is it too late to save

[rebecca1]

Hi all. im not sure if any1 remembers me. wrote here a few months back about my problems with my fiancee's porn habit that was breaking my heart... well its all gone i think. but things are as bad as ever.. he left me this morning. guess it wasn't the porn after all and just me. ive recently been diagnosed as borderline personality.. its really hard, and as soon as i think im getting a good grip on things something else comes along to ruin the peace. he has been smoking cannibis daily, i have asked him to stop as we have 2 small kids (5yrs-girl, and 6month boy) its a no win situation, if he does stop he sulks that im controlling, if i let him my moods go off the wall as i hate it. it turned violent last night. i hit him on the head when he called me a slut and he lost it and really hurt me. is there away around all this or should i let him go. the problem is i love him more than anyone else in the world. is this typical borderline personality relationship ar can it be fixed

[stillafool]

I think the two of you are toxic for each other. It seems to be one thing and then another with you two all the time. Now that it has become abusively physcial between the two of you I think this is the last straw. You guys aren't even married and this is happening. I think it is time to pick up and move on and stop trying to change him into what you want him to be. He is who he is and will not change.

[rebecca1]

thank u for ur reply.. deep down i no your right. its just so hard when i love him so much. when were happy were like different people.. were such a great team, we just cant seem to control our emotions, it always gets out of hand. and ur right it is toxic when its bad, if i had 1 wish it would be that we could control our anger. im finding it so hard to throw away 7 years of my life

[stillafool]

Then why don't the two of you get couples counseling first and see how that goes.