TRMS93 Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 My fiance and I have been engaged for a year now and our wedding is less than three months away. While on his bachelor party, he met a girl and stayed up talking with her until 4:30 AM. At the end of the night he gave her his email address and phone number. His explanation was that he was sharing his life story and she was really interested because she is a school psychologist. However, I find it odd that not once in sharing his life story did he mention the fact that he is engaged! He maintains that he did not cheat on me, however, I am having a major trust issue with this. I feel that he has violated our commitment by not acknowledging the fact that he is engaged and by giving his contact information out and thus opening the door to future possibilities. Please help...I'm at a loss...
Ocean-Blue Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 You have a right to be upset. If this were to happen to me, I'd be a little more than "upset"...I'd be ripping him a new one. Your fiance has no business talking to this bimbo into the wee hours of the morning. That IS NOT cool and it sure as hell isn't faithful behaviour. Perhaps he didn't cheat in the classic sense of the word, but he did cross a boundary. How did you come to know of this little phone tryst?
LucreziaBorgia Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 While on his bachelor party, he met a girl and stayed up talking with her until 4:30 AM. At the end of the night he gave her his email address and phone number. His explanation was that he was sharing his life story and she was really interested because she is a school psychologist. He maintains that he did not cheat on me Please tell me you aren't buying this. I would definitely postpone the wedding until you get to the bottom of this. How did you find out?
Lizzie60 Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 I agree with LB.. postpone the wedding or do NOT get married at all.. my bet is that you'll end up heartbroken one day and will have to go through all the shyt of divorce.. just live with him first and see how it goes.
Author TRMS93 Posted September 14, 2008 Author Posted September 14, 2008 Thank you to all those of you that responded. I just wanted to be sure I wasn't over-reacting. He is still on his bachelor party and coming home this week. I don't know what to do. He has called me several times but I don't want to answer just to hear the same words of I'm sorry and it was nothing. I'm so hurt. What could he do to make this right? What should I look for? I feel like the trust is completely ruined and I don't know how to get it back or if I will ever be able to trust him again.
carhill Posted September 14, 2008 Posted September 14, 2008 How old is he? Do you know his life story? How did he come to tell you this story about the other woman, as he has not yet returned? I'm so glad I never had a bachelor party. Never understood that cr@p, anyway. Well, anyway, my advice is to put wedding on hold, get PMC and take a hard look at his true motivations, both for marriage and for being with you. It's one thing to, at bare minimum, have this kind of contact with another woman so close to your wedding, and completely another to tell you in such detail, like a soul-cleansing. He apparently has little empathy for you, IMO. Perhaps he's a great guy, and he can be, but also perhaps he is not good marriage material. There is a difference
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