mswonderful Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 so, i finally get the chance today to introduce myself to the guy in the gym and i may have blown it. finally went to the gym by myself, and he and i left at the same exact time. before we left, i was still ont eh treadmill, but he stopped and talked to this girl who now works at the gym who is young, friends with all the workers, has alot of attitude, and most of all, has some big implants. haha. so then i finally finish on the treadmill, and as i'm walking out, he's now talking to the front desk guy, and I hear the front desk guy say "it's abotu time there's a woman in here to intimidate the boys." and then the dude i'm interested in is like "yeah, don't spread any dirt on me." of course, i assume since he just talked to Ms. Implants that he was proobably talking about her. so then he holds the door open for me and i have that golden opportunity to introduce myself to him cuz it's only us out there, and all i can say is thanks. i was planning to introduce myself before he was talking to Implants for like 10 minutes and then mentioned something about an intimidating female to the front desk guy, but I just assume he was talking about her to him, cuz he just talked to her. plus, if he viewed that time to introduce himself to me as an opportunity to get to know me, he would have taken it, right? i wonder if i just blew something or if other people would have felt the same way....
JoeNewbie Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 There are a LOT of times where I think I should talk to someone on the spur of the moment, but for one reason or another I just don't. I wouldn't worry about that incident too much and try again next time.
Author mswonderful Posted September 13, 2008 Author Posted September 13, 2008 There are a LOT of times where I think I should talk to someone on the spur of the moment, but for one reason or another I just don't. I wouldn't worry about that incident too much and try again next time. haha i like your positive outlook. i just read your post about positivity.
Shygirl15 Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 How do you measure up in terms of looks with Ms. Implants? Appears to me that could be his kind of looks. Initially, its all about physical attraction Ms. Wonderful.
Author mswonderful Posted September 13, 2008 Author Posted September 13, 2008 How do you measure up in terms of looks with Ms. Implants? Appears to me that could be his kind of looks. Initially, its all about physical attraction Ms. Wonderful. Way better face, and I'm thin, but not toned. This girl has an ugly face (thought so before he ever talked to her), but she has one of those exercise 24/7 chicks bodies, with implants. I know alot of guys go for body over face. Plus, I just kinda felt like well, he obviously has the balls to go and talk to that girl, so if he was interested in me, he would have spoken to me. Meh!
OpenBook Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 I don't think you blew anything. This guy has already demonstrated quite clearly that he's not shy. If he wants to come after you, he will - you don't have to do a thing! If I were in your aerobics shoes, I wouldn't take the risk of introducing myself to him. Let him come to you. Just go on about your business - you're there to exercise, you have a very busy life and need to keep on top of your game. Let the men parade in front of you, like peacocks, vying for your attention. That's what they were born to do! And anyway, you've already witnessed him hitting on Miss Implants. And I suspect he is well aware of that. (From what the Front Desk said, there are only a few females who frequent your gym - so I am sure all the men there have noticed you as well as Implants and any other female who shows up) Hence, the reason why he didn't try to start up a conversation when he held open the door for you. He is gauging your behavior before he strikes - thinking, are you a jealous female that will cause him trouble if he should tangle with you AND with whomever else he wants? Or, he may not be interested in you (at least, currently) at all. So what?? The good news is that the gym is chock-full of men. He is only one of many. Don't lose sight of that! I would sit tight... and wear your sexiest little gym outfits when you go. See how it plays out. And by far most importantly - have fun!! You're in the catbird seat!
Lizzie60 Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 If I were you.. I'd wait ... what if this Ms Implant is his type of girl.. (maybe that's why he keeps talking to her, hoping to get his chance)... Do you feel confident enough about your looks to 'challenge' her... Just wait and see ... you'll eventually get the 'feeling' if you have a chance or not.. If you do it too quickly.. and he's not interested.. then it will be harder for you to see him at the gym.. or it might even 'force' you to change your gym time.. which is not good. Proceed with caution.
JoeNewbie Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 Implants always get our attention alright. Personally, I've dated a woman with implants but also plenty of women with small breasts.
Author mswonderful Posted September 13, 2008 Author Posted September 13, 2008 If I were you.. I'd wait ... what if this Ms Implant is his type of girl.. (maybe that's why he keeps talking to her, hoping to get his chance)... Do you feel confident enough about your looks to 'challenge' her... Just wait and see ... you'll eventually get the 'feeling' if you have a chance or not.. If you do it too quickly.. and he's not interested.. then it will be harder for you to see him at the gym.. or it might even 'force' you to change your gym time.. which is not good. Proceed with caution. I think you're right. I most definitely measure up to her looks, but I really don't want to compete. I want him to be interested in me, not to dance around for him. I have a long history of "chasing" guys and "making things work." I promised myself after my last relationship ended a year ago and after this weird rejection I had during my last year of college that I would finally let a guy pursue me. So I'm really also trying to not become obsessive about guys--especially ones that I don't even really know.
JoeNewbie Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 I think you're right. I most definitely measure up to her looks, but I really don't want to compete. I want him to be interested in me, not to dance around for him. I have a long history of "chasing" guys and "making things work." I promised myself after my last relationship ended a year ago and after this weird rejection I had during my last year of college that I would finally let a guy pursue me. So I'm really also trying to not become obsessive about guys--especially ones that I don't even really know. I may get bashed for this but I've noticed how women who are "chasing" guys hardly ever get positive results. As most women can get what they want by simply waiting, the more aggressive ones are oftentimes labelled as "desperate". I personally prefer a woman who gives out signals that it's ok to pursue her - and then let me do my part!
Shygirl15 Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 Lizzie has a great advice. Just cool off for now and observe. Don't subject yourself to an embarrassing situation right now.
Author mswonderful Posted September 13, 2008 Author Posted September 13, 2008 I may get bashed for this but I've noticed how women who are "chasing" guys hardly ever get positive results. As most women can get what they want by simply waiting, the more aggressive ones are oftentimes labelled as "desperate". I personally prefer a woman who gives out signals that it's ok to pursue her - and then let me do my part! No...I completely agree with you. Believe me, I've hooked the guy most of the time, but the ones I've hooked were honestly wimpy (maybe why they let me do all the work?) and the one rejection I got was very disrespectful. That's why I'm feeling like I don't want to force it and I want to feel wanted rather than throw myself at him or compete! And the reason why I wasn't too keen on taking that moment to introduce myself...but like everyone says I guess we'll see? I want to be wanted, damn it!
Lizzie60 Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 I may get bashed for this but I've noticed how women who are "chasing" guys hardly ever get positive results. As most women can get what they want by simply waiting, the more aggressive ones are oftentimes labelled as "desperate". I personally prefer a woman who gives out signals that it's ok to pursue her - and then let me do my part! Well.. I can't say that I've been 'chasing' guys (that sounds desperate) but I certainly have made the first moves in many occasions..and I have always 'succeeded' .. never had a 'no, I'm not interested, thanks anyway' ... a lot of men out there love an agressive woman. (and I don't mean overly agressive, it's always about 'dosage') My problem is not to get men.. it's to get rid of them.
Shygirl15 Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 I may get bashed for this but I've noticed how women who are "chasing" guys hardly ever get positive results. As most women can get what they want by simply waiting, the more aggressive ones are oftentimes labelled as "desperate". I personally prefer a woman who gives out signals that it's ok to pursue her - and then let me do my part! You sound insecure, Joe. You want to see all green lights before you start the chase? At this point, we might as well say it's the woman who pursued you, and you simply just wrapped up the deal. Most confident men would not mind chasing the women they want; infact they get thrilled while doing so.
Mitch_N_Fez Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 Guys can be real shy some times. Maybe he's intimidated by you and that's why he talked to the other girl. He feels less threatened by her. I say talk to the man! Introduce yourself!
Author mswonderful Posted September 13, 2008 Author Posted September 13, 2008 Guys can be real shy some times. Maybe he's intimidated by you and that's why he talked to the other girl. He feels less threatened by her. I say talk to the man! Introduce yourself! He's an older guy. Like, out of his 20s. Seriously now, am I supposed to work for an older guy too?! AHHH
Shygirl15 Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 He's an older guy. Like, out of his 20s. Seriously now, am I supposed to work for an older guy too?! AHHH Yeah why not? An older guy I am seeing (10yrs older) was too afraid to kiss me so I made the first move -thanks to tons of advice from LS on how to initiate a kiss lol-).
Lizzie60 Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 Mitch has a good point.. maybe he just 'showing' you that he IS available... who knows.. I say go with your gut feeling.. you'll know when it's the right time.. or that he's just not the right one for you..
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