stuckinoz Posted September 19, 2008 Posted September 19, 2008 I have heard numerous times in this forum the term "Walk Away Wife". What is that....what does it mean? I have an idea - But would like to hear before I add in my 2 cents worth on the phrase.
bish Posted September 19, 2008 Posted September 19, 2008 I have heard numerous times in this forum the term "Walk Away Wife". What is that....what does it mean? I have an idea - But would like to hear before I add in my 2 cents worth on the phrase. It means its time for celebration!!!!!
Owl Posted September 19, 2008 Posted September 19, 2008 In the context of infidelity, its a woman who is engaged in an "exit affair". An affair with the specific intent that she will "exit" her current marriage and go directly into a marriage/living arrangement with her OM. She's using the affair relationship to REPLACE her marriage, and aid her in leaving her H. A "walk away wife" in this situation is one who's already set on leaving her H...she's already checked out of her marriage emotionally. She's set to go already in her mind. My wife was pretty much in the mindset when she was busted on d-day.
Author stuckinoz Posted September 19, 2008 Author Posted September 19, 2008 So what's the phrase to refer to a MAN that leaves his marriage for similar reasons? A stud?
Owl Posted September 19, 2008 Posted September 19, 2008 I don't know that there is a specific phrase for a man... Not justifying it...he's just as 'wrong' as a woman doing the same thing is. I don't know anyone who'd consider him a "stud".
Rooster_DAR Posted September 19, 2008 Posted September 19, 2008 So what's the phrase to refer to a MAN that leaves his marriage for similar reasons? A stud? A dud?......
sxyNYCcpl Posted September 19, 2008 Posted September 19, 2008 A "walk away wife" in this situation is one who's already set on leaving her H...she's already checked out of her marriage emotionally. She's set to go already in her mind. Interesting. So the affair is an excuse to end a relationship that a "walk away wife" lacked to courage to just end absent an excuse? In this case, the affair is the symptom of a broken marriage, not the cause?
Owl Posted September 19, 2008 Posted September 19, 2008 An affair is a symptom of SOMETHING, certainly. A marriage isn't always broken by both partners. Often, the reason a marriage is broken is because one of the spouses is broken themselves. They step out of the marriage even when the other partner is doing all that they can to save the marriage. Some marriages are destroyed by actions on both parts, absolutely. But not all...and that's something that it seems so many people don't get. It takes ONE person to have an affair. One person to be self-centered to the point that the marriage is unable to survive. And regardless of how "bad" a marriage has become...the choice to cheat is ALWAYS the responsibilty of the person who cheated. In the "walk away wife", its entirely possible that the betrayed husband wasn't at fault at all. She could be narcissitic, she could be someone who's become addicted to the "in love" stage of a relationship and simply cannot understand what a longer lasting, more mature love is like...and so moves on every few years into a new relationship. As far as symptom vs cause...its a good question, but a moot point most of the time. In MY situation, my wife was pretty much in an exit affair. When confronted, she and OM decided for her to move away and live with him. The CAUSE of the situation, and her unhappiness, had very little to do with me. It was much more wrapped around her untreated depression and online gaming addiction than it was to anything I was doing or not doing. Luckily, we were able to work things out. She ended up not leaving, got treatment for her depression, and ended her gaming addiction. That, coupled with some very minor changes on my part (mostly centered around consolidating our parenting skills with our older kids) allowed us to recover our marriage. Make sense? 1
sxyNYCcpl Posted September 19, 2008 Posted September 19, 2008 Sure does. Obviously, I'm new here, so with the exception of what I just read in this message I know absolutely nothing about you or your history. I agree, though, affairs are typically indicative of underlying problems. Which is to say, they're a symptom, not the disease.
Trialbyfire Posted September 19, 2008 Posted September 19, 2008 In an open marriage, does this mean there are major, major symptoms of problems in the marriage?
Owl Posted September 19, 2008 Posted September 19, 2008 Yes, and no. Remember...sometimes you have to treat the symptoms before you can treat the disease. If you're treating someone for a massive infection, sometimes you've got to get the fever down before it kills them...THEN you worry about administering the antibiotics for the disease. Affairs are VERY much the same thing for marriages. The affair can kill the marriage FASTER than the disease normally will. You have to treat the affair as the CAUSE first...once its dealt with, THEN you can focus on underlying causes.
sxyNYCcpl Posted September 19, 2008 Posted September 19, 2008 In an open marriage, does this mean there are major, major symptoms of problems in the marriage? No, because consensual non-monogamy does not constitute an affair.
Owl Posted September 19, 2008 Posted September 19, 2008 My "yes and no" response was to the comment about affairs being symptom or disease...not to the question as to whether or not an "open" marriage has major symptoms. Wanted to make sure that was clear.
Author stuckinoz Posted September 22, 2008 Author Posted September 22, 2008 Not sure I buy any of this.....not that it's for sale .....But seems funny to me that there is this grand title for a WOMAN..........but nothing for when a man checks out of his marriage. Just seems odd to me. I find it hard to believe that an AFFAIR is what constitutes a "Walk Away Wife" title.
bish Posted September 22, 2008 Posted September 22, 2008 Not sure I buy any of this.....not that it's for sale .....But seems funny to me that there is this grand title for a WOMAN..........but nothing for when a man checks out of his marriage. Oh there is...the man would be a "Bastard, Leaving His Wife In The Lurch Husband" I find it hard to believe that an AFFAIR is what constitutes a "Walk Away Wife" title. It doesn't, but in this forum it usually does mean an affair is involved.
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