Author Star Gazer Posted August 30, 2008 Author Posted August 30, 2008 Yes, there is a huge problem with that. Myspace for a life partner? Why do you become so defensive? 3 awesome guys? The reality is you do not have even one. You are completely single and dating. 97% of people do not meet there spouse online. All it takes is to meet one real guy, in real life, and you are set. Seeking sparks from myspace buddies who you used to be friends with is an exercise in futility. Go get out of the house and meet someone new. Why are you so afraid of that? Instead you post over and over about how you are dating several internet guys that you knew from the past, or are friends of friends. For the last time: these are not "internet guys." I did NOT meet these guys online, NOT that it matters. I met them in human flesh for the first time, before ever coincidentally having them wonder, "I wonder what Star Gazer is up to?" and LOOKING for me and finding me on MS. I now spend my time with them AGAIN - as we once did long before I ever even used the internet! - in person. I also have GIRLFRIENDS or other platonic friends who I met IRL in college, lawschool, or other means, who I reunited with via MySpace as well, and now we hang out in person all the time. Are those relationships any less meaningful than if I had found them again at a bar or church or standing in line at a movie? Puleeeze. I'm not going to let you devalue my relationships - platonic or otherwise - simply based on the way we met and/or reconnected.
Green Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 What do you think causes sparks or butterflies? Answer that. It happens when you meet someone NEW, and usually in a rare, or unique way. Internet dating is not very conducive to that, neither is dating people who you were friends with 8 years ago. its been a while since this woman has experienced romance, everything is like some business interview... she needs to rewire her brain
Author Star Gazer Posted August 30, 2008 Author Posted August 30, 2008 What do you think causes sparks or butterflies? Answer that. It happens when you meet someone NEW, and usually in a rare, or unique way. Internet dating is not very conducive to that, neither is dating people who you were friends with 8 years ago. Well, ACTUALLY... the text dumper WAS an internet guy and he's the last one who DID give me butterflies. So there goes your theory, dude! As for what causes butterflies? Have you read this thread? There you'll have your answer: it's a sign of uncertainty. And not a good sign at that.
Author Star Gazer Posted August 30, 2008 Author Posted August 30, 2008 Both KMT and von don't seem to have followed your dating history, Star. In the past she has dated complete strangers, met in real life. She's also met guys through online dating that, yes, she's met and dated in real life. She's also dated men that she's known for years. Precisely. its been a while since this woman has experienced romance, everything is like some business interview... she needs to rewire her brain How the he!! would you know? You know nothing about how my dates go down. Not a thing. Last night was very romantic...
2sunny Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Well, ACTUALLY... the text dumper WAS an internet guy and he's the last one who DID give me butterflies. So there goes your theory, dude! As for what causes butterflies? Have you read this thread? There you'll have your answer: it's a sign of uncertainty. And not a good sign at that. for me it's a vulnerable predicament to be in because it causes me to bend my usual rules to accomodate a grey area that i should never consider in the first place... = trouble. yikes. ya, no butterflies no butterflies!
Author Star Gazer Posted August 30, 2008 Author Posted August 30, 2008 for me it's a vulnerable predicament to be in because it causes me to bend my usual rules to accomodate a grey area that i should never consider in the first place... = trouble. yikes. ya, no butterflies no butterflies! That's a good way to put it. I've done the very same thing. Bending myself, my standards, my values...all in the name of those stomach-churning butterflies. Bad news!
vonerik012 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Why do you post if you just want to argue with everyone? Sparks and butterflies typically happen with STRANGERS. Not old college buddies you looked up on Myspace. Or they looked you up, sorry. lol You just were let go by a guy last week, and within 1 WEEK you have 3 fabulous men! You need to be writing books on attracting men, not posting on myspace for advice. And the internet guy you had butterflies for did not approach you. He clicked a mouse., Same with the current dudes. Easy come easy go.
Green Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Maybe she just likes talking about all this on the msg board for no reason then... And I know a few things about you so don't kidd yourself. Anyways good luck something romantic could always happen and give you butterfliees or something its equivalent or better.
2sunny Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Why do you post if you just want to argue with everyone? Sparks and butterflies typically happen with STRANGERS. Not old college buddies you looked up on Myspace. Or they looked you up, sorry. lol You just were let go by a guy last week, and within 1 WEEK you have 3 fabulous men! You need to be writing books on attracting men, not posting on myspace for advice. And the internet guy you had butterflies for did not approach you. He clicked a mouse., Same with the current dudes. Easy come easy go. von e - you are making judgments and assumptions here. i don't see her arguing with me! keep it real honey!
2sunny Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Maybe she just likes talking about all this on the msg board for no reason then... And I know a few things about you so don't kidd yourself. Anyways good luck something romantic could always happen and give you butterfliees or something its equivalent or better. huh??? :confused: not nice to kiss and tell!
norajane Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 I'm finding this to be absolutely true. With the text dumper, I never felt like I could be myself completely...didn't feel confortable really talking to him. It was a very odd dynamic. He's very engaging, but I couldn't reciprocate. I was too nervous around him or something. With the guy from last night, I felt completely comfortable. I guess sometimes I assume that level of comfort is a bad thing...like it's platonic or something. That guy is the keeper.
Author Star Gazer Posted August 30, 2008 Author Posted August 30, 2008 Why do you post if you just want to argue with everyone? Sparks and butterflies typically happen with STRANGERS. Not old college buddies you looked up on Myspace. Or they looked you up, sorry. lol Doesn't it stand to reason that people on the internet are...wait for it..."strangers"? LOL I've experienced butterflies with strangers, friends, coworkers, you name it. "Sorry." You just were let go by a guy last week, and within 1 WEEK you have 3 fabulous men! You need to be writing books on attracting men, not posting on myspace for advice. I was dating one of the three the entire time I was also dating the text dumper. The two others literally found me this week. Eeery coincidence, but all the real, I assure you. And the internet guy you had butterflies for did not approach you. He clicked a mouse., Same with the current dudes. Easy come easy go. Not sure what you mean by this. Actually, I'm not sure how ANYTHING you have to say is relevant to the OP.
Author Star Gazer Posted August 30, 2008 Author Posted August 30, 2008 Maybe she just likes talking about all this on the msg board for no reason then... And I know a few things about you so don't kidd yourself. Anyways good luck something romantic could always happen and give you butterfliees or something its equivalent or better. Oh really? Such as? I don't know you from Adam.
Author Star Gazer Posted August 30, 2008 Author Posted August 30, 2008 That guy is the keeper. I actually keep reading one of your posts from a few weeks ago, NJ...about me not being ready for a relationship because I'm so focused on the guys who are unreliable. I've been thinking about it ever since, and finding myself more and more attracted to the guys who are more actively interested, sincere, and who I feel really comfortable around. I feel REALLY comfortable around this one. In a really, really good way.
vonerik012 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Doesn't it stand to reason that people on the internet are...wait for it..."strangers"? LOL I've experienced butterflies with strangers, friends, coworkers, you name it. "Sorry." I was dating one of the three the entire time I was also dating the text dumper. The two others literally found me this week. Eeery coincidence, but all the real, I assure you. Not sure what you mean by this. Actually, I'm not sure how ANYTHING you have to say is relevant to the OP. I don't NEED nor WANT to meet any more people right now. It's hard enough juggling 3 awesome guys! Your problem is that your insecurity even comes across on an internet message board. We are all strangers, and do not know you. You seem to have too much pride, or are very insecure. A guy just let you go last week. Now you have 3 men. 2 just messaged you on Myspace THIS WEEK to say hi from college 8 years ago. . The third you were seeing and obviously had little interest in,(or vice versa) as you were in love with the other internet guy. So, how does that equal "juggling 3 awesome guys"? Can you not be real? That is probably what turns men off after a few dates. Or do you really feel you are juggling 3 awesome guys because 2 just messaged you this week to say hi on myspace?
Tomcat33 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Star sometimes we confuse drama with love or the feelings of falling in love. It all goes back to our upbringing, and what feels familiar to us. Feeling overly unstable and giddy for a guy is more drama, than feelings of love. Of course passion and the process of falling in love is comprised of a certain level of uncertainty, mystery, familiarity and fear of loss but when it is so tipped over to one extreme we may be forcing a situation that is not healthy for us. What do you think causes sparks or butterflies? Answer that. What do you think does? Would love to hear you answer that. It happens when you meet someone NEW, and usually in a rare, or unique way. Internet dating is not very conducive to that, neither is dating people who you were friends with 8 years ago. SO one dimensional. Honestly I have never read more boring comments out of someone, are you this boring and one dimensional in real life? I mean great if it works for you terrific...but broooooother!
vonerik012 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Tomcat sorry.. I am sure all Ls'ers have been completely thrilled with your exciting posts and comments. What was one dimensional about my last post that you highlighted? I would be more exciting if I dated off myspace? lol
Author Star Gazer Posted August 30, 2008 Author Posted August 30, 2008 A guy just let you go last week. Now you have 3 men. Yeah, and? 2 just messaged you on Myspace THIS WEEK to say hi from college 8 years ago. . The third you were seeing and obviously had little interest in,(or vice versa) as you were in love with the other internet guy. What are you smokin'? I was never in love with ANYONE! As for the rest, what's your point? Are you suggesting I'm making this stuff up? Like they say, when it rains, it pours. So, how does that equal "juggling 3 awesome guys"? Can you not be real? That is probably what turns men off after a few dates. Or do you really feel you are juggling 3 awesome guys because 2 just messaged you this week to say hi on myspace? I've been on three dates this week. I have a second date with the guy from last night set up for tomorrow, a third date with Wednesday guy set for Monday, and a first date with another one for Sunday. That's juggling to me. We're not talkin' about simple messaging dude.
Tomcat33 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 What was one dimensional about my last post that you highlighted? I would be more exciting if I dated off myspace? lol This: It happens when you meet someone NEW, and usually in a rare, or unique way. Internet dating is not very conducive to that, neither is dating people who you were friends with 8 years ago. With the exception of the internet dating thing, which I would tend to agree since I find it pointless and azz backwards since chemistry can only happen in person, the idea that you think it can only happen in a new and unique and rare place and not with friends from 8yrs ago just shows your level of shallowness because you are basing this connection on extrenal factors. The butterflies happens when someone moves you from the inside out you could be talking to someone on the bus and feel that, or you could be talking to your office mate after work one day and all of a sudden see them in a totally different light. OR it could happen with someone you lost touch with years ago and reconnect with and in a moment of talking and sharing you suddenly feel a tinge of something inside and you notice this person like you have not noticed them before and BAM! So if you are saying all these other external factors need to take place in order for this type of connection to happen you are one dimensional, you don't connect with people you connect with how the overall situation makes you feel in a determined circumstance. Im susprised you don't do the Myspace thing, it's all about creating circumstances there.
vonerik012 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Tomcat thats your opinion, I have my own. I don't think you develop "buttterflies" with a coworker you never were attracted to before.(Or any other related circumstance) If you believe that, thats fine. I didn't say all these factors must happen, that is how I feel it usually happens. My main point is it does not occur by meeting old friends or anyone else through myspace. It is not natural. Perhaps I did word it incorrectly. I meant any place out and about. Which would be new compared to sitting behind a computer. Rare as in unexpected.
Tomcat33 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 I don't think you develop "buttterflies" with a coworker you never were attracted to before. That's very different than what you stated before, and this I would agree with personally, but for some people it does happen. I am not one of them.
pandagirl Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 I feel like the question of this thread can be easily answered: if you like him, you should feel like you want to see him again!
Lauriebell82 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 It's interesting to view reactions to posters who are agreeing and disagreeing with the OP. You seem to react negatively to those who you feel are not agreeing with you. It's just an observation, but I'm noticing a pattern in this thread along with others. People are going to agree and disagree, like I have said before, actually what YOU have said SG. Nobody on this forum is aware of anyone else's REAL LIFE experiences. Therefore nothing any poster can say to anyone else has any real credible attribution. It's just observations from postings. So SG, instead of argue its better to agree to disagree with the person. Getting defensive and upset over posts does not help you or anyone else for that matter.
Author Star Gazer Posted August 30, 2008 Author Posted August 30, 2008 It's interesting to view reactions to posters who are agreeing and disagreeing with the OP. You seem to react negatively to those who you feel are not agreeing with you. It's just an observation, but I'm noticing a pattern in this thread along with others. :lmao::lmao: You're so transparent, it's ridiculous. Stay out of my threads if you want to make things personal. There's nothing to disagree with or agree with here. The subject matter is what level of butterflies after a first date justifies a second, third, etc. date. To turn it into a debate over how and where to meet people is irrelevant. Besides, I don't have the so-called love of my life refusing to marry me. Instead, I've got 3 guys vying for my attention...so all's good in my world.
Lauriebell82 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 :lmao::lmao: You're so transparent (and passive-aggressive and bratty), it's ridiculous. Stay out of my threads if you want to make things personal. There's nothing to disagree with or agree with here. The subject matter is what level of butterflies after a first date justifies a second, third, etc. date. To turn it into a debate over how and where to meet people is irrelevant. Nothing passive-agressive about it. You are blunt with me, i'm being blunt with you. I don't even think I said anything mean at all. But, ya know, debates happen in threads. Pretty much every thread here has SOME kind of debate going on in it, because of difference in opinions. That's not a surprise.
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