journey1 Posted September 5, 2008 Posted September 5, 2008 Hi everyone: I hate to be a downer, I am really doing well, for me, in comparison to my emotional well being 6 weeks ago! I have since learned to laugh, have fun and find distractions. Now that I am working again (teacher) I go almost 6 hours without him on the brain.... but in the morning when I wake up, I noticed that I am missing him. Perhaps I am having dreams and they are making me sad and when I awake, I feel immensly depressed. You know how a nightmare is so convincing and can shake you for hours after you awaken??? Well, this is the sort of feeling I have each morning, and it ruins my morning before work, I get really sad. I eventually see my students and snap out of it!!! I think I miss sleeping with someone and having his arms wrapped around me all night!!! I also find that after a night out with my friends ---even if it was fun, I miss him so deeply, even after a night with another guy , I miss the ex so much more. Am I healing or am I still in mourning/denial?? Do you have a certain time of day that reminds you and hurts you? If so what do you do??
Melrapuo Posted September 5, 2008 Posted September 5, 2008 My school schedule leaves a lot of time in the morning to do nothing. Whenever I wake up, my heart is usually racing because I realize that I'm not with her anymore. I usually have to turn on the radio at night and in the morning to calm myself down so I can go to sleep/wake up. Hoping that it will stop over time.
seminoles84 Posted September 5, 2008 Posted September 5, 2008 My school schedule leaves a lot of time in the morning to do nothing. Whenever I wake up, my heart is usually racing because I realize that I'm not with her anymore. I usually have to turn on the radio at night and in the morning to calm myself down so I can go to sleep/wake up. Hoping that it will stop over time. We all go through it. It's part of the process. My mornings are always the worst. I haven't found the cure to get over it yet though. I'm thinking if I can just get myself up and run a mile it would help. I already go to the gym but I need something for early in the morning. The only thing that keeps me from doing something stupid in the morning (texting, calling, emailing, ect..) is getting on here straight away and reading advice!
citizen67 Posted September 6, 2008 Posted September 6, 2008 Mornings are bad for me too. I am typically a good sleeper, but I've been waking up b4 the alarm while its still dark and can't seem to stop thinking about him, us, them. It sucks
seminoles84 Posted September 6, 2008 Posted September 6, 2008 Normally nighttime is the hardest for people. At night we are forced to be alone with our thoughts. I don't know. For me night time is far and between as far as being hard for me. I RARELY have a good morning..
ahhhchooo Posted September 6, 2008 Posted September 6, 2008 Late at night for sure. But I'm learning to be without her, realising I as much as I'd love to have her back, really don't need her back. Things are looking brighter.
Jono Posted September 6, 2008 Posted September 6, 2008 Mornings are bad, it's a symptom of depression. I'm not 100% on this but I've heard it has to do with your subconsious processing everything while you sleep so you wake up with the issue on your mind. She's definatley the first thing I think about every morning when I wake up. F-ck it sux.
MusicChick24 Posted September 6, 2008 Posted September 6, 2008 Night time is usually bad for me. Because that's when I have the most time to think...that's when I'm online and I can see him there...and when he wants to contact me. In the morning luckily I'm not awake enough to know my own name much less his lol. But I know what it's like to wake up and immediately remember I'm single!
0hpenelope Posted September 8, 2008 Posted September 8, 2008 Do you have a certain time of day that reminds you and hurts you? If so what do you do?? It used to be at night, but now not so much. I used to dream about him too, but I learned that the last thing that I think about is usually the basis of whatever dream I have. So I guess that means that I've been thinking about him a lot less than I thought I have. I'm immensely grateful for that. Although when I'm on campus at my university, I get anxious because I don't want to be reminded by anything over there. Unavoidable circumstances, though. I just learned how to deal with it somehow. Grinned and bore it, pretty much. And the memories are starting to recede slowly. Thank goodness..
Karma101 Posted September 8, 2008 Posted September 8, 2008 I find myself waking up over and over again throughout the night with that anxious feeling in my chest. Mornings are really bad. We would always get up a bit early just so we could lay in bed together for a bit in the AM and cuddle before getting up.
watermeloncandy Posted September 8, 2008 Posted September 8, 2008 first thing in the morning i wake up and realize once again this isn't a nightmare, but reality... when i'm driving... when i am lying in bed trying to fall asleep... and whenever else my mind isnt occupied with something else....(which is most of the time...)
Dazed & Confused Posted September 8, 2008 Posted September 8, 2008 well it's been about 6-7 months since i split and i got to say its probably only the evenings where i really miss her - well i dont really think her but just company. I think when your together you take for granted time in the evening, watching films, generally talking etc.. Films aren't quite the same watched alone, and on a cold night with no-one to snuggle up with. Although it was my decision to leave, I know I'm not over her and certainly not rushing out to find someone just to fill the boredom.
nickelinadime Posted September 8, 2008 Posted September 8, 2008 Later at night is deffinitely the worst for me. During most of my classes, I'm fine. I have so little time to prepare in the morning and think about the day, it's not that bad, but when I have free time at work or later at night, that's when it's bad.
BleuStar Posted September 9, 2008 Posted September 9, 2008 Being at work is the hardest time for me. He used to stop by and visit me every time I was there. I would look out the window and get excited when I saw him pull in. But that's one of the main reasons I broke up with him, because it seemed the only time I saw him was when I was at work. So that's how I make myself feel better, by reminding myself that he didn't want to make time for me on his days off.
xxxheartbrokenxxx Posted September 9, 2008 Posted September 9, 2008 Mornings are the worst - my xMM is the first thing I think of when I wake up its so depressing. Realizing he aint here anymore & probably aint ever gonna come back. And the beginning of yet another day of him not contacting me.
audrey_1 Posted September 9, 2008 Posted September 9, 2008 Update: Right now, all the time. I've gotten past the sad phase fairly quickly and moved into the anger phase. But not really angry with him, more with me for being duped. No more heart before intellect anymore for this chica.
FloridaE46 Posted September 9, 2008 Posted September 9, 2008 seems i start to dream about her around 4 AM, so the mornings suck.. then around 1:30 i start to get down... i wonder if she feels the same way, or even sad at all
Beee Posted September 10, 2008 Posted September 10, 2008 Worst time for me has to be first thing in the morning, when I wake up and realise its all still real and not just a bad dream.... and realise I can't just turn round and cuddle him. When we first broke up I used to wake up to thoughts of pain and lonelyness.... I have forced myself to go out and do things and this has helped, but it doesn't change my mornings. I still wake up, every single morning, and miss him. I miss his skin against mine and miss being able to turn around and cuddle him.... I look forward to the day I will wake up and think of something new... but for now I just miss him so much and wish I could wake up with him again.
HopeDiesLast Posted September 10, 2008 Posted September 10, 2008 Mornings are the worst. Seems to be the consensis around here. I miss the phone calls (we never lived together) i miss the wake up calls when he went to work before me. i wake up and realize its for real this time and it kills me- everyday. I thought at 3 months i'd be over this, and i'm not. Its so hard. so damn hard to give up on someone who was so special to you.
stray_cat Posted September 10, 2008 Posted September 10, 2008 the hardest was definitely the mornings. obviously its because we wake up to a life that is no longer the same. during the time when my STBXH just dropped the bomb, i cry first thing in the morning it was just awful. as soon as i open my eyes i am filled with unbearable sadness and heartache i would not even wish it to my worst enemy. sometimes i even wish i don't wake up anymore. but it does get easier over time. that was 2½ months ago and now i can say i feel better. i'm already sleeping well and no longer wake up feeling like i can't go on with my life.
Angel1111 Posted September 10, 2008 Posted September 10, 2008 I used to hate going to bed at night because it made me feel the lonliest. Now I don't really have bad days - except sometimes right before a long holiday weekend or something. I think that's more of a learned response than anything though. I have reached a point where I'm finally so content with being alone that it would actually bother me to have someone in my life. So, any new guy will have to be pretty special if my fun is going to be interrupted. I'm just enjoying myself too much. Yes, you'll get there someday.
RogueAC Posted September 10, 2008 Posted September 10, 2008 In the beginning, mornings were definitely the most difficult. Now, I find it occasionally hits when I am doing things that I know the ex would also enjoy or after a really fun day/night with friends.
alwayssme Posted October 6, 2008 Posted October 6, 2008 unfortunately it hurts all the time, but the mornings are the worst! I still can't beleive this is for real, and the worst part about it is I dream we get back together. We have broken up before and would always get back within 2-3 days and now its been over 2 months. I still can't beleive it's over. I wish it was all a bad dream, but my reality sucks. I guess at night I'm so sedated from the pain I have been feeling all day that I feel sleepy. Being broken-hearted is a constant pain that won't seem to go away no matter what
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