I broke up with him nearly 6 months ago now I cant eat sleep all I think of is him!!.

[sparkleson]

Hey Ill try make this short...

 

Basically I was living with my boyfriend and but he never wanted to do anything like go for walks go to cinema go out with my friends or his really,we kinda went out when he felt , I was constantly feeling regetted by him.I always iniateted sex , would never kiss me in front of his friends and never told me he loved me, it was like we where best friends we talked all day every day but there didnt seem to be emotion there, is this normal? Friends of mine would have a dinner and he wouldnt go he didnt like them it was all couply and "gay" then at christmas he wouldnt call in he hated talkin to other people , im very social he's not at all..But i fancy the pants off him...But I felt like i was the one doing all things, on valentines day his card said from not love..He never made an effort to show his effections at all he said i wouldnt be here if i didnt want to, then at the wkend he use to just make his plans and that was that he never said hey what are we doin this wkend do you mind if i head up north it was jus im headin up north he jus always expected me to be there when he wanted and I was.... THEN i said i need a break he said he didnt want to break but i couldn continue like this, I left and broke up, he found out i went on a date a few weeks later and went MAD I said we broke up you made NO effort to get back wha do you expect, he said im hardly goin to run after you.... We have talked EVERY DAY since its now six months later and i miss him soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much i asked him to get back in june he said no it was too late, i said ok then a few weeks ago i mentioned it again,anytime i ask him to do something he said he is too busy, we have seen each other a few times but we still talk everyday and i texted him the other day and said are we still jus friends ( this was the day after he came up here and had a chinese and we cuddled all day) he said yea....I'm really confused......HELP...What do i do? Is he just ringing me cause he is bored, why doesnt he want me back as his gf?

[sultry33]

this relationship is all about him... what do you get out of it?

 

seems he is afraid of commitment and you being there in some way is a ok for him..

 

cannot understand why you put up with it.. just because you fancy him..

 

cut him off and meet someone who will treat you like a gf not a buddy;)

you do deserve much better x

[yongyong]

Looks like same thing will happen if you guys get back together.

 

He didn't give you enough attention and now you are chasing him.

He has power over you and do you think he's going to give you more attention?

[sparkleson]

To be honest I have way too much time on my hands, I have been out of work since march as I have breast cancer so at the moment im going through treatment.. He said he is being here for me while I go through my chemo but I think its making things harder talking to him everyday because we are getting on like a house on fire and then thats when I miss him and get frustrated..I start thinkin he likes me again..Am I better off just cutting all contact now?I'm so anxious at the moment..The thing is he wont meet with me and only wants to talk to me, I think I may be just filling the void for him too I just dont know what he is thinking, but he did say to me today that we should "cut back " for a while talkin so there is no mixed signals..I said i thought this was a good idea.. I really need to just get on with things if I dont contact him for the next week or two it should be fine, Id nearly change my number...Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...

[sid3]

Girl, you need to worry about one thing right now. You! Seriously, although it's hard getting over an ex, and hoping to get back together with them having become better, take a break for right now. You are all that matters. get through your treatments. the most important thing you can do right now is cut out any and all stress from your life the best you can. You have to get healthy and strong when your treatments are finished. There will be other chances at love whether it's with this guy or another one, but for now free your mind of such worries so you can have the best recovery possible. There are times in a person's life when it's ok to be selfish, it's all about you and getting better for the time being.

[sparkleson]

Thank sid :-) I know all this he had just being giving me mixed signals and ya know it didnt matter to me if we where just friends that was fine but not the mixed signals thats just mean so yea and you know what if he really cared or gave that much of a crap he would of let me know by now..I think though i have never given it time to rest and now is the time for me to rest and for the whole relationship to rest and time will tell whats meant to happen...:-) Things happen for a reason..Whats meant to be is meant to be an all that...

[sid3]

Your right, the mixed messages are a cruel thing. Most people would prefer flat out rejection. Getting a little bit of the good keeps are mind wondering and makes us not willing to boot them for the bad. Often it's really the other person's issues, and we have no control over their hot/cold behaviors. A lot of people will say it just means low interest level, but I don't by it. All you can do is look out for number one right now. Sounds like your thinking positively.

[sparkleson]

Yea i dont know I think we havent really given each other enough time to MOVE on, but he never really wanted to talk about it and when we did it would turn into a fight,i know its been six months but we have talked for nearly the six months every day 2/3 times a day and at the beginning I had so much on my mind I was over him to be honest but then he was ringin me everyday..

 

Anyway I do think he is interested but he just doesnt know what he wants and so much has happened now and i kept pushin him and pushin him when i should of left him.. I will now, this has been what has happened to me in past relationships I have gone on so far and then one day simply gave up..Then they have come back begging when its been far too late, I can see this as another case!!..Ha ha ah well..Not my problem..I think i may jus switch off my phone for the next while so that if he does ring through that i dont see it and if its off i wont keep lookin at the damn thing.. Its easier to keep busy and mind off when your working I just have too much time to think but your right I know I have to look after me and I know im number one, I just was getting confused with the whole hot and cold hot and cold and he would call when he felt or if I didnt text back he would be all HELLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooo,if he didnt care why would he care if i text back or not is it a control thing?..This was the way it went when i said do you wanna call in he said no but if he asked me id be up there like a shot, and he knows this..So now its time to say no and move on get my treatments finished walk everyday get myself looking hot for when my hair grows back and then I can get out there, find myself now and then ill know what im looking for,I've never been single for more than a few months so im not use to being on my ownn ownn so i think i just need to realise that i can live by myself and stop being so dependable on others for my happiness... Ok i better stop writing ha ha ha thanks though you are right...Im goin to stay positive, i am a positive person I dont need someone who is goin to be like that with me and its really always been the way..He does what he wants when he wants..