jgaz3124 Posted August 31, 2008 Posted August 31, 2008 I am big on self help books about relationships, as they usually help me see where I am going wrong. I am just curious in knowing what are some of the titles to the self help books that you guys enjoy are?
CaliGuy Posted August 31, 2008 Posted August 31, 2008 Love Must Be Tough - Dobson No More Mr. Nice Guy - Glover
2sunny Posted August 31, 2008 Posted August 31, 2008 the four agreements by Ruiz. simple little powerful read. applies to life in general and relationships of all kind. it's awesome.
Ariadne Posted September 1, 2008 Posted September 1, 2008 Soulmates, by Carolyn Godschild Miller is pretty good. It talks about the difference between infatuation and true love and how to recognize true love.
Author jgaz3124 Posted September 1, 2008 Author Posted September 1, 2008 The book I am reading at the moment is " Why Men Marry Bitches" I actually find this book rather empowering for women and it really is kind of helping me slowly move on and not call my ex.
Biker2007 Posted September 1, 2008 Posted September 1, 2008 The first two are very good relationship books and the third one has some interesting techniques for communication in general: The Five Languages of Love No More Mister Nice Guy Non Violent Communication
Mending1985 Posted September 1, 2008 Posted September 1, 2008 The book I am reading at the moment is " Why Men Marry Bitches" I actually find this book rather empowering for women and it really is kind of helping me slowly move on and not call my ex. I read that book too! Very encouraging for independence.
ahhhchooo Posted September 1, 2008 Posted September 1, 2008 The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People... a good one
gd26 Posted September 1, 2008 Posted September 1, 2008 The book I am reading at the moment is " Why Men Marry Bitches" I actually find this book rather empowering for women and it really is kind of helping me slowly move on and not call my ex. Hah, I just read this book a few days ago and to my dismay.... I made soooo many of the mistakes in this book. I have been clingy, asking where things are going, telling him I thought he was my soulmate and that god brought us together, complimenting him for every little thing (I told him that he was the type of guy who could have any girl he wanted, etc etc), joking about how adorable our biracial babies would be. It's no wonder I scared him away. Geesh... if I had read this book only a few months ago, I would totally not be in the situation I am right now. It sucks because I am typically a fairly confident person... it's just that I haven't been in a relationship for 3 years and got rusty with dating principles, and let myself get too excited over him too early. If he had hung in longer, I think he would really have liked the real me. He just got to see my insecurities a bit too soon. Also if I had found LS a few months ago, I could have also saved things....as the advice here is great. It would have been so great to tell you all my thoughts, rather than telling him every sentimental thought about him that crossed my head. Seriously ladies, read this book.
gd26 Posted September 3, 2008 Posted September 3, 2008 Other books that are great are "Stop being the String Along" by Barbara Rose, and "How to Heal a Broken Heart in 30 Days" by Bronson and Riley. Barbara Rose's book is geared more towards women (although men could still benefit), and is for those who feel they are in a relationship with someone in which things don't feel mutual and they are being 'strung along'. And obviously Bronson and Riley's book is for people who know that things are over and are ready to start some healing. Another book mentioned earlier "Don't call that man!" is helpful for women who are struggling with a compulsive need to call their exes... that book is good too. I've also heard books by Byron Katie are great for helping a person introspect into their neediness in relationships. You can find all these books online, like on Amazon etc.
Mending1985 Posted September 3, 2008 Posted September 3, 2008 I got a lot out of "Playing Hard to Get" by Dr Cindy Pan & Bianca Dye - if only I'd read it BEFORE I met my ex things would've been a lot different! And "Obsessive Love - When It Hurts Too Much To Let Go" by Dr Susan Forward - I read it and WOW - it showed me exactly what I was doing, and where I could be headed if I wasn't careful. It was the first book that made me WANT to go NC.
sedgwick Posted September 3, 2008 Posted September 3, 2008 I second "Obsessive Love." That's a good one. "Don't Call That Man" has helped me when I really want to contact him and profess my undying love. It's so sad that women feel compelled to read "Why Men Marry Bitches" and then berate themselves for not having been bitchier. The day I find the guy who DOESN'T want a bitch, who just wants a woman to love him for who he is and wants to love her for who she is -- well, that'll be the day the sky falls, I suppose. I sort of feel like I have no business ever dating again if for no reason other than my inability to be a bitch. I guess I'm too nice for anyone to ever really want me.
seminoles84 Posted September 3, 2008 Posted September 3, 2008 I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell - Tucker Max (Funniest book I have EVER read). Actually I read this book.. built up confidence.. and found my girlfriend within a month lol
gd26 Posted September 3, 2008 Posted September 3, 2008 I second "Obsessive Love." That's a good one. "Don't Call That Man" has helped me when I really want to contact him and profess my undying love. It's so sad that women feel compelled to read "Why Men Marry Bitches" and then berate themselves for not having been bitchier. The day I find the guy who DOESN'T want a bitch, who just wants a woman to love him for who he is and wants to love her for who she is -- well, that'll be the day the sky falls, I suppose. I sort of feel like I have no business ever dating again if for no reason other than my inability to be a bitch. I guess I'm too nice for anyone to ever really want me. Hi Sedgwick, I read the 'Why Men Marry Bitches' book... and it's REALLY good. The author doesn't use the word bitch in the way many people imagine the word. It has nothing to do with not being yourself.... unless being clingy and settling for scraps is who a person is. It's really just about being a self-confident take-no-crap type of woman instead of being a doormat. Women who are confident and respect themselves are definitely a turn-on to men. It has nothing at all to do with being nasty... rather it's about being self-assured with a bit of a feisty edge. It's a funny book and I think most guys would enjoy reading it as well for amusement. I've heard Susan Forward's books are really good. In fact, I think I did read one of hers about 8-9 years ago (can't remember which) and it helped me a lot during that time. I'll certainly read another one of hers in the near future.
gd26 Posted September 3, 2008 Posted September 3, 2008 "Imagine a world in which roles were reversed and men cooked for women, picked up socks, and couldn't wait to get married. Pretend you had a boyfriend who owned a hope chest with six lavender bow ties inside that he wanted his groomsmen to wear at the wedding. Picture him getting choked up every time you strolled past a Baby Gap. And that he greeted you at the door wearing silk boxers and cowboy boots, so he could do a pole dance for you. Then add a few ultimatums: 'Where's my ring?' 'Why won't you marry me?' Chances are, you would assume the guy wasn't firing on all cylinders. And then you'd start planning your escape. 'It's not you, it's me. [Translation: It's definitely you.] I'm too busy with work. I love you but I'm not in love with you.' Then you'd blow out the door.... like TNT. As scary as it sounds, this is precisely the approach women are taught on how to catch a husband. It's the plight of every 'nice girl' who puts everyone else first, puts her own needs last, and doesn't think she is worthy of touching the hemline of her man's pants. When I polled men, they all said confident women are in very short supply. And that a confident woman is what they find sexiest. Is it any wonder that confident women are hard to come by? Look around. The average fashion magazine tells women to act like a servant, as if dating were a labor-intensive, blue-collar-job application: 'Can you serve a cold beer in trashy lingerie? Do you leave razor-sharp creases in his shirts like employee-of-the-month at the Jolly Roger motel? Do you wear cellophane for him? Are you gardening in stilettos? Are you giving it up doggie-style? If so, he'll drop to one knee and propose....' What women are learning from all of this is how to behave desperately. When her attitude is 'Pick me! Pick me!' she hits the kill switch on his desire. It's human nature. You'd be just as turned off by a guy who brought two dozen roses to a first coffee date and told you he felt like the luckiest SOB on the planet in the first five minutes. .... Just because a man sleeps with you doesn't mean he's thinking about the future. For him to think about forever, there has to be something he respects within you. Like a strong wit... and a strong mind. In romance, there's nothing more attractive to a man than a woman who has dignity and pride in who she is."
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