sao2 Posted September 3, 2008 Posted September 3, 2008 So we saw each other this weekend. Wow, it was intense. We have been broken up for a year and haven't really had much contact in that time. We recently began talking again. By chance we both happened to be visiting NYC this past weekend and we met up for a few hours. Before we knew it 5 hours had passed. The feelings were still there for both of us. We have such chemistry it is scary. After I got home she called me. We talked for two hours about nothing in particular. We have both accepted that the feelings between us can not be denied. We are not "together" or "not together". We just accept that these feelings exist and prevent us from moving on. We also accept that no contact is not really working for either of us. We both were also surprised that the other was still just as stuck. What this all means I don't know and to be honest I am not ready to jump back in. It just really felt great to be around her again.
sultry33 Posted September 3, 2008 Posted September 3, 2008 So we saw each other this weekend. Wow, it was intense. We have been broken up for a year and haven't really had much contact in that time. We recently began talking again. By chance we both happened to be visiting NYC this past weekend and we met up for a few hours. Before we knew it 5 hours had passed. The feelings were still there for both of us. We have such chemistry it is scary. After I got home she called me. We talked for two hours about nothing in particular. We have both accepted that the feelings between us can not be denied. We are not "together" or "not together". We just accept that these feelings exist and prevent us from moving on. We also accept that no contact is not really working for either of us. We both were also surprised that the other was still just as stuck. What this all means I don't know and to be honest I am not ready to jump back in. It just really felt great to be around her again. right wih you on this, this is exactly how it is with my ex its like no matter how much time has passed we still fit together.. he said that.. and yes i agree good luck to you
Biker2007 Posted September 3, 2008 Posted September 3, 2008 Sao, What broke you up the first time around? Where do you see things going between you and your Ex in the future? Whatever happens, sounds like you have a friend again in your Ex. Good luck!
Author sao2 Posted September 5, 2008 Author Posted September 5, 2008 We broke up because we were both in terribly stressful situations for us that neither of us handled very well. These situations were independent of the relationship but were very much a part of our lives. Both of these situations have changed. In a sense, for a while, we were doing a SUPER long distance relationship in which even the simplest connection between us was not so simple. Phone was expensive and unreliable. Email on her end was unreliable. Snail mail could not be counted on to arrive and if it did it would often take months. We have both recently moved into better situations and yet we still find ourselves a thousand miles apart. But now simple communication like phone, email, and snail mail are possible and reliable. I don't know where I see this going. I think part of the problem in the past was that I tried to see where it was going and to be honest I can't see. Our lives are on different trajectories and we both see that. Is it possible that our lives could find the same trajectory, sure. But she has never been ready for that kind of responsibility. At one point I may have been ready for that but I am no longer. I don't think her and I are headed towards friendship. What we realized last weekend is that regardless of the name we give our relationship we have feelings for each other that are inappropriate between friends. She has always prided herself on being able to keep a level head and somehow once I come around she becomes less level headed. I am not sure that we are giving things another try either. I guess the only thing we do know is that there is someone, somewhere who is thinking about us and missing us a whole lot.
nowhereman82 Posted September 7, 2008 Posted September 7, 2008 I don't get why people are so stubborn =/ I want to hear the "they lived happily ever after" story!
Author sao2 Posted September 7, 2008 Author Posted September 7, 2008 and I want to give you a happily ever after story. It may just take a a bit.
mousse Posted September 7, 2008 Posted September 7, 2008 [sIZE=2]Sao 2, My ex and I broke up mainly because of circumstances ( super long distance relations hip too, we were in two different countries at end of the relationship) and maturity levels and not because we weren‘t a good match. I haven’t seen him since the break up but something tells me that it would feel like it felt this last week end with you and your ex : we would get along very well and there would still be strong attraction. What I learned with my break up is that you can be with someone who’s a very good match for you but if one or both of the persons involved is not completely ready to be in a relationship, it’s not going to work, no matter how much love and compatibility there is in the couple. As you said, there still are strong feelings between you and her but if neither of you is truly ready to make it work, I guess there’s, sadly, nothing you can do, except, I guess, accept those feelings and live with them. [/sIZE]
amor Posted September 7, 2008 Posted September 7, 2008 [sIZE=2]Sao 2,[/sIZE] [sIZE=2] [/sIZE] [sIZE=2]My ex and I broke up mainly because of circumstances ( super long distance relations hip too, we were in two different countries at end of the relationship) and maturity levels and not because we weren‘t a good match. I haven’t seen him since the break up but something tells me that it would feel like it felt this last week end with you and your ex : we would get along very well and there would still be strong attraction. [/sIZE] [sIZE=2] [/sIZE] [sIZE=2]What I learned with my break up is that you can be with someone who’s a very good match for you but if one or both of the persons involved is not completely ready to be in a relationship, it’s not going to work, no matter how much love and compatibility there is in the couple. As you said, there still are strong feelings between you and her but if neither of you is truly ready to make it work, I guess there’s, sadly, nothing you can do, except, I guess, accept those feelings and live with them. [/sIZE] [sIZE=2][/sIZE] Hi everyone. I agree that a big problem in relationships is that someone in the relationship is "just not there yet". I think that this was an underlying factor in my breakup. I have a thread going, the link is below. I miss him and know that we are great together. What do you guys think? Any advice would be greatly appreciated!!!! http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t163451/
Recommended Posts