It's hard not calling/texting my gf all the time...

[GoGators2008]

Recently my gf moved away and she's really busy with things. I find myself calling/texting her a lot and she's beginning to be really annoyed by this.

 

I feel like I'm too clingy I guess but I just wanna talk to her all the time like when we were together before. She sometimes doesn't return my call until the next day and seems distant on text msgs. I wanna stop calling/texting her so much but I can't seem to help myself, when I see that phone I have to talk to her even if she doesn't respond.

 

I guess my question is should I be worried, or am I being paranoid? AND

What should I do to keep myself from becoming needy? (I call/text her mostly at work)

 

Thanks.

[MzHopeful]

Im probally the worst person to be getting love advice from but it sounds like you care about your GF a whole lot. Coming from my point of view as a woman, i dont see anything wrong with it. However while she is at work might cause problems with her employer.

 

When my husband and i first started to date we texted all the time. It was a great way to keep in touch while he was on shift. Sometimes it took him a while to get a reply back to me and i would panic because id been in relationships where i had been cheated on before. But eventually the text would come and he would have been just working on a case. Wait for her to call you next time and tell her you want to get together. Work in a better time to call and see if sticking to texting is ok while she is at work, but be honest with her and tell her your feelings. There is never room for lies in a relationship & It is best to keep all your cards on the table. If it is bothering you that she isnt returning calls casually bring it up, dont toss it in her face though. She might just be busy and when she gets home it might just be to late or she is to tired to call. At least give her benefit of the doubt. Things will turn around. Coming from a person who knows all to much about texting, maybe just try to slim it down a little til you can talk to her about it. Be supportive of her job and let her know that you just miss how close things were before and that her move/job is a change for both of you. Tell her you except the change in her job and work life but it should not effect you personal relationship. Maybe not in those exact words but im sure you can get your point/feelings across. For extra points... bring flowers. Good Luck! Hope this helps alittle.

[LoveLace]

Give her a day or two of space, then limit yourself to one text a day or something like that. She's more likely to respond to then. She might be annoyed if it's too many times while she's at work. I dont know though, hard to know what she's thinking right now.

 

Another option is to just talk to her about it and tell her how you are feeling, that would give her an opportunity to say anything she might be keeping inside. Long distance relationships are hard. But all relationships take work and patience. Try and keep that in mind.

[Ronni_W]

What should I do to keep myself from becoming needy?

Work on your personal growth and development: find out who you are, what you like, what you're passionate about, what you dislike, what are your values, where do you want to be in 3 years...5...10? How can you get there? How are you GONNA get there...what do you need to do today and next week, to get there? Start doing it.

Who do you want to be? What type of qualities and skills do you want to possess? -- start building the qualities and acquiring the knowledge and skills. What do you want them to say about your life, in your eulogy? -- start creating your life so they'll actually get to say it!

Volunteer at a place that supports your passion or helps you acquire a desired skill. Pursue your hobbies and interests whether it's drama or hockey or bird watching...or ALL of that.

 

Get cracking...no time to lose. You are gonna be so engrossed in creating and living your own life, she'll soon be BEGGING for a text or two

 

EDIT: This is about you making plans for you. NOT plans that include any other people. They get to make their own plans. NOT what you want "if only" that other thing happens or person wants it, too. Just you and your life and your dreams and visions.