Jersey Shortie Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 This is Part one. I am going to post another thread of Part II asking the men the same question. We have alot of threads on here about men and women wondering what the other has to offer and being angry about expectations. So I am curious what each gender things they offer, as a gender and as an individual. I will go first. I think I offer an incredible amount of warmth and sensitivity for the right guy. I have a deeply passionate heart that I am wanting to share with someone. I am fiercly loyal to a fault. I am fun to be around and willing to have new experiences. I take pride and happiness in making my guy happy. I don't want to take away from him. I desire to give him respect, love, compassion, understanding, trust and a place where both of us can feel easier to be vulnerable with each other. I am a little fire cracker and can dish it out pretty good. I can pretty playful. I don't always communicate very well and am a little too highly emotional but my being emotional also makes me senstive to his needs. I am bright and positive most of the time. I think I have a unique perspective on life as well. I am not the hottest girl out there and I do get insecure about it but I am pretty cute and offer my own good qualities in that department. ... I think that's a good start at least. 1
Trialbyfire Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 TC I offer a sports car and an aging product that's worth a dime but will cost $10,000.
Trialbyfire Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Okay, being serious now. I offer: Love, laughter, passion, financial security, an array of interests, loyalty and someone trustworthy. Surprisingly, I can even offer compassion and common sense. I'm far from perfect but continue striving to improve.
Pyro Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Okay, being serious now. I offer: Love, laughter, passion, financial security, an array of interests, loyalty and someone trustworthy. Surprisingly, I can even offer compassion and common sense. I'm far from perfect but continue striving to improve. Come on now, lets be serious. J/K, TrialbyFlamer is an amazing woman. Any guy would be lucky to have her company.
Trialbyfire Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Come on now, lets be serious. J/K, TrialbyFlamer is an amazing woman. Any guy would be lucky to have her company. Brat! Thanks...firebug!
Pyro Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Thats a good one. You have my permission to use that name. OK, back on topic.
Tomcat33 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 TC I offer a sports car and an aging product that's worth a dime but will cost $10,000. It's more than what I have to offer, consider yourself a true catch!
KinAZ Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 In a way, it's sort of like what I read elsewhere about personal ads... everyone is going to list the same qualities, just as everyone is going to list the same interests. LOL, we all think we're loving and at least say we're faithful, and even when we know that we could be better, our first thought is "no one is perfect." I'm loyal, compassionate, understanding, and nurturing. I don't take myself too seriously, but I take life seriously enough to avoid being too wasteful or careless. I take plans, goals, and my future seriously. And while I like to keep order and plan ahead in many areas of my life, I'm not allergic to spontaneity. I THINK that the one thing that sets me apart from the crowd (though it doesn't make me a "unique flower") is that I try to keep my ego on the side, and I try to remain self-aware. I try to find the good in even the worst of situations, and I try even harder to learn from "mistakes" (mine as well as those of others). I try harder than anyone I know to empathize... I'm just as eager to learn as I am to teach. I think I am open-minded with regard to most things, and while I may be opinionated, I wouldn't consider myself to be judgmental. What do women as a whole have to offer? Depends on the woman, but the possibilities are endless as long as she is willing to allow herself to give as well as learn. If I were to answer that in terms of why a man "needs" a woman, I would have to say for balance. Generally, even the the least dainty of women have a softness that the average man does not. Men and women often view and address matters differently, and having that second opinion and balance in your life from the one who is capable could be an advantage. Every man needs something slightly different, and every women is capable of giving something different. But support, dependability, and comfort are probably among the most important things that a woman can give a man.
Vertex Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 The OP sounds pretty interesting to me, lol. And to answer KinAZ's post, I'm sure most personal ads are going to be similar, but a lot of it is reading between the lines.
KinAZ Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 The OP sounds pretty interesting to me, lol. And to answer KinAZ's post, I'm sure most personal ads are going to be similar, but a lot of it is reading between the lines. I don't know, as I haven't really ever read any. But on another message board someone commented about how they all say the same things. And well, I thought it was an interested observation, considering the well known "long walks on the beach" etc. lol But yes, I do agree that it is an interesting thread. I actually considered posting something similar, but not in this way, as I do think it is important that people consider what they have to offer to the other sex and what they could actually do better, not simply what the others aren't doing right and what they can't seem to get in return.
Author Jersey Shortie Posted August 30, 2008 Author Posted August 30, 2008 Nothing I am over 30. :lmao: The OP sounds pretty interesting to me, lol. Thanks! I managed to charm a 5 year old boy into saying hello yesterday to me and offering me his name as I sat in a coffee shop reading and drinking my latte...now if I could get a grown man to do that.......
refurb Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Okay, being serious now. I offer: Love, laughter, passion, financial security, an array of interests, loyalty and someone trustworthy. Surprisingly, I can even offer compassion and common sense. I'm far from perfect but continue striving to improve. What a co-inky-dink! I just happen to lookin' for a sugar-momma! RF
Author Jersey Shortie Posted August 30, 2008 Author Posted August 30, 2008 You'd be the younger man in the situation, that's for sure!
LucreziaBorgia Posted August 31, 2008 Posted August 31, 2008 - a shoulder to lean on - a warm fit body to cuddle up with - hot sex with some kink here and there - a love for cooking/baking - nurturing - protective and attentive mothering for our child - a willingness to compromise and know when to choose my battles - enough of a male side to be like 'one of the guys' when necessary - a lucid understanding and appreciation of men and how they think/operate - sharp wit and intellect balanced with often low brow humor - a withholding of some of myself to prevent the 'familiarity breeds contempt' problem - always willing to listen - open mindedness - loyalty
Trialbyfire Posted August 31, 2008 Posted August 31, 2008 It's more than what I have to offer, consider yourself a true catch! Check out my sig. Am I a true catch or what, huh? What a co-inky-dink! I just happen to lookin' for a sugar-momma! RF Good luck with that! Take care.
vanilla87 Posted August 31, 2008 Posted August 31, 2008 Lets see... I offer compassion, trust, honesty, humor, sensuality, intelligence, stability, independence, dedication, understanding, and respect. I'm a tomboy with a girly side that loves football, thinks fast cars are meant for to be raced, gets the point of "guy time" with his buds, not irked by porn or strip clubs, isn't possessive about his past, actually willing to cook for non-romantic situations, understands why they love a good kisser, quotes movies and music like a guy, and always gives advice only when asked never when i feel like it. I'm only 21, but I understand guys very well, my first best friend was a guy, and well I'm laid back about more things then most girls/women are when it comes to men, I mean some are probably wondering why I don't give a damn about porn/strippers. See the thing is this: Its just there, probably not going anywhere, so why bother? Well if it does bother you, then your not secure enough to trust that guy. See its just visual stimulation, which in turn, if he comes home turned on from seeing naked women at a strip club or is turned on by seeing another woman having sex in a porno vid, then knowing that he comes to you to have the sex, thats important, its bad when he decides he can release the tension with that stripper, some other girl, or by himself, thats when you need to worry, cause then maybe he doesn't need you anymore for sexual fun, which is a red flag in any relationship/marriage.
Taramere Posted August 31, 2008 Posted August 31, 2008 I'm slim, funny, polite (in real life) and well travelled. When you're done with me, I'll pack my red and white spotted handkerchief, tie it onto the end of my stick and trot away without a backwards glance.
paddington bear Posted August 31, 2008 Posted August 31, 2008 I think the question is not what women offer men, but what men want from women and vice versa. I offer the usual blah blah, honesty, fun, openness, understanding and on and on. It's all very well offering these things, but if no one actually wants them, you're screwed (not literally unfortunately!!) A friend of mine once said that ultimately men want sex and women want someone to snuggle to watching dvd's - ok so she was being humorous, but I think there's a grain of truth in it. I think if you offer yourself as the whole, lovely, soft, caring womanly package a lot of men aren't interested because it's not sexy enough or you come across as mothering them too much, which again is just not sexy. In my experience if men even get a whiff of the fact that you might want more than just casual sex they think 'Holy cow, she wants a relationship! Run for the hills. Flee! Arghhhhhhh!' and this is not just a certain type of guy, it seems to span from the bad boys, to the not so good-looking seemingly shy guys and everything in between. So it has now come down to this, pretend that I'm easy-breezy about the whole wanting a relationship thing while appearing like a super-hot babe type woman in order to ensnare some poor unsuspecting guy into a relationship. Don't want to do that, but hey, no one has the least bit of interest in all the 'qualities' I have on offer, just a quick shag and then bye bye so what's a girl to do other than be some horrific, devious, Machiavellian schemer. Bitter? Moi?
marlena Posted August 31, 2008 Posted August 31, 2008 Nothing I am over 30. Everything. I am over forty.
Taramere Posted August 31, 2008 Posted August 31, 2008 In my experience if men even get a whiff of the fact that you might want more than just casual sex they think 'Holy cow, she wants a relationship! Run for the hills. Flee! Arghhhhhhh!' and this is not just a certain type of guy, it seems to span from the bad boys, to the not so good-looking seemingly shy guys and everything in between. So it has now come down to this, pretend that I'm easy-breezy about the whole wanting a relationship thing while appearing like a super-hot babe type woman in order to ensnare some poor unsuspecting guy into a relationship. Don't want to do that, but hey, no one has the least bit of interest in all the 'qualities' I have on offer, just a quick shag and then bye bye so what's a girl to do other than be some horrific, devious, Machiavellian schemer. What you regard as horrific, devious, Machiavellian scheming, I would regard as adherence to a philosophy whereby you focus on pursuing happiness and make the decision that your ability to be happy will not be dependent on others. You accept life as it is and tailor your behaviour accordingly in order to maximise your own happiness. The moment you realise you want something more, and he indicates that he will only ever want sex, you don't start playing all kinds of Machiavellian games. You distance yourself from him, and focus your mind on other things that will make you happy. Accepting that he won't. There are hundreds of different ways of having fun and bringing a bit of joi de vivre into your life. Engaging in romantic relationships with the opposite sex being just one form. If you rely to much on that particular source of happiness, it's bound to lead to bitterness sooner or later.
paddington bear Posted August 31, 2008 Posted August 31, 2008 What you regard as horrific, devious, Machiavellian scheming, I would regard as adherence to a philosophy whereby you focus on pursuing happiness and make the decision that your ability to be happy will not be dependent on others. You accept life as it is and tailor your behaviour accordingly in order to maximise your own happiness. The moment you realise you want something more, and he indicates that he will only ever want sex, you don't start playing all kinds of Machiavellian games. You distance yourself from him, and focus your mind on other things that will make you happy. Accepting that he won't. There are hundreds of different ways of having fun and bringing a bit of joi de vivre into your life. Engaging in romantic relationships with the opposite sex being just one form. If you rely to much on that particular source of happiness, it's bound to lead to bitterness sooner or later. Actually that is pretty much my philosophy I have pretty full life and am self-sufficient. Would I like having someone to love in my life? Sure, it would be a nice addition, but not essential to my happiness. I meant Machiavellian in terms of first meeting someone. The original thread question asked about qualities women offer and I guess right now I think that being kind, caring, liking pina coladas and walks in teh rain (!) etc etc just isn't relevant to men. If you put me, a guy and a really hot girl in a room together, who will he go for, the girl who he can talk to and laugh with, who has all the qualities that he says he is looking for in a woman, or the woman that radiates sex appeal? I'm not saying that I'm not sexy or attractive, just that initially personality can be totally overlooked in favour of 'how soon will she sleep with me?' I know so many fantastic single female friends and just can't understand why they haven't been snapped up. They have so much to offer and no one is in the least bit interested in their 'qualities' which is a real shame.
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