Should I or Shouldn't I?

[Trialbyfire]

unders, am I pulling a definition of insanity?

 

I won't make any excuses Capricciosa. I'm headed for trouble.

[Tomcat33]

unders, am I pulling a definition of insanity?

 

 

Noooooo c'mon don't get discouraged, enjoy the nice attention this guy is giving you, obvioulsy you have won his attention. You are a big girl you can guard yourself apropriately but don't squash the nice things you are experiencing with overanalizing!! Just enjoy it.

[marlena]

Great news!!! Now I am with Lishy on this one. You absloutley MUST go out with him. It will give you a good opportunity to see what he's all about and get the clarification you want. What can it hurt?

 

Just one question. When you got the roses, why didn't you call him to thank him for them?

 

I love it when men send me flowers! And open doors for me!! And light my cigarettes!! And help me with my coat... Still a romantic at heart!!

[Trialbyfire]

TC, the alarm bells are going like mad. This isn't a good idea but I can't seem to help myself. Well, I can but don't want to.

 

marlena, he called me after I put my business card thank you, under the door. I did broach the topic, as previously mentioned in one of my posts and he corrected me right away. I totally misunderstood him.

 

He had me laughing throughout the convo. He said that he would ask me out but I would probably reject him again. He kept doing it a few times, randomly injecting it into our discussion, until I was laughing so hard, I could barely speak.

[underpants]

unders, am I pulling a definition of insanity?

 

Well, not yet.

 

If he is attractive and you want to go on a date then by all means GO!!!

 

I just want you to have your wits about you. You know the elements you attract and can categorize them on your own accord.

 

I think I am sharing some of the same concern as Star. The too smooth element makes me nervous for you. There is good nervous and bad nervous. You will soon learn if he is worth further consideration beyond looks and suaveness.

 

I hope he is sincere, but I am witholding until I learn more.

 

So, be careful and learn more. Don't get swept away too fast.

 

He doesn't stand a chance really.

[marlena]

He said that he would ask me out but I would probably reject him again.

 

Why? What can it hurt? See it as going out with a peron who could become a potential friend ...or more even if it so happens.

 

You have sound judgement, TBF, so I am quite sure you can do this without tripping yourself up emotionally.

[Capricciosa]

 

I won't make any excuses Capricciosa. I'm headed for trouble.

 

I guess the extra layer of trouble is that he's your neighbour, so if he ends up being a schmuck, he will still be around (ugh). But I know how strong that magnetic pull can be, even though I don't believe its messages anymore. I guess it can't hurt to go out--but maybe do something casual, during the day, that doesn't involve wine and candlelight???

[Tomcat33]

TC, the alarm bells are going like mad. This isn't a good idea but I can't seem to help myself. Well, I can but don't want to.

 

 

 

 

Why is it not a good idea? Did you mean going out with him is not a good idea? Or thinking too much. If you meant going out with him then give me ONE good reason why it is not a good idea.

 

He likes you you like him, he has taken a very proactive approach at letting you know that, what's the problem?

[D-Lish]

The entire acting thing concerns me D-Lish. Haha...wish it was intentionally smooth but more reflex action than anything else. The word "no" seems to have become part of my vocab! Yes, I've been evaluating this since it happened. I do like my neighbour, always have liked him but as a distant friend, in the past. He's got a lot going for him. I'm in no hurry to settle down with anyone. I've learned to value my freedom a lot. No, it's not Nicholas Cage...

 

JS, while my neighbor is a great guy, the actor is intriguing. Something about him. Very charismatic, very sexy, even more so off-screen. His presence hits you like a ton of bricks. If I were in an exclusive, committed relationship with my neighbor, this wouldn't even be an issue. The door's closed when that happens, no matter what. That I'm not in a hurry to get into a relationship with anyone, is part of the problem, I think.

 

You know something?

When a feeling like that hits- how do you really deny it?

I think it kinda says something powerful.

 

Neighbour is a long term guy- Actor in the elevator is an electric guy.

Getting electrocuted and surviving is something we can tell our grand children about - something we probably all need to do. I remember when I was a kid and I stuck a knife in a wall socket... I got a great jolt- and I know now to never do it again.... but it makes for a great story.

 

If the actor dude electrifies you... I can't see how you can leave that alone. You're like me- you've been through crap with an ex husband.... dating is weird and exciting.... Experience the good things about being single! Plus, you're gorgeous- of course Mr. Actor and Mr. Neighbour are interested....

 

You don't owe anyone anything at this point...

Why pass up an "electrifying" opportunity. You're googling him... so you're wickedly intrigued.

 

Go for whatever you want sweetie!

If I stepped into an elevator with you- you can be assured, I'd have my people call your people....

[Trialbyfire]

unders, I'm trying to view this objectively as well. He probably has a girl in every port so all I can expect is to have a good time, which he can definitely provide. There's no doubt I do attract a certain element!

 

marlena, I honestly don't know if I can not become emotionally entangled. It's okay though. I've put on my big girl swimming pull-ups and are ready to dive in.

 

Capricciosa, no worries about neighbors. He's too much of a grown up for me to worry about, in that way. We all pretty much keep to ourselves, beyond pleasant chit-chat or greetings, if we come in contact.

 

TC, he reminds me of the ex, in towering confidence, wittiness and sex appeal. That's the not so good idea. We'll see if he's just like him in other ways or not.

 

Btw ladies, we're going for dinner on Thursday night. Not a date though, since I would only reject him, if he called it a date.

[Tomcat33]

He's not your ex, and the more you tell yourself that the more you will give this guy a fair go.

 

The moment you start to plant those thoughts into your head you will turn him into your ex because when things go up the creek because you sabotaged it you will say "SEE HE WAS LIKE MY EX"

 

Don't do it!!

[Trialbyfire]

You're killing me D-Lish!

 

Yes, A is incredibly electric. He makes me laugh, I make him laugh. It's exciting to feel this way again. This is so not me! I'm really looking forward to Thursday night.

 

I did talk to N. and he understands and appreciates the honesty, since we're not exclusive. He still wants to keep dating. So, we're going out Saturday night.

[Trialbyfire]

Okay, okay TC.

 

*Note to self, no self-sabotaging allowed*

[marlena]

marlena, I honestly don't know if I can not become emotionally entangled. It's okay though. I've put on my big girl swimming pull-ups and are ready to dive in.

 

 

Going out on one date,TBF, is not getting emotionally entangled. Starting a relationship with him with huge red flags waving all about you,now, that is bad.

 

But you are too smart for that. I know..

[Trialbyfire]

So true marlena, one non-date at a time!

[D-Lish]

You're killing me D-Lish!

 

Yes, A is incredibly electric. He makes me laugh, I make him laugh. It's exciting to feel this way again. This is so not me! I'm really looking forward to Thursday night.

 

I did talk to N. and he understands and appreciates the honesty, since we're not exclusive. He still wants to keep dating. So, we're going out Saturday night.

 

 

Why am I killing ya sweet thing- there are just some things in life worth experiencing and worth talking to your grand kids about.

 

YOU worry about making YOU happy- however that goes.

 

You've been through enough- do things that make you happy and make you feel sexy- why? because you are sexy- and you deserve it.

 

I screwed an NHL'r after my divorce.... at the time- I felt better- it means little to me now. Mended things at the time though.

 

Where's your head at hun?

Want to get involved in a love affair... or just an affair?

[Trialbyfire]

D-Lish, the knife to the electrical socket cracked me up, as well as the sassy tone to your post.

 

Thanks. I'm not expecting a relationship with A. We'll see how it plays out. For the interim, I'm going to relax and have some fun.

 

As for my head, it's telling me to ignore words like love, for now.

[Trialbyfire]

Before I forget, I wanted to thank everyone who's posted their views, regardless of views. It's great to have differing opinions. It helps to keep me thinking and grounded.

[Nemo]

Trialbyfire's memory isn't what it used to be. Sorry, but that's the honest truth. She was too busy being hit by a ton of pricks to take too much notice of the finer points of the conversation.

I did broach the topic, as previously mentioned in one of my posts and he corrected me right away. I totally misunderstood him.

Once again, my insight proves to be astounding. Sometimes I even surprise myself, but this wasn't one of those occasions.

 

It's important not to overthink things, and go with your hormones. Sometimes a firm derriere is just what it seems. It's not too good to be true. You don't need to probe the goods, although I would be in there at the first opportunity. When the mood is right, and the stars are aligned, naturally.

 

Anyway, I won't say that I told you so.

[Adunaphel]

Please be *extra* careful.

This guy sounds like the kind of person who could leave scars. Not in a physical way. And I have a feeling that you are picking up little red flags yourself, from your posts.

I'm not saying he must be, for sure, a womanizer, and I wish you he is on the "charming buit nice" side. But there is the potential in him to hurt you.

Just try to avoid the very common mistake to think that acknowledging that the two of you are probably going nowhere will prevent you from severe disappointment in case this happens (and you have fallen in love with him).

[Nemo]

But there is the potential in him to hurt you.

This is why it's always a good idea to have a tube of lube handy.

[Adunaphel]

This is why it's always a good idea to have a tube of lube handy.

 

I'm glad to hear that all those pink elephant trunks in your past *did* provide you with useful experience.

[Lishy]

OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGG I am sooooooooo excited, can I come too? :love:

 

Ok listen up wench, get your heart and wrap it in some nice bubble wrap and GO HAVE FUN!!!!!!!!!! (I am sewing condoms together for ya as we speak )

 

Keep it real and you will have such fun (and pressies) with this guy!!

 

I just know the more nonchalant you are with him the bigger the bouquet hahaha

 

Hey you shouldda left the flowers outside his door with a note "Hey you can do better then that" You wouldda got a Mercedes hahhaha

 

Oh how exciting!

[Trialbyfire]

Nemo...shaddup... It's becoming your last name.

 

"Mr. Shaddup, shaddup!"

 

Adunaphel, he's definitely trouble, at least to my hard-earned equilibrium. We'll see if he's trouble in other ways too.

 

Having said that, I deserve some spontaneity in my life, since it's normally a very disciplined lifestyle. We're two single people who appear to be attracted. Let's see what happens.

 

Haha...Lishy! You're hilarious. Imagine one in bubble wrap, the other in a head-to-toe condom. Makes me think of a piece of modern art which I'll call, "Desire".

[Lishy]

A piece of abstract art called .... 'Actor's Mistress'

 

You have to fess up ALL gory details ok? You must promise!