Crazy ex girlfriend still in the picture and much more

[MonroeVonOh]

I am not so much together with him now as one final blow of fighting was enough for me and I can't handle anymore. " My guy " and I had been dating for 7 months, I am 22 and he is 29 but he looks like such a baby. He has a young son with some woman , or girl rather and that has caused a lot of problems as well , they had been together off and on for 7 years, there have been a few boyfriends and girlfriends since for them so Im not certain how they really feel about eachother at this point. They have tried to work things out for the sake of their son but I guess nothing has worked and they both moved on. I think I am his 3rd girlfriend since the split from his 7 year itch. He is a really great person deep down but he does have a drinking problem and I also tend to drink more being around him. He has gone through quite a bit in his lifetime and I think it has really taken a toll on him. He was raised by his father , poor with his three brothers and his dad also drank and had a tendancy to tell the boys that women are no good. His mom left a long time ago and has since re-married and for the last few years or so has been in her sons lives. I have met both sides of the family. His brothers also drink to and have been known to get vilolent ( well one of them as far as I know) while drinking. We met at school , within the first few weeks of us getting together , he managed to get me kicked out of my sisters place where I was staying due to drinking. I was watching her place as she was away , i invited him over and by the end of the night he was slamming doors and crying on my sisters floor and waking up the landlord , he was drunk. He has always been jealous and possessive and at the beginning i felt flattered to get that much attention but in time it got a bit much when I would talk to a guy at school about something and he would get upset. I haven't been the best and I admit I flirted a few times and I feel bad for that but I have never cheated on him or done anything that wrong to make him as jealous as he is and to make comments all the time like " where are you going" " what are you doing" if I don't get back to him online in a matter of seconds he will call my house over and over again and so on and so forth. He has called me names and jabbed at personal things I have told him just to hurt me, I have done the same thing I am no better. we fight all the time and take jabs at eachother to get under the others skin, we are both very emotional and sensitive people. We have gotten really rough with eachother a few times. The other night was the worst and thats what ended everything. He tends to keep in contact with his " babys momma" through text and phone call and although for the most part its about their son , I have talked to her and have seen texts that he messages her and tell her he misses her when things aren't working out with him and I or him and past girlfriends. He is also wanting me to move into his place in the country , i dont drive , ill be stuck there and I think thats what he wants, he also wants me to have his baby only after 7 months , 7 months of fighting. His ex told me that he said that to her and others in a matter of weeks that he wanted them to have his kid. He also says " baby , im sorry I love you " after he has done something wrong , and then he does something wrong again only to say " baby , im sorry i love you" there have been a lot of family drama, drama with him and I and drama with him and I and his ex as I feel like I am in constant competition with her , it makes me feel ugly and it really messes with my head. There have been wonderful times , just as many as not. He makes me laugh and I know he really does care he has just been hurt so much and the drinking doesn't help. He is messed up and all he wants is a family , for something to work out and to be happy , but he also doesn't seem to take a first step into getting there either. and also , his ex will never ever go away as they have a son together she is no better than him most times as well they are always fighting through text and phone right in front of me. I told him it was over after the other night when things got really bad, I am done with the name calling and taking jabs at eachother and the ex and everything else. also now I am embarrassed to show my face around his family because of what happened , we fought in their home waking them up at 5am , drinking. I know I know, I am getting help for my drinking now. It did get worse being with him though but still . He keeps messaging and we have talked since online , he says he misses me and loves me and that he wants to change and that Im the one and that he can't stop thinking about me and asking me why i dont believe him and calling me baby. I basically told him we are both not ready to be in a relationship, I am ebarrassed about what happened in front of his family, and i can't handle the ex and her always being there and them talking about other things other then their son and so on and I have major doubts that he has said this stuff to other women trying and saying anything he can to make them stay. I dont feel special to him all the time. I feel that I am just one of them, and there will be many after me. But then I think maybe not, Im so lost here. The ex also makes threats about him not seeing his son and that she is going to move away, and also she has made comments about me and how I look and how she is so much better than me in so many words, I have fought back, but her comments still sting. I find myself getting involved in such a crazy situation and Im not used to who I am becoming with him. I feel like a Jerry springer case. I do miss him though and there was something different with us , but I just dont know what to do anymore. I need to focus on me, but I can't stop thinking about him, Im trying to not talk to him as much or give in . Do you think he is worth it ? Is he just a trapped scared boy that can't get over his past so he drinks to cope and turns nasty. He has so much on his plate right now with a lot of things and Im trying to be there for him , but if you love someone you dont call them names do you ? I dont know I am so lost, I feel in my gut that I should just let him go , but then I think ill regret it and everything else. I am stuck. Is this type worth it ? What is this type anyhow ?

[Shygirl15]

Monroe, that kind of writing will not get you anywhere. Very long post, no paragraphs etc, it's just too much.