laars Posted September 1, 2008 Posted September 1, 2008 We broke up 2 weeks ago and I had a massively rough week and then started to feel a little better, started to go out with friends. Caught up with the ex on thursday and he kissed me straight away. Next day send me an email saying he want us to agree not to see other people while we're working things out. i don't agree but tell him i'll think about it. drop some of his stuff off on saturday and end up spending the whole weekend together and have an awesome time. he's saying things like "we're gonna make this work" and "I love you so much, i can't live without you". We don't really talk about what our expectations are after the weekend (bad Plan... BAD PLAN) and then talk to him last night about what he's doing this week and he just makes up stuff so he's busy every night and can't see me (things like grocery shopping) and then i get upset and try to break it off again because i was doing quite well without him and now i just feel like crap again. He wants time and space to work thigns out and I just feel like i'm getting jerked around by his indecision. i know we need to take things slow but the weekend wasn't taking things slow and he doesn't understand that you can't just expect to have times like that when we're together and then be on breakup condition (except not seeing other people) when we're apart. Now I'm just not coping and i'm so angry with myself for putting myself back in this position.
carhill Posted September 1, 2008 Posted September 1, 2008 Reading your backstory, how healthy is that love, really? I sense more fear than anything else. FWIW, you are in charge of you, whether together or "broken up". He doesn't "set" conditions for your behavior, you do. Go with that
BCCA Posted September 2, 2008 Posted September 2, 2008 I can't believe how many people out there pull this crap. I thought maybe I was special, guess not. Unfortunately, you are his back up plan. He knows he can say he loves you, spend the weekend with you, and then walk away from it with no attachments. Dont give him the satisfaction of your company any longer. If he needs time and space, give it to him in the form of not contacting him at all. I promise you that when/if he 'makes up his mind' and wants to work things out, he'll come find you. And if he doesn't, well what does that tell you? Dont be the backup/if all else fails plan. You're better than that.
wizzlebee Posted September 2, 2008 Posted September 2, 2008 I completely understand where you coming from , i cant believe how similar our past weekend was. My bf also wanted time and space to work out his head but begged to see me the weekend i ended up spending the weekend there and we never spoke about our situation I've been listening to Christine Aguilera's song Walk Away ....Its so true, and it helps me
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