frenchgirl Posted September 14, 2008 Posted September 14, 2008 Hi, I decided to turn down the guy who freaked out on me for not calling him back within a few hours. A good friend of mine really shocked me by inviting me out at a very "chic" restaurant here in Paris. I asked him whether it was a date and he hesitated for a bit before answering "oui"! I told him I was flattered but would have to think about it. I really don't know how to approach this as I'm not sure about him as a romantic partner and I don't want to lose him as a friend. Meanwhile, I don't want to turn him down completely either as we've had a few flirting moments in the past that were quite pleasant. How can I approach this with him? Do you think I should go for dinner with him even though I'm unsure about my feelings?
Rooster_DAR Posted September 14, 2008 Posted September 14, 2008 Hi, I decided to turn down the guy who freaked out on me for not calling him back within a few hours. A good friend of mine really shocked me by inviting me out at a very "chic" restaurant here in Paris. I asked him whether it was a date and he hesitated for a bit before answering "oui"! I told him I was flattered but would have to think about it. I really don't know how to approach this as I'm not sure about him as a romantic partner and I don't want to lose him as a friend. Meanwhile, I don't want to turn him down completely either as we've had a few flirting moments in the past that were quite pleasant. How can I approach this with him? Do you think I should go for dinner with him even though I'm unsure about my feelings? One of the reasons you date someone is to see if you could be romantically compatible. If you are serious about keeping him as a friend only, you will have to state your intentions. If you lose him over that, you have no control over how he feels. I say go for it, sometimes romance comes about in mysterious ways. Good luck,
Tony T Posted September 14, 2008 Posted September 14, 2008 Just be totally honest with him. There is simply no way you can give him a day or time when you can accurately pronounce that you just want him as a friend or you'd like more. Now that you know where his head is at, you can explore yours but don't rush things. I can't think of a much better situation that falling in love with someone who is also a good friend.
Author frenchgirl Posted September 14, 2008 Author Posted September 14, 2008 One of the reasons you date someone is to see if you could be romantically compatible. If you are serious about keeping him as a friend only, you will have to state your intentions. If you lose him over that, you have no control over how he feels. I say go for it, sometimes romance comes about in mysterious ways. Good luck, Cool. I'm just afraid that going for dinner with him will get his hopes up thus creating more pressure for me. I could tell him I'm unsure about things - and that would get this hopes up as well!
Author frenchgirl Posted September 14, 2008 Author Posted September 14, 2008 Just be totally honest with him. There is simply no way you can give him a day or time when you can accurately pronounce that you just want him as a friend or you'd like more. Now that you know where his head is at, you can explore yours but don't rush things. I can't think of a much better situation that falling in love with someone who is also a good friend. Thanks Tony! He is a good guy and I always laugh when I'm with him. Never thought about him romantically until recently though!
Rooster_DAR Posted September 14, 2008 Posted September 14, 2008 Cool. I'm just afraid that going for dinner with him will get his hopes up thus creating more pressure for me. I could tell him I'm unsure about things - and that would get this hopes up as well! Well, if he's anything like me he will go into the date without any concrete expectations. When I date someone (even if I'm already head over heals for them), I don't get my expectations too high, that is immature. Hopefully for him is that he has enough charm, confidence, and charisma to push you onto the loveboat. Good luck on your date!
blondiepants Posted September 14, 2008 Posted September 14, 2008 Change it to a lunch?! There is a much less romantic/date-y feel to a lunch. Maybe the more casual atmosphere will stress you out less?
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