn't true. As to the part of your post that I bolded: perhaps you don't believe you 'need it', but perhaps you would 'benefit from it'. I'm just asking you to consider it. Don't knock it 'til you try it! For the chin stuff, there's the Lifestyle Lift that I've seen advertised, and for the tummy, there's lipo and tucks. You can go that route if it makes you feel better. I think a better alternative is to get comfortable in the skin you have.
SexinmyCity Posted September 20, 2008 Posted September 20, 2008 Seriously, stop looking in mirrors! I have been where you are. I could stare in a mirror and by the time I was done, be in tears knowing I was the most hideous person on the face of the planet, wondering how I had any friends at all. And it simply isn't the truth...it's some weird wiring in the brain that makes you go a little cooo-kooo sometimes. One thing that helped me was to tell myself "ok, you have the same face, same body, same arms, same everything you did yesterday, and yesterday you felt fine. Nothing has changed. It's all in your mind." I also went to the beach and looked at all the different body types, knowing that probably each one of the people could find two or three things they hated about themselves. Then I just decided to get over it. Life is too short!
westernxer Posted September 21, 2008 Posted September 21, 2008 It would be easier if I a woman, no I am a male who is deeply self conscious about his appearance. Any guy who's 5'8" 135 lbs. has to be a bean pole. We're the same height, and I outweigh you by almost 60 lbs... I should be the one with issues. LOL
superd Posted September 21, 2008 Posted September 21, 2008 krajt, if you do anything at all don't feel the need to make yourself more unique or to differentiate yourself from other girls. This means no or at least no more toungue rings, tattoos, mutiple ear peircings etc. That is the number one mistake that slightly "overweight" (i hate to use that term) women try to do and it accomplishes nothing. If you want to do those things wait to later in life. This advice seems strange but trust me I speak from experience.
xpaperxcutx Posted September 21, 2008 Posted September 21, 2008 Why do you need to make yourself skinny? Most girls don't like guys who are skinny or guys that are skinnier than them. You need to stop agonizing yourself because the problem isn't that you're fat. You just need to develop muscles in certain areas of your body to balance the rest. Work on weights instead of running, and lots of pushups and bench presses.
whichwayisup Posted September 21, 2008 Posted September 21, 2008 Can I ask how old you are? Do yoga, it'll tighten up your tummy muscles. Also do sit-ups too. As for the face and the feeling you get with the double chin, is it when you bend over or tilt your head down? Just keep in mind, we're our own worst critics, so what you see in the mirror isn't always reality.
Author Krajt Posted September 21, 2008 Author Posted September 21, 2008 I'm 21 yrs old. I get my chin when I tilt my head downwards, otherwise it's not noticeable. I suppose we are our own worst critics, my girlfriend is becoming tired with it. She seems happy enough with me, but you can't vouch your own self worth by accepting someone else's opinion. You need to validate yourself.
westernxer Posted September 21, 2008 Posted September 21, 2008 Everyone has a double chin when they tilt their head down. LOL
Author Krajt Posted September 21, 2008 Author Posted September 21, 2008 I've never noticed other people's before, but mine is very noticeable.
westernxer Posted September 21, 2008 Posted September 21, 2008 You can always get plastic surgery if it's that bad, but since you're only 135 lbs., I doubt it's as bad as you think.
Author Krajt Posted September 21, 2008 Author Posted September 21, 2008 I doubt it is, I will just keep on going to the gym. I've kept away from mirrors all day and actually feel happier about my appearance.
strongertoday Posted September 27, 2008 Posted September 27, 2008 ok stay away from mirrors....problem solved..... well done
Ocean-Blue Posted September 27, 2008 Posted September 27, 2008 I hear P90X (by Tony Horton) works (according to my bf). Though I haven't seen him in a few weeks, he says it produces results (he's apparently done some research on it). I wonder if it does.
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