Dirk Diggler Posted September 15, 2008 Posted September 15, 2008 Do I have a self-esteem problem?? I never thot I did but now… ??? I’m attractive, smart, funny and I have a great little boy. I try to reason that I fell into the trap of thinking I could change someone for the better and failed. But instead of embracing that it’s really HIS failure as a person, I’m beating myself up for not being successful. I should be celebrating, not sad. Tell me I’m wrong or kick me in the ass… I think life gave you another chance, unloading a loser like that. I don't think he was in it with a long term mind set. If so knowing he lives with you and is expected to contribute to you and also taking on your son. Is very immature to lose a job like that let alone, ditch it with no prospects. You can't change people, only help. They have to do the actual work themselves. Your boyfriend not only failed himself, but you and your son. You were supposed to be his GF not his mom and should only have to raise one son! So no i don't think you were wrong. Make good use of the opportunity to find someone whom does not portray the above person.
Author SmartBlonde79 Posted September 16, 2008 Author Posted September 16, 2008 I think life gave you another chance, unloading a loser like that. I don't think he was in it with a long term mind set. If so knowing he lives with you and is expected to contribute to you and also taking on your son. Is very immature to lose a job like that let alone, ditch it with no prospects. You can't change people, only help. They have to do the actual work themselves. Your boyfriend not only failed himself, but you and your son. You were supposed to be his GF not his mom and should only have to raise one son! So no i don't think you were wrong. Make good use of the opportunity to find someone whom does not portray the above person. Agreed! BTW, I LOVE the name!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dirk Diggler Posted September 16, 2008 Posted September 16, 2008 Besides, after the scene he caused yesterday over a trivial, insignificant BOARD GAME, he sealed the deal. but when HE feels threatened, he gets to snatch up all of his TOYS like a selfish brat?? The board game had to go right that minute at the expense of my son and his friend?? I DON'T THINK SO. So tell me, after your ex-boyfriend lost 3 games in a row of Candyland to your son and his friend. Did he knock the game over and retreat back to his parents place to comfort the blow and try to repair his damaged ego!? Agreed! BTW, I LOVE the name!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And look at you all giddy about my *screen name*!
Capricciosa Posted September 16, 2008 Posted September 16, 2008 I love Capricciosa's post, too!! You rock! Thanks ladies--I just try to tell it like it is, and I do not like leeches. As a long-time self-reliant person, that kind of attitude just does not compute -- it registers as sheer laziness to me, and I don't have much patience or sympathy for that. I am 100% in agreement. There is a difference between needing a helping hand when you are in a rough spot and waiting around for your golden opportunity to fall out of the sky. I too am one of those people who could survive wherever you dropped me--I've had dozens of weird little jobs, I've started my own temporary businesses, using whatever skills I have at my disposal. I supposed I didn't have the advantage of hand outs, and have always had to fend for myself, but isn't it a matter of self-respect too? How is it better to be living off others than to have some sort of job? Doesn't that affect the self-esteem of these people? Or is it purely an attitude and way of life that I don't understand (like I don't understand my welfare cheat neighbor, who is just another type of leech)?
SoleMate Posted September 16, 2008 Posted September 16, 2008 Walking out on you was the best thing he ever did. It was plastered all over with his selfishness and churlishness. Snatching the game from the children was just the cherry on the sundae. You are better off without him. You may have been compatible in bed, but not in life in general. He was a slacker/user/rider, you are a responsible worker with standards.
AriaIncognito Posted September 16, 2008 Posted September 16, 2008 Yes, I NEED someone who wants to be a team player. Someone who wants to take care of me as well as I want to take care of them. It doesn't matter to me how much money he makes but it IS important to me that he contributes something. And not just financially. Were you ever upset by the break up?? Did you ever miss him?? Of course I was upset by the break up. But time healed my wounds. I knew I was doing the right thing, even though it hurt my heart. It took me a while but I was eventually able to be around him and not have any want for the relationship back. I know I needed more than he was ever willing to provide. Sure, it's hard as h*ll to walk away from someone you feel you love/loved, but well, if you know it's not right, no amount of wishing is going to change that.
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