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"Spanx" can kill the mood can't they???


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Posted

I am going as a guest to a wedding with a guy I like (long distance guy)- that I met last month. He's from here- and is coming home that weekend and asked me to go as his date. I said yes of course- weddings are fun! It will give us a chance to get to know one another as well.

 

DILEMMA: Girls- you all know what spanx are. Those ever ugly but extremely awesome shapers that give your outfits that much of an edge.

I have this awesome dress I bought- it's very hip and cute, but somewhat form fitted in some areas.

 

Okay- I am only 120lbs... and don't actually need the spanx I guess- but they just hide ANY imperfection, give my bum a nice little lift, and slim out my hips that I am always conscious of.

 

These spanx go from under the boobs- down to my mid thigh. It's all good- they go perfect under the outfit.

 

BUT- what happens if we dance- will he feel it on my back?

What if things get frisky after the wedding.... I'm not going to get undressed and show off my slim-shady-shaper!!!

 

We're staying at his friend's place- so I will have to have some sort of secret plan in place to hide myrtle the girdle before we make out.

I was thinking I could actually bring sweet panties and hide them in my purse and ditch the spanx in the bathroom at the reception before going home. :lmao:

 

It's okay- I owned a lingerie store- I still have spanx in packages in my basement so it's not a big monetary loss.

 

What should I do???

I need a plan.

Girls- I need your help.

Posted

Leave it at home, D.

 

Even with the planning, I can picture him trying to finger you under the table and your cover being blown.

 

With your figure, gadgets like this are SO not needed, babe.

Posted

LOL!

 

The ONLY time I ever wore Spanx was to my high school reunion...and I was freakishly paranoid ALL night long that someone would touch me and feel it underneath my dress.

 

Unless you plan on carrying a BIG purse (and who does that to a wedding?) to take it off right before you leave the event, or plan on going straight home to run into the bathroom to rip it off, I'd leave it at home. Even under the circumstances I described, any spontaneous moment will be ruined. And we don't want that, now do we??

 

I don't think every guy reacts the way Daniel Cleaver in BJD did... :laugh:

Posted
Leave it at home, D.

 

Even with the planning, I can picture him trying to finger you under the table and your cover being blown.

 

With your figure, gadgets like this are SO not needed, babe.

 

Okay, I've either been hanging around the wrong women, or I've been seriously underestimating what I could get away with on a date!

Posted

Frankly, we women seem to forget that most guys are just thrilled at the thought of a beautiful women having sex with them, that we get hung up on stuff like this.

 

If it makes YOU feel sexier and YOU like it, then go for it. You could always coyly undress elsewhere before hopping into bed if it concerns you that much.

 

I've worn these things before and no, they blend really well and aren't easy to feel under the clothes.

 

Seriously, I think worrying about this stuff is what makes guys roll their eyes at us silly gals. :)

Posted
Okay, I've either been hanging around the wrong women, or I've been seriously underestimating what I could get away with on a date!

 

That's what I was just thinking.

  • Author
Posted
Leave it at home, D.

 

Even with the planning, I can picture him trying to finger you under the table and your cover being blown.

 

With your figure, gadgets like this are SO not needed, babe.

 

OMG... finger me under the table...:confused: There is an opening though...lol- jk.

 

Perhaps there is the possibility he could touch my thigh, and be like WTF is that??

 

I'd be carrying a small purse- with a tiny g-string in it.

The spanxsters would go in the garbage before I left. lol.

 

The dancing part does bug me- I don't want him feeling it!

 

Man- I used to sell spanx like crazy at my store- so many brides (and tiny perfect ones at that) would wear them under their dress.

 

Okay- I ditch the spanx and hit the treadmill a little harder than usual.

It's a great dress (not slutty)... but hugging.

 

My friend went home drunk early and passed out at my place one night on my couch- the rest of us came home with a little bit of a party coming with us and she was lying with her ass facing us- her skirt hiked up around her waist and her spanx in full beautiful view. Priceless. I love her.

Posted
Perhaps there is the possibility he could touch my thigh, and be like WTF is that??

 

You could tell him it's a garter OR a gun holster.

Posted
You could tell him it's a garter OR a gun holster.

 

LOL

 

Honestly, coming from a man's perspective, the only thing that would be bothersome about the spanx is removing the damn thing if things did get hot and heavy.

Us guys prefer easy access ;)

Posted

Actually, a good pair of *gasp* pantyhose should do the trick! Yes, I do hate them BUT if you're trying to ummm do a little shaping it would be less obvious than a shaper.

  • Author
Posted
You could tell him it's a garter OR a gun holster.

 

haha:lmao:

knowing I might have a gun could keep that wandering vagina seeking finger away better than the likes of a butter knife.

Posted
haha:lmao:

knowing I might have a gun could keep that wandering vagina seeking finger away better than the likes of a butter knife.

 

Exactly. Though I am a big fan of butter knives.

 

You've heard of heat-seeking missiles?

 

This is the vagina-seeking finger deterrent. Weaponry.

 

Just make sure you well groom the patch. If the dress is that tight, you don't want to be tufting.

Posted
Actually, a good pair of *gasp* pantyhose should do the trick! Yes, I do hate them BUT if you're trying to ummm do a little shaping it would be less obvious than a shaper.

 

Ew, no. I don't do hose. Ever.

 

:laugh:

Posted
Exactly. Though I am a big fan of butter knives.

 

You've heard of heat-seeking missiles?

 

This is the vagina-seeking finger deterrent. Weaponry.

 

Just make sure you well groom the patch. If the dress is that tight, you don't want to be tufting.

 

:lmao: Classic!

 

(Who "tufts" these days, though? :confused:)

Posted
:lmao: Classic!

 

(Who "tufts" these days, though? :confused:)

 

Well, it was just a general commentary and advice for the public. I am more than sure that D keeps herself high and tight.

 

I'm pretty much lasered off below, except for the patch at the top. Baller liked me to keep it like a cotton tail (I think he had some kind of rodent fetish or cotton ball issue). But, I fear it may have been tuftable in the wrong outfit!

 

Just advising from (near) experience for my sisters.

  • Author
Posted
Ew, no. I don't do hose. Ever.

 

:laugh:

 

Agreed... I banned hose a long time ago- even in winter.

 

And there is no 70's bush happening here JB...lol.

I got used to doing the full "everything gone waxing torture" when I was actively shooting. That entailed getting up on the table in a very embarrassing submissive pose.

 

Sometimes I look down and think "Oh my god I am a 10 year old girl"...

Posted

I think this post is funny.

 

I'm trimmed, yet natural (no waxing there, thanks), wear Spanx on occasion and even wear pantyhose to accentuate my 5'10" legs...

 

How on earth do I keep getting laid??? :laugh:

Posted
Agreed... I banned hose a long time ago- even in winter.

 

And there is no 70's bush happening here JB...lol.

I got used to doing the full "everything gone waxing torture" when I was actively shooting. That entailed getting up on the table in a very embarrassing submissive pose.

 

Sometimes I look down and think "Oh my god I am a 10 year old girl"...

 

I like to wear tights with a mini-skirt in winter. But, I do like to cut the crotch out. It's come in handy... ;)

 

You should get it lasered. I did, and I am SO glad I did! I just left a little at the top for personal styling. lol

Posted

I got mine lasered too... But after 3 years, it's starting to grow back. Grr.

Posted
I got mine lasered too... But after 3 years, it's starting to grow back. Grr.

 

Well, beat the bush back, girl! Go for another weed whacking, I say!

  • Author
Posted

really? I thought lasering was permanent!

I have been thinking about it....

 

Crest- you get laid because you are 5'10" and have those hot legs!

Do you ever wear the garter with the hose? They are back in style big time!

Posted
I think this post is funny.

 

I'm trimmed, yet natural (no waxing there, thanks), wear Spanx on occasion and even wear pantyhose to accentuate my 5'10" legs...

 

How on earth do I keep getting laid??? :laugh:

 

Are your legs 5'10", or all of you? lol

 

Define "trimmed but natural".

Posted
really? I thought lasering was permanent!

I have been thinking about it....

 

Nope. "Permanent" in laser-speak means one-year. One-year there was NOTHIN' there. Now it's at 50%.

 

But it was still worth the expense for that time period, fo shizzle.

Posted
Okay, I've either been hanging around the wrong women, or I've been seriously underestimating what I could get away with on a date!

 

I second THAT brother!

Posted
I like to wear tights with a mini-skirt in winter.

 

Ooh! This is my uniform!

 

I wax regularly when Im in a relationship but otherwise I just shave it every now and then. It stops me from having one night stands, thats for sure!

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