used2bspunky Posted September 17, 2008 Posted September 17, 2008 Why is this so hard for me to do? I have no real photos, just what is in my phone, of him.. and his numbers of course. I actually don't have his home number memorized b/c I rarely called it. I'm having a hard time hitting that delete button.. why.. ? :(
nopainnogain Posted September 17, 2008 Posted September 17, 2008 Just do it. Send the pics to an email account you never use. Never look at them again . Delete the ones off your phone.
verve Posted September 17, 2008 Posted September 17, 2008 Delete em, its a symbolic gesture of you moving on. It takes away the temptation to contact and it'll stop you looking over them pictures, dredging horrible feelings up time and time again. Trust me, just do it, you'll thank me in a couple of weeks and regret it in a couple of weeks if you don't.
Ingenue Posted September 17, 2008 Posted September 17, 2008 go ahead used2bspunky, delete the numbers and pictures. I know it's hard, but sometimes you need the physical act of doing to trigger the symbolic acceptance. If you're reluctant to completely erase your ex from your life, download the pictures to a CD/DVD and put it away in your closet. That way you still have them, but they're out of sight. I know when I did that with my ex's things, it really helped me. I put everything away in a closet, deleted all the messages, emails, chats, letters, files I had received from him, answering machine messages and all the pictures I had of him. They're no longer taunting me every time I turn on my computer or listen to my answering machine. And, if I'm really feeling completely nostalgic, they're in a place that I know I can get to if I need.
Author used2bspunky Posted September 17, 2008 Author Posted September 17, 2008 go ahead used2bspunky, delete the numbers and pictures. I know it's hard, but sometimes you need the physical act of doing to trigger the symbolic acceptance. If you're reluctant to completely erase your ex from your life, download the pictures to a CD/DVD and put it away in your closet. That way you still have them, but they're out of sight. I know when I did that with my ex's things, it really helped me. I put everything away in a closet, deleted all the messages, emails, chats, letters, files I had received from him, answering machine messages and all the pictures I had of him. They're no longer taunting me every time I turn on my computer or listen to my answering machine. And, if I'm really feeling completely nostalgic, they're in a place that I know I can get to if I need. Yes, those final text messages were haunting me.. mainly because I can see in black and white, the pathetic desparation in my tone with him. I'm sure he has erased me from his life completely too. Ok.. 2 weeks and 2 days now -- Man, it's feeling like forever! He still has some of my stuff damnit, that he said he was gonna send to me, 2 weeks ago. I deleted his pics and his contact info. Wow.
nopainnogain Posted September 17, 2008 Posted September 17, 2008 I deleted his pics and his contact info. Wow. good job. Now forget your stuff and forget him. Get new stuff and a new man.
Author used2bspunky Posted September 17, 2008 Author Posted September 17, 2008 good job. Now forget your stuff and forget him. Get new stuff and a new man. He has to turn me on and fulfill me like this guy did.. I'm never settling again. I settled with my husband, and actually had doubts going down the aisle - then a difficult 8 year marriage that ended in divorce. Never again. I'm not a 10, or a 9 for that matter, but I have too much to offer someone. I deserve to be happy - AND get a new man, and new "stuff".
Islandgirl03 Posted September 17, 2008 Posted September 17, 2008 A friend of mine actually took my phone and deleted the number for me. I've been doing well with the NC, but he didn't want me to have a weak moment. I've no pics in my phone, but I've had to stop myself looking at all my actual pics and the ones on my computer. I did the same, I created a folder and put them in that folder, and now I can ignore them. And maybe, when I'm over this, and completely moved on, I will be able to go back and look at the pics and think "wow that was a fun vacation" or "what a great St. Patty's day", not think "wow I miss him so much, what happened?" You could have a friend do it for you. I don't think I could have done it myself, but once the friend deleted the number, I felt more empowered to delete the e-mails myself, and get the pics out of sight. I'll tell you what the friend did do though. He wrote the number down before he deleted it, and kept it. This way if I ever do NEED to contact him for some reason (like someone else said on my thread, the only good reason would be health/emergency reasons) it's not completely gone. I'm horrible with memorizing numbers, so i didn't have it memorized. You will feel better about it in a few weeks after you've done it.
Issues & tissues Posted September 17, 2008 Posted September 17, 2008 It's been almost 9 months since my ex broke up with me. Had been together for 10 years. Have been doing NC since March. Still can't bring myself to delete his number or get rid of the jacket which he left in the wardrobe. Have no idea why this last symbolic action is just so damn hard! Hmmm may have the jacket converted into a pair of comfy slippers.
CaliGuy Posted September 17, 2008 Posted September 17, 2008 Why is this so hard for me to do? I have no real photos, just what is in my phone, of him.. and his numbers of course. I actually don't have his home number memorized b/c I rarely called it. I'm having a hard time hitting that delete button.. why.. ? :( Because you hope deep down he will call you or that you want to call him. You will know that you have accepted it's over when you are OK with deleting his number and pictures and not regret it. Don't have ANY of my ex's numbers and what few pics I have are stashed far, far from site. I accepted it's over and am so looking forward to my dates (been going out a lot lately). I've got my groove back, so to speak, but it didn't start until I let go of the past.
Author used2bspunky Posted September 17, 2008 Author Posted September 17, 2008 Because you hope deep down he will call you or that you want to call him. You will know that you have accepted it's over when you are OK with deleting his number and pictures and not regret it. Don't have ANY of my ex's numbers and what few pics I have are stashed far, far from site. I accepted it's over and am so looking forward to my dates (been going out a lot lately). I've got my groove back, so to speak, but it didn't start until I let go of the past. Well, I did it -- gone, deleted. There is no reason to hold onto that stuff, if after two weeks he hasn't checked in on me, he isn't going to. I do feel better getting rid of them.
darnay Posted September 17, 2008 Posted September 17, 2008 I miss him like hell but i deleted ALL the photos i have stored on my PC of my ex and my ex and me. I also changed my mobile phone number and deleted him from my MSN, then accessed his MSN (cus he left his password saved on my laptop) and deleted me from his MSN, so he is gone for good on that. I blocked his emails from coming, and did the same for his circle of friends. It hurts like hell but i need to get that man out of my head. He hurt me bad and yet i stayed in contact when he dumped me the first time around, i'm not revisiting that again this second time. He's history!
CaliGuy Posted September 17, 2008 Posted September 17, 2008 Well, I did it -- gone, deleted. There is no reason to hold onto that stuff, if after two weeks he hasn't checked in on me, he isn't going to. I do feel better getting rid of them. Good on you, dudette. Now you can start moving foward with your life instead of looking back!
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