Charisma Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 Hey gang, So I recently went on this date with a guy who was married for two years a couple of years ago and I think I messed up. We had dinner together and things went well because later we went to the bar for drinks for several hours. The date took a nose dive after that because he told me about his previous marriage and having never been married before I was shocked. I asked a lot of questions and he spoke openly about it and he knew that I had a problem accepting it. It really didn’t sit well with me at first since I’m so old fashioned with the idea of marriage. Something tells me that there won’t be a second date because of how I felt. I sent him an e-mail and tried to patch it up just explaining that I had trouble understanding it since I hadn’t gone through it before. He hasn’t returned my call nor e-mail. I was just wondering if anyone had any advice on my next move. Should I just leave all else alone and move on. The idea of his previous marriage is starting to sink in and with time I think that I would accept it. He even told me that we’d do something again together and that he was interested.
Tomcat33 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Sorry but you were shocked about what? And you are old fashioned in what respect??? Lastly he knew you had a problem accepting what?
carhill Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 I was just wondering if anyone had any advice on my next move Your next move is to dish the dirt here. We can't help unless we know the details
Tomcat33 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Your next move is to dish the dirt here. We can't help unless we know the details :laugh: That was good!
carhill Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Hey, it's Friday and my wife is working late. You know about when the *ahem* is away the mice will play
Ronni_W Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 You know about when the *ahem* is away the mice will play er...cheese? Or else, with whom, exactly, are you playing "hickory DICKory dock"??? Charisma, your "shock" probably came off as being judgmental, or maybe prudish, or as an indication that the two of you won't be able to relate on the same level about specific things. (Not that your reaction was "wrong" in any way, just these are some ways he may have interpreted it.) But yes, all you can do is leave it alone. However he interpreted it, he wasn't pleased (or he would have responded to you by now.) But, most anyone over 21 will have a similar sad and/or ugly story to tell...it may be something with which you'll want to come to terms.
Tomcat33 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Hey, it's Friday and my wife is working late. You know about when the *ahem* is away the mice will play I thought I heard scurrying on this end of the forum....
carhill Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 er...cheese? Or else, with whom, exactly, are you playing "hickory DICKory dock"??? Slang term for cat... Guess the OP disappeared. In light of the dearth of further details, I would opine, in general, the past is the past and one should be judged by who they are today. Past performance can be an indicator of future behavior, but one should merely be aware rather than prejudiced, IMO. "Cat" got seared ahi, broccoli au gratin', and seared vegetables. Happily purring now
Tomcat33 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 "Cat" got seared ahi, broccoli au gratin', and seared vegetables. Happily purring now Mmmmmmmmmmmmm there aren't enough "mmmmmmms" to express my content. I love seared ahi, my favourite food in the world!! That sounds whole dinner spectacular. Wait you are the mouse, you can't purr!
Ronni_W Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Slang term for cat... Guess I was showing my ancient-ness again . You know? - that nursery rhyme that goes "hickory, dickory, dock; the mouse ran up the clock"? No? Ah, screw'itt then. You young'uns don't know nuttin', honey . Anyway, yeah, when OP gets back you guys all gonna get infractions for going OT. And I gave sound, albeit ancient, input. So there. So anyway. OP, that's fine if you want to add more details to satisfy the young'uns -- they seem to need that so they can input their own solutions to your dilemma.
Jilly Bean Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 First off, if he's getting into that kind of detail about his marriage on date one, he is SO not over it and still healing from it. And if you are that tweaked by hearing these stories, then you are just grossly mismatched and shouldn't be trying to patch anything up.
carhill Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 You know? - that nursery rhyme that goes "hickory, dickory, dock; the mouse ran up the clock"? No? Yup, know that nursery rhyme well. Mom recited it often when I was a "yung-un". So, is the OP insinuating that the man she met had infidelity in his past, or perhaps swinging? Fishing for some more tuna here
Ronni_W Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 So, is the OP insinuating that the man she met had infidelity in his past, or perhaps swinging? Possibly. I'm also thinking it could have been a bit like not being able to drag one's self away from the scene of a really horrific accident...cos she kept asking more questions although she was also, apparently, becoming more horrified or disgusted or whatever. Like you say, though, we are but left to speculate. (And I'm sitting here speculating as to why you're not busy typing up that journal entry you promised me??? Highly intellectual minds must have the details, as you well are aware.)
Tomcat33 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 that nursery rhyme that goes "hickory, dickory, dock; the mouse ran up the clock"? No? For a second there I thought you were going to post the Andrew Dice Clay version...phewwww.
Ronni_W Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 For a second there I thought you were going to post the Andrew Dice Clay version...phewwww. Drats! See...I told you I am too old <whine...wheeze>. Now I guess I gotta try this new-fangled youtube-thingy and find out what THAT's about <wheeze...whine>. Does it have anything to do with tom cats???
Tomcat33 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Drats! See...I told you I am too old <whine...wheeze>. Now I guess I gotta try this new-fangled youtube-thingy and find out what THAT's about <wheeze...whine>. Does it have anything to do with tom cats??? No way Ronni you're not old you prob just don't know or don't remember him !!! Andrew Dice Clay was from the 80s so it's not new at all. but look him up Andrew Dice Clay nursery rhymes, be warned it's rude.
Ronni_W Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Well, thank heavens I am old enough to handle "rude", at least. But you're right, I am an 80s chick...or was I a disco babe?...and I do know his name (are you psychic, or wot?) Not sure if it was just that his humour didn't appeal to me. Maybe I like "smart rude"...or maybe "rude and lascivious". Who knows? The cheese is purring and the cat is running up the clock so...who knows?
carhill Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Will a pseudo-date with a not so divorced man journal do?
Tomcat33 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Well, thank heavens I am old enough to handle "rude", at least. But you're right, I am an 80s chick...or was I a disco babe?...and I do know his name (are you psychic, or wot?) Not sure if it was just that his humour didn't appeal to me. Maybe I like "smart rude"...or maybe "rude and lascivious". Who knows? The cheese is purring and the cat is running up the clock so...who knows? :lmao: TRUST me his sense of humour is SO NOT what I prefer but every time I hear a nursery rhyme his cheesola voice is ingrained in my head going "Mary mary quite contrary.....ohhhh"
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