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What does it mean when a man texts you after hanging out "I had a good time with you"

Hopelessly_Devoted

By Hopelessly_Devoted,
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Hopelessly_Devoted

Hopelessly_Devoted

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I am 25 he is 32. We met on a dating site and already saw each other 3 times this week. We are both still dating others, well he is I am still looking for th sake f not getting rejection. His last relationship and my last relationship was horrible, she treated him bad and my ex treated me bad. He and I discussed taking it slow and seeing where it leads but we do know that we enjoy spending time with each other. He also told me he has his guard up.

 

We have not gone out on a "real" date. We just watch movies at my apartment and he sleeps over. So after he left today about an hour later he texts me "I had a good time with you". I responded to him via text me too, "i can't wait to see you again" he did not respond. When I read the message I thought it was good but after I got no response then I felt like it was bad. What do you think he meant or am I reading way too much into it?

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Tomcat33

Tomcat33

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Hate to be a Debbie Downer but two things:

 

1. Good luck getting him to break out of the "Im coming over for a movie" pattern I doubt he'll ever make the effort to take you out on a proper date, you are making it way too easy for him.

 

2. He told you he wants to take is slow you agreed and discussed with him and then you tell him via text "I can't wait to see you again" that spells pressure for him, that does not say I am taking it slow. You might turn him off if you pressure him

 

 

 

 

Are you guys intimate yet?

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jerbear

jerbear

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What do you think he meant or am I reading way too much into it?

 

I have to say, reading way too much into this. I've done it and my ex's have done it. To me, I would see your response as responding to my txt. More like a "Me too."

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xpaperxcutx

xpaperxcutx

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Next time, don't have him sleep over. Make an effort to have him take you out on a proper date. Having him over places the risk that you guys end up sleeping together.

 

You need to set boundaries.

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Mahatma

Mahatma

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Hate to be a Debbie Downer but two things:

 

1. Good luck getting him to break out of the "Im coming over for a movie" pattern I doubt he'll ever make the effort to take you out on a proper date, you are making it way too easy for him.

 

Me and my girlfriend started out this way... just going to eachother's places for movies. That went on for the first few dates, but now I take her out all the time. I am not sure about the sleeping over thing though. I didn't sleep over in the beginning.

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almost famous

almost famous

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He didn't text back when you texted "I can't wait to see you" because it's just a sex thing to him. Nothing else. And that's that.

 

 

I am 25 he is 32. We met on a dating site and already saw each other 3 times this week. We are both still dating others, well he is I am still looking for th sake f not getting rejection. His last relationship and my last relationship was horrible, she treated him bad and my ex treated me bad. He and I discussed taking it slow and seeing where it leads but we do know that we enjoy spending time with each other. He also told me he has his guard up.

 

We have not gone out on a "real" date. We just watch movies at my apartment and he sleeps over. So after he left today about an hour later he texts me "I had a good time with you". I responded to him via text me too, "i can't wait to see you again" he did not respond. When I read the message I thought it was good but after I got no response then I felt like it was bad. What do you think he meant or am I reading way too much into it?

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vonerik012

vonerik012

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I agree with almost famous.

 

A guy might text something like he did just to be nice, and it is only a sex thing. If he was into you completely, he would not have ignored your last text.

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almost famous

almost famous

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Yes, "I had a good time last night" is way different than "I can't wait to see you again" which is what boyfriends say to their girlfriends and vice versa. He backed off when you said a "we are together" type statement.

 

At least you know now so you don't get too emotionally invested and can take it for what it is.

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Hopelessly_Devoted

Hopelessly_Devoted

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er did have sex, i am not emotianlly invested into him at all..but he is good...i needed it after 11 years of being in a relationship with one guy...then i saw his smile and i weakend...but i needed it...i just don't want to get hurt...like if i call him fr some of his loiving and he rejects me!

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djhall

djhall

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Yes, "I had a good time last night" is way different than "I can't wait to see you again" which is what boyfriends say to their girlfriends and vice versa. He backed off when you said a "we are together" type statement.

 

At least you know now so you don't get too emotionally invested and can take it for what it is.

 

Wait a minute... if he texts her she has to text him back or she isn't into him, amd when she texts him back he has to text her back or he isn't into her, and when she gets his text she has to text him back again or???

 

Unless you two want to spend the rest of your lives texting each other, someone is going to stop responding sometime. He said he had a good time and she said she was looking forward to doing it again... he reached out, she reciprocated, things are relatively balanced, the last communication was a statement that did not require a response... where is the problem here?

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djhall

djhall

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It seems like he hasn't contacted her all day after the text, that's the problem - unless he's contacted her by now.

And why is that a problem? Why did her text require a response?

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vonerik012

vonerik012

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Because "I had a good time" is far different from "I can't wait to see you again".

 

Any man with a little interest would respond with "me too". No man with interest would just let that go.

 

In the mans mind, if he responded to the "I can't wait to see you again", he might have been afraid she would respond again, and text "when" or "how is tonight" etc. The guy just came, and is not very interested until he has to again.

 

Men often times feel they have to have some response after sex, so they might just send the obligatory "I had a good time". If she did not want another text, she would have just said "me too".

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Hopelessly_Devoted

Hopelessly_Devoted

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He did give me a call later, but I was alseep, and then he texted me twice sayin "u there?" and "its ok that you have another date tonight"

 

He is assuming because I did not answer the phone that I am on a date because guys who I have been talking to prior to meet him still call me...

 

I am just going to talk to him about it and see what happens...when he left my house yesterday he took all the condoms and said "i just counted them"

 

He gives me mixed feelings, like for example he asked me if we were exclusive just going to see one another, yet he says its ok for me to date because he can't stop me. Damn I feel so juvenile.

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Balthazar

Balthazar

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The fact that he didn't respond is not good at all.

 

If he was interested, he would have got back to her, either immediately or a while later.

 

I hope we are proved wrong, but I don't think this guy is interested.

 

CHeers,

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vonerik012

vonerik012

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He did give me a call later, but I was alseep, and then he texted me twice sayin "u there?" and "its ok that you have another date tonight"

 

He is assuming because I did not answer the phone that I am on a date because guys who I have been talking to prior to meet him still call me...

 

I am just going to talk to him about it and see what happens...when he left my house yesterday he took all the condoms and said "i just counted them"

 

He gives me mixed feelings, like for example he asked me if we were exclusive just going to see one another, yet he says its ok for me to date because he can't stop me. Damn I feel so juvenile.

 

Hopelessly,

 

Men can still be possessive even if it is just a FWB situation. Do you want a relationship with him?

 

Did you meet him online? It seems he wanted to have his options open (thus he did not respond in a timely manner), and then when he had nothing else to do, or decided he wanted some, he called you late at night.

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Hopelessly_Devoted

Hopelessly_Devoted

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We met online, I was the one he mentioned FWB because I do not want to get hurt again and I enjoy the fact that you can be affectionate and intimate with someone and with no drama....

 

he asked me what if I fall in love with him or he falls in love with me, I did not know how to respond.

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vonerik012

vonerik012

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Ok, you met online, he just came over, and you started sleeping together.

 

Well chances are he is still chatting with other women to do the same thing. If it does not pan out, then he contacts you late at night.

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Lucky_One

Lucky_One

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He took condoms and counted them. He assumed that you were on a date.

 

He distrusts you already. And you have just met him. He thinks that you will f**k any guy in sight?

 

Danger, Will Robinson. He may have been good in bed, but he doesn't sound good for anything else.

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Walk

Walk

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I really think you're reading way too much into a text message. He didn't have a reason to respond to the 'can't wait to see you' part. Just like djhall was saying.

 

You two are FWBs. Nothing more at this point. You both agreed you'd take it slow, and you both understand each of you are free to date others. So what is the problem?

 

Is it that you really want mroe from the relationship but you're afraid to ask for it? Are you hoping he breaks the FWB standoff?

 

I don't see an issue with anything you described (except counting condoms) that would maek me concerned that he wasn't interested. He sounds very interested. But to me, it sounds like you want a relationship with this guy and that is what has you tied into knots.

 

What was with teh counting condoms thing anyway? Sounded like a bad joke with jealous overtones.

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