whattothink Posted September 4, 2008 Posted September 4, 2008 Okay, all, I need your opinion, especially those who are familiar with the eharmony concept. When a man puts as one of his "must-haves" attractivness and one of his "can't stands" overweight does this make hime shallow? I, like most, feel that physical attraction is very important. If the man has seen my photographs (that are very up-to-date) does that mean that I "pass" those two categories? Just needing some thoughts and would LOVE your help!
Jilly Bean Posted September 4, 2008 Posted September 4, 2008 I am currently an eharmony member. I hope to be a poster child one day. I don't think it makes him shallow, I think it makes him human. Few people actively seek overweight partners. It's no different than him ticking he doesn't want someone who does drugs. I find the guys who tick off good personal hygiene is funny. Makes me wonder what kinds of women they meet that don't wash. lol
johan Posted September 4, 2008 Posted September 4, 2008 I find the guys who tick off good personal hygiene is funny. Makes me wonder what kinds of women they meet that don't wash. lol What, on the other hand, about the guys who don't check it? I guess you can assume they don't mind dirty girls. I would think it's pretty much a must-check, just because it's there.
Author whattothink Posted September 4, 2008 Author Posted September 4, 2008 I agree with your comment about cleanliness...makes ya wonder! Some of them make me giggle, does anyone really want someone who lies, cheats, and have outside a marriage? I have had pretty good luck with eharmony and met some great people that helped me get over my fear of "only creeps" being online.
Author whattothink Posted September 4, 2008 Author Posted September 4, 2008 I am currently an eharmony member. I hope to be a poster child one day. Oh, and Jilly, I hope to see you on a commercial someday!!!
Jilly Bean Posted September 4, 2008 Posted September 4, 2008 I agree with your comment about cleanliness...makes ya wonder! Some of them make me giggle, does anyone really want someone who lies, cheats, and have outside a marriage? I have had pretty good luck with eharmony and met some great people that helped me get over my fear of "only creeps" being online. Yes, I find the men to be very legitimately focused on LTR's and marriage. Not the looking for hookup types at all. What you would call a true, nice guy.
Jilly Bean Posted September 4, 2008 Posted September 4, 2008 Oh, and Jilly, I hope to see you on a commercial someday!!! Thanks, you too!
Crestfallen_KH Posted September 4, 2008 Posted September 4, 2008 Honestly, I like it when people are just honest about what they want. Short profiles, generic statements and types who seem to be open to "meeting anyone" are the types I tend to avoid. We all have our preferences. Those preferences don't make us shallow. Heck, I'm 5'10" and I prefer a taller guy. I've been told that makes me shallow, but I don't care. I also don't want someone who does drugs, has 3 kids or can't spell or string a sentence together. I know what I want, and I tend to think I get better results. Why waste your time, particularly on a paid site, to meet people just to meet people? Meet who you want to meet.
rod_in_gtown Posted September 4, 2008 Posted September 4, 2008 I tried eHarmony for about a year when I got divorced... didn't find it worked out for me very well.. I think I blame the fact that I lived pretty far outside of the beltway (like 30 miles). I'm a little weary of trying it again... I think I'm in a pretty good place where I could want a serious relationship... I wonder. Back to the OP question. I wouldn't necessarily think the person is shallow, but rather know what they want. If they have that in their profile and they contacted you (I'm assuming this is the case) then it probably means he doesn't think you're overweight. (I think you're asking because you think you're outside your ideal weight). I'm making a lot of assumptions since you didn't really state why you're asking.
Author whattothink Posted September 4, 2008 Author Posted September 4, 2008 Thanks for your feedback. I am a little outside my "ideal" body weight, but am more comfortable with myself than I have ever been. Unfortunately, I'll never been a size 2, but I have now accepted a size 12. I've come a long way with accepting my body; I guess I still struggle with my face. I know, I know, develop confidence! I'm working on it!!!
Tomcat33 Posted September 4, 2008 Posted September 4, 2008 What are the guys like on there? The guys in the commercials are pretty hot a couple of them. Are there decent looking dudes on there or are they all dweebs?
jerbear Posted September 4, 2008 Posted September 4, 2008 What are the guys like on there? The guys in the commercials are pretty hot a couple of them. Are there decent looking dudes on there or are they all dweebs? Both! I was on it and some friends were on it also. The same goes with the women some are decent looking and some are dweebettes.
jerbear Posted September 4, 2008 Posted September 4, 2008 Okay, all, I need your opinion, especially those who are familiar with the eharmony concept. When a man puts as one of his "must-haves" attractivness and one of his "can't stands" overweight does this make hime shallow? I, like most, feel that physical attraction is very important. If the man has seen my photographs (that are very up-to-date) does that mean that I "pass" those two categories? Just needing some thoughts and would LOVE your help! I don't speak for every man or know their situations. I do have to admit that I'm not the photogenic type and of the 100 pictures of me, about 4 are good and the 96... well just say my license picture looks better. :lmao: Based on my own views of photos, if she looks decent, goofy, not very photogenic is fine with me. That said I'll move on. After I see a woman's photographs and it progressed to stands and can't stands, to me it means you've passed. Now the big part is turning that into a physical meeting, after the meeting, the physical attraction might not be there.
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