spookie Posted September 11, 2008 Posted September 11, 2008 Ok, I just had to share cause I thought this was so hilarious... So I'm sitting at my desk this morning, chugging coffee and drowsily coding away, when I get a text from TT: I've been imagining your tight pussy sliding up and down my hard pole reverse cowgirl style stopping only to lick your cum off my pulsating cock... I almost fell off my chair laughing. Then I got a few more: I want to masturbate to the sound of your voice moaning telling me to fcvk you harder as you finger your clit until we simultaneously explode in ecstasy.... I want to drive to ___ blow past security run up to the 4th floor and fcvk you so hard on your desk the entire office can hear you scream... Me and Mr. Sausage thought about you the entire class period... he refused to go to sleep. I think TT's got a solid future in the porn writing industry.
tanbark813 Posted September 11, 2008 Posted September 11, 2008 When did you get a job as a programmer?
Author spookie Posted September 11, 2008 Author Posted September 11, 2008 When did you get a job as a programmer? As an actuary but all I do is program.
Enema Posted September 11, 2008 Posted September 11, 2008 Your life moves so fast. Last I remember you were spitting in an ex-boyfriends milk while you stole his weed after a B&E.
djhall Posted September 11, 2008 Posted September 11, 2008 Your life moves so fast. Last I remember you were spitting in an ex-boyfriends milk while you stole his weed after a B&E. Yeah, but you gotta admit, a relationship with Spookie wouldn't be boring!
djhall Posted September 11, 2008 Posted September 11, 2008 Ok, I just had to share cause I thought this was so hilarious... I almost fell off my chair laughing. Unfortunately, that probably wasn't the reaction he was trying for when he wrote that.
xpaperxcutx Posted September 12, 2008 Posted September 12, 2008 :lmao: How would TT feel if you told him you shared his fantasies with us?
Jilly Bean Posted September 12, 2008 Posted September 12, 2008 Spookie - do you need me to craft you some responses or are you good to go? I have had quite a bit of experience in this arena... And does he really call his cock, "Mr. Sausage"?
Green Posted September 12, 2008 Posted September 12, 2008 who is TT? He should of wrote something like " take panties off before I see you" and "I'm going to to tie you up and leave you there naked"
djhall Posted September 12, 2008 Posted September 12, 2008 Spookie - do you need me to craft you some responses or are you good to go? I have had quite a bit of experience in this arena... You do? I've never heard anyone say, "Oh, baby, text dirty to me!" (but if you want my cell # )
Jilly Bean Posted September 12, 2008 Posted September 12, 2008 You do? I've never heard anyone say, "Oh, baby, text dirty to me!" (but if you want my cell # ) LOL. My ex ex ex and I had a purely sexually-charged dynamic, and therefore spent the bulk of our time apart sending naughty texts and pics of our junk.
Green Posted September 12, 2008 Posted September 12, 2008 LOL. My ex ex ex and I had a purely sexually-charged dynamic, and therefore spent the bulk of our time apart sending naughty texts and pics of our junk. how about a link to your tacco or one that looks like it
Jilly Bean Posted September 12, 2008 Posted September 12, 2008 how about a link to your tacco or one that looks like it My taco? OMG - if you were a Red Sox fan, there would be such a great joke there. How about a link to your burrito, though?
nopainnogain Posted September 12, 2008 Posted September 12, 2008 "i want to give you a massage and then followed by a beef injection"
shadowplay Posted September 12, 2008 Posted September 12, 2008 My bf is the KING of ridiculous dirty texts. Lol. "I look forward to the moment in which my erect man meat will plunge inside of you" "I love you Shadow... and I love feeling your wet pussy surround my erect cock." " that's right, I want to take you over and hear you moan with pleasure as I slide my cock into your pussy while the warm water runs down my back and I can visualize your back glimmering with water and vacillating in a sexy manner as my unit moves within you." " I look forward to ripping off your shirt and inserting my fingers into your moist pussy. and then moving my mouth around your earlobe while stimulating the inside of your pussy. and I look forward to the moment when you slide my fingers out of your pussy and I instead slide in my throbbing cock" "I anticipate you moaning as I move up and down against you, the moisture of our bodies rising as we vacillate." Perhaps they should team up and make a porn empire?
ABrokenWing Posted September 12, 2008 Posted September 12, 2008 damn, some hot stuff in here * takes notes *
Ruby Slippers Posted September 12, 2008 Posted September 12, 2008 " that's right, I want to take you over and hear you moan with pleasure as I slide my cock into your pussy while the warm water runs down my back and I can visualize your back glimmering with water and vacillating in a sexy manner as my unit moves within you." Run-on much? I love "vacillating in a sexy manner as my unit moves within you".
shadowplay Posted September 12, 2008 Posted September 12, 2008 Run-on much? I love "vacillating in a sexy manner as my unit moves within you". I know. It sounds like something Borat would say.
Author spookie Posted September 12, 2008 Author Posted September 12, 2008 My bf is the KING of ridiculous dirty texts. Lol. "I look forward to the moment in which my erect man meat will plunge inside of you" "I love you Shadow... and I love feeling your wet pussy surround my erect cock." " that's right, I want to take you over and hear you moan with pleasure as I slide my cock into your pussy while the warm water runs down my back and I can visualize your back glimmering with water and vacillating in a sexy manner as my unit moves within you." " I look forward to ripping off your shirt and inserting my fingers into your moist pussy. and then moving my mouth around your earlobe while stimulating the inside of your pussy. and I look forward to the moment when you slide my fingers out of your pussy and I instead slide in my throbbing cock" "I anticipate you moaning as I move up and down against you, the moisture of our bodies rising as we vacillate." Perhaps they should team up and make a porn empire? LMAO. Are they serious? Do they really think this s!ht has any potential to do anything but crack us up?
jerbear Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 This is way to long for a non-qwerty phone. Why not just say: Send "Wear the green teddy" Then send "Can't wait to f..k the s..t out of you."
Ruby Slippers Posted September 13, 2008 Posted September 13, 2008 Dirty talk, when done well, is very hot, IMO. And even when it's corny, it's sweet that they're trying.
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