Hamz Posted September 18, 2008 Posted September 18, 2008 So, I posted the other day that I found out that I have herpes and my boyfriend revealed that he cheated on me one night a couple of months ago. I am still terribly conflicted. I love him so much, and want things to work out. Is it stupid of me to want to forgive him and start to rebuild our relationship? We did break up last summer (2007) because when he graduated from college he moved back to NY (mostly for his career, which I understand). I wasn't really ready for a LDR, and was confused and scared and broke up with him. We started dating again last winter, and then decided to be monogamous this past Feb. We love each other very much, and we can both see the other in our future. He shows a lot of remorse for what he has done, is truly torn up about it (as he should be), is going to start counseling, and even suggested couple's counseling. He keeps telling me how much he loves me, and wants me in his future-wants to marry me. I do think he means all of these things, but at the same time he didn't express all of this before I found out- is he saying these things just to hold on? I guess I just need to decide if he's worth it... how do you know?
sweet&simple Posted September 19, 2008 Posted September 19, 2008 Honestly, I don't think you'll ever really know 100% if staying or leaving will be right for you until you give it a shot. While I agree that it's nice to see he's taking responsibility for everything and taking action to correct the situation and get himself some help.. I'd be weary that he's only doing it because you found out.. if you didn't get the STD and confronted him about it, it's doubtful he would have told you [i'm just saying this because he had months to do so, and didn't. People who are truly remorseful and know they have done wrong own up to things, not hide them.] If you feel you love him and it's something you can get past, give it a shot. For me, personally, I'd ditch him. If some guy who is supposed to be monogamous with me gives me herpes, I'd bail. It's one thing to disrespect someone by cheating, it's another to not only cheat, but also have a total disregard for your partners health by having unprotected sex [that's just a guess, but I'm assuming since you contracted an STD from him, that must have been what happened.]
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