candykisses Posted September 5, 2008 Posted September 5, 2008 I am wondering about something and would like to get some opinions. If you were dating somone for about 3 years, how would you spend Christmas and New Years Eve? Would you spend it visiting your mom with your kids one year and then the next year go skiing alone with your kids? Then spend New Years Eve alone? If you have been dating for 3 years wouldn't you be spending it together instead of apart, regardless if there are kids involved or not?
audrey_1 Posted September 5, 2008 Posted September 5, 2008 I am wondering about something and would like to get some opinions. If you were dating somone for about 3 years, how would you spend Christmas and New Years Eve? Would you spend it visiting your mom with your kids one year and then the next year go skiing alone with your kids? Then spend New Years Eve alone? If you have been dating for 3 years wouldn't you be spending it together instead of apart, regardless if there are kids involved or not? Depends on what works for you. Is this an ongoing discussion with your SO?
Author candykisses Posted September 5, 2008 Author Posted September 5, 2008 Well the past 2 christmas holidays and last new years eve was spend seperated. One year he spent it with his kids and a friend of his son's and his dad and they went skiing. This last year he spent it with his kids and went to his moms but was back home for New Years Eve. He has told me that he doesn't want to get married again, I however am undecided. So with both of these "issues" I feel that this is a deadend relationship but I care for him alot. Just trying to figure out where I fit in or if I even do?
audrey_1 Posted September 5, 2008 Posted September 5, 2008 Well the past 2 christmas holidays and last new years eve was spend seperated. One year he spent it with his kids and a friend of his son's and his dad and they went skiing. This last year he spent it with his kids and went to his moms but was back home for New Years Eve. He has told me that he doesn't want to get married again, I however am undecided. So with both of these "issues" I feel that this is a deadend relationship but I care for him alot. Just trying to figure out where I fit in or if I even do? Why focus on the holidays? How is your relationship the rest of the time?
Author candykisses Posted September 5, 2008 Author Posted September 5, 2008 It seems to be good. He is a shy and anti social type of guy and he is always talking about a lady he sees at work. He talks about how they have a connection, and they always smile and wave to one another and talk about personal things, their kids and what not. I have asked him how many times they have talked and he has told me only a couple of times. So my radar goes off, thinking if you have only talked a couple of times, that would make her somewhat of a stranger to him but then why talk about personal stuff? I guess I am just seeing some things about our relationship and just wondering if I want to invest anymore time especially with him sharing personal things another woman and then him wanting to spend the holidays alone or at least away from me.
rod_in_gtown Posted September 5, 2008 Posted September 5, 2008 somehow it doesn't sound to me like the two of you are dating... at least in his eyes. since he's telling you of a connection he thinks he has with a girl at work. are you sure you guys aren't just Friends with Benefits?
Author candykisses Posted September 5, 2008 Author Posted September 5, 2008 100% sure, he introduces me to his co workers and other friends as his girlfriend and has done so for at least a couple of years now. I have been wondering if he wants to end it and telling me of his connection with this other lady as an out for him? Trying to let me down easy, but not realizing that telling me about this other lady would upset me even more.
xpaperxcutx Posted September 5, 2008 Posted September 5, 2008 Why did he felt he needed to tell you about the woman from work? If he values his relationship with you then he wouldn't even need to bring up the subject or even take notice of the fact that another woman is being flirtatious with him. The holiday subject shouldn't be a big concern for you. It sounds like he has alot of affections for his children and family that he would choose to spend time with his family during the holidays. Has he asked for you to go home with him for the holidays and meet his parents? If you guys have dated for 3 years, then this topic is pretty much redundant.
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