mortensorchid Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 Where and how can one meet someone who isn't a loser? Any suggestions before I throw in the towel and say I"m going to be alone for the rest of my life"?
Art_Critic Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 Any suggestions before I throw in the towel and say I"m going to be alone for the rest of my life"? Yeah.. Throw the towel in As soon as you stop looking the great guy will be around the corner.. it always works that way
CaliGuy Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 Where and how can one meet someone who isn't a loser? Any suggestions before I throw in the towel and say I"m going to be alone for the rest of my life"? The more confident and secure you are in yourself, the more likely you will attract the right person. Not saying there is anything wrong with you. A lot of it is trial and error. I am learning to pay attention to red flags, no matter how damn hot she is It's saved me a lot of headaches lately. (No, I will not stare at your rack Ms. Hottie when you're giving off red flags!)
johan Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 It depends on where you look and who you hang out with. Also, I'm coming to the conclusion that "loser" has little relation to income or looks or profession or style or lifestyle. It takes getting to know someone. People tend to surprise me particularly when I compare who I find someone really is to who I thought they would be.
alphamale Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 Where and how can one meet someone who isn't a loser? the bar area of high-end exclusive restaurants is usually a good place to meet classy men with money although it tends to be an older crowd. these are the places where a vodka martini plus tip will run you $15. may i suggest you wear your nicest designer dress and expensive shoes. good luck
konfuzd Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 You need to switch your way of thinking. Instead of looking for a guy who "isn't a loser", try to find someone who is ambitious, full of life, etc... It may seem minor, but even the subconscious thought of, "I wonder if this one will be a loser like the rest" projects to the universe and actually attracts those kind of people. I've had 3 long term realationships in my life, and all three of them started when I wasn't looking for a relationship. Guy 1- I could have sworn he was gay. I definately wasn't looking for anything with him, so I was just really friendly. He took it as flirting and asked me out. Guy 2- I was at the bar, spending most of the night talking to a guy. I left the bar. Halfway home, I decided I should have given him my number, so I went back to the bar. On my search for this guy, another guy struck up a conversation, so I ended up handing him the number I had written down for the other guy. Guy 3 (current BF)- He showed up at a few concerts with a mutual friend, found out he lived out of town. He called me to hang out because his friend had other plans one night, and he didn't know anyone else in town. I was just there to help him out. He was leaving the next day, but we agreed to keep in touch. We've been dating over a year now.
Jersey Shortie Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 As soon as you stop looking the great guy will be around the corner.. it always works that way Except when you don't have a special someone in your life romantically and really want one, and see other couples, and see your friends, that takes up alot of your thoughts most of the time about prospects and if that guy you've been seeing likes you..and if that guy you always had a crush on the gym would just as you out...and if that guy is even right for you to begin with...
rod_in_gtown Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 the bar area of high-end exclusive restaurants is usually a good place to meet classy men with money although it tends to be an older crowd. these are the places where a vodka martini plus tip will run you $15. may i suggest you wear your nicest designer dress and expensive shoes. good luck Hahahahahahaha!!! God I love sarcasm!!
rod_in_gtown Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 ...and if that guy you always had a crush on the gym would just as you out... Ok I've never tried to ask anyone out at the gym... I'm always in, workout, out. It kind of seems cliche to me, are women ok in general with being approached at the gym? It seems kind of unnatural to me for some reason. Specially in the classes that I take it's almost like everyone is there but nobody really aknowledges anyone else. It's eerily devoid of emotion.
Lucky555 Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 Yeah i don't know and i THREW IN THE TOWEL! Believe me if you just throw it in you will have more fun! lol My friend recently found a great guy on online dating. I myself went onto to look but I didn't see anything i was drawn to. I am a person who has to meet them and then see. SO I resorted back to meeting people instead of going online browsing. I felt like i was shopping and it was fun...but i don't get much out of reading profiles. I still have hope though! I'm single myself but yeah i just stopped looking now!
lovestruck818 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Where and how can one meet someone who isn't a loser? Any suggestions before I throw in the towel and say I"m going to be alone for the rest of my life"? I feel the same way. I just ended my relationship and am starting to think that after dating loser after loser that all men really are losers and are not worth it. Is it too much to ask to find someone who is smart, fun, funny, sexy, has a good job, is educated and knows how treat a girl? OP, if you find them , let me know where they are!
Trialbyfire Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 We give the green light to men/women who we're attracted to. If you feel you're solely attracting losers, why is that? Is it because you focus solely on the negative or is it something within you that draws/needs this type of guy?
Jersey Shortie Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 Ok I've never tried to ask anyone out at the gym... I'm always in, workout, out. It kind of seems cliche to me, are women ok in general with being approached at the gym? It seems kind of unnatural to me for some reason. Specially in the classes that I take it's almost like everyone is there but nobody really aknowledges anyone else. It's eerily devoid of emotion. Well, I dont think you should hit on her if she is on the treadmill working it out. But if you see her regularly, even if you take a class with her and give her a smile and hello as a start, you never know. It's not the best place in the world but there is one guy there I like that I wouldn't mind asking me out. There is also a cafe place in the gym that sometimes I see him at. He could easily say hi in there instead of in the actual gym floor. Personally, there are pluses and minuses in any social setting to ask someone out...in a bar people can be drunk or not serious, online they can be just looking to date a million people, in the gym it can be weird..and so on. Is there ever a really great place to meet someone or a bad place to meet someone new? I don't think any place is really "bad", different situations just have different obsticles.
lovestruck818 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 We give the green light to men/women who we're attracted to. If you feel you're solely attracting losers, why is that? Is it because you focus solely on the negative or is it something within you that draws/needs this type of guy? it's b/c men are slime
Trialbyfire Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 it's b/c men are slime So you believe all men are slime? Haven't you ever met any men who were awesome? Take away the romantic component and look at every man who's had impact in your life like male relatives, friends, coworkers and bosses. Are they all slime?
coffeemaker Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 (No, I will not stare at your rack Ms. Hottie when you're giving off red flags!red flag or not, doesn't mean you can't enjoy the scenery. Just don't expect anything from it. It's like taking a stroll through a beautiful garden. You don't demand anything from the garden, just appreciate it for what it is. lol.
lovestruck818 Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 So you believe all men are slime? Haven't you ever met any men who were awesome? Take away the romantic component and look at every man who's had impact in your life like male relatives, friends, coworkers and bosses. Are they all slime? well, no, but I obv would not date those people...anyonme who i have come in contact with to "date" has been slime.
Trialbyfire Posted August 30, 2008 Posted August 30, 2008 well, no, but I obv would not date those people...anyonme who i have come in contact with to "date" has been slime. So then, why is that? You've admitted to knowing amazing men, so you know they exist. Why is it only affecting your dating life?
lovestruck818 Posted September 1, 2008 Posted September 1, 2008 So then, why is that? You've admitted to knowing amazing men, so you know they exist. Why is it only affecting your dating life? b/c men just want sex.
Trialbyfire Posted September 1, 2008 Posted September 1, 2008 b/c men just want sex. lovestruck, we both know there are men out there who are relationship style men. Sure, all men want to get laid by women they're dating but for many of them, that's not all they want. You're hurting right now, fresh out of a relationship that wasn't going in the direction you needed. I get that. Just don't let bitterness and mistrust overwhelm what your common sense is telling you.
Mako482 Posted September 1, 2008 Posted September 1, 2008 Funny, I am saying I'm so sick of lying bitches.
MN randomguy Posted September 4, 2008 Posted September 4, 2008 So, ladies What kind of feedback are you giving to which behaviors. If a guy wrongs you there's nothing wrong with publicly berating and destroying HIM. I think a lot of the problem is that women in this country have quit judging men as individuals. Guys do what they see other guys getting results doing. Another point. The previous advice will change the people who choose to associate with you. You CANNOT change another person. If a guy is a douche immediately distance and destroy. You'll feel like you have to save him, whatever. That's just your emotions. Use your brain its your brain that makes you different than an animal. This whole blah, blah, men are pigs crap is misdirected hostility. Properly direct your hostility.
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