mortensorchid Posted August 27, 2008 Posted August 27, 2008 Well I got closure on the cake man at last. This was all done via text message and email no less. Last night I was out to dinner with a friend when I got a text message from the Cake Man (you remember, the one I had baked a cake for his birthday last Sunday who I ended up eating with some other friends). He said that he was sending me a letter via email. Now that PISSED ME OFF!!! Not that this is the first time (and will no doubt be the last) that someone has done this, I texted him back and said "What, you can't call me YOU BIG COWARD". He said that he wouldn't be able to get a word in edgewise over the phone let alone face to face so this was safer. I get to the computer and read the email. He said he freaked out. He didn't want to make another mistake like he had in the past (with one gf he was with for 3 years, the other for 5). He said we had become serious very quickly since meeting 2 months ago and was afraid that I would be like those other women. These other women, just for the record, stole his credit cards out of his wallet, both had kids from previous relationships that he was Daddy to, and tried to get him to move out to the respectable suburbs. What did I ever do or say that would make him think I would do something like that?! He said on his birthday that he went into hermit mode and locked himself up in the house. He said he thinks that he wasted his life and he's damaged from his past mistakes. I see exactly why - because he won't allow himself to get over it. I was furious over this, called him a coward. But I wrote back and said that if that's the way you feel, then there's no point in my trying to convince you otherwise. I have half the cake still left. Anyone want to come over and help me put it away?
almost famous Posted August 28, 2008 Posted August 28, 2008 He sounds like kind of a loser. A daddy two two kids from two different moms? You don't want that. I think he's right about himself.
itgirlragdoll Posted August 28, 2008 Posted August 28, 2008 He sounds like kind of a loser. A daddy two two kids from two different moms? You don't want that. I think he's right about himself. I think she meant the women had the kids already from previous relationships of theirs. Regardless, it's either a warning sign that he is, in fact, a mess, as almost famous had indicated; or a cowardly, half-assed bull**** excuse for breaking up with you. Either way, forget about him.
Trialbyfire Posted August 28, 2008 Posted August 28, 2008 When someone has to pay extra when boarding a flight due to emotional baggage, consider yourself lucky to be the one who got away. Imagine if you got more serious with him, then had him run, leaving you standing at the altar.
almost famous Posted August 28, 2008 Posted August 28, 2008 Oh, OK. It sounds like he was putting on a fascade for these women acting as "daddy" to their kids. It sounds like he probably wouldn't want to settle down and have kids and a meaningful relationship anyway.
whichwayisup Posted August 28, 2008 Posted August 28, 2008 What did I ever do or say that would make him think I would do something like that?! You didn't..But his fears are his fears. Obviously his past is affecting him now. He also should have told you he wanted to be alone on his birthday. Anyway, I don't know much about your relationship with him but it sounds like he needs some counselling to help him get over his past hurts and present fears.
whichwayisup Posted August 28, 2008 Posted August 28, 2008 He said we had become serious very quickly since meeting 2 months ago and was afraid that I would be like those other women. And this is something HE needs to look at within himself. Maybe he'll learn to take it slow and really get to know the other person instead of running off to the hills when he has doubts and worry's.
Arise_Serpentor Posted August 28, 2008 Posted August 28, 2008 Anybody that ends ANYTHING from email alone is a total coward and loser!!! Even over the phone is better than that! You are better off!!!
Meaplus3 Posted August 28, 2008 Posted August 28, 2008 Well I got closure on the cake man at last. This was all done via text message and email no less. Last night I was out to dinner with a friend when I got a text message from the Cake Man (you remember, the one I had baked a cake for his birthday last Sunday who I ended up eating with some other friends). He said that he was sending me a letter via email. Now that PISSED ME OFF!!! Not that this is the first time (and will no doubt be the last) that someone has done this, I texted him back and said "What, you can't call me YOU BIG COWARD". He said that he wouldn't be able to get a word in edgewise over the phone let alone face to face so this was safer. I get to the computer and read the email. He said he freaked out. He didn't want to make another mistake like he had in the past (with one gf he was with for 3 years, the other for 5). He said we had become serious very quickly since meeting 2 months ago and was afraid that I would be like those other women. These other women, just for the record, stole his credit cards out of his wallet, both had kids from previous relationships that he was Daddy to, and tried to get him to move out to the respectable suburbs. What did I ever do or say that would make him think I would do something like that?! He said on his birthday that he went into hermit mode and locked himself up in the house. He said he thinks that he wasted his life and he's damaged from his past mistakes. I see exactly why - because he won't allow himself to get over it. I was furious over this, called him a coward. But I wrote back and said that if that's the way you feel, then there's no point in my trying to convince you otherwise. I have half the cake still left. Anyone want to come over and help me put it away? He does sound like a coward. Why even send an email?? He could have just simply Vanished without any reason at all.. the way Big Losers do it. I'd be glad your rid of him.. you deserve better. Hang in there. AP:)
Author mortensorchid Posted September 7, 2008 Author Posted September 7, 2008 Just for the record, finished the last of the cake last night. It was delicious.
Fritz The Cat Posted September 7, 2008 Posted September 7, 2008 Yea, he does sound like a loser. But nobody is totally baggage free. Make sure you're aware of ALL the baggage someone is carrying before you get serious with them. Nothing like discovering an unforgivable detail after you've emotionally committed to load you up with baggage also. Hope this makes sense.
djhall Posted September 7, 2008 Posted September 7, 2008 (you remember, the one I had baked a cake for his birthday last Sunday who I ended up eating with some other friends) That sentence... are you sure you didn't mean, "which I ended up eating with some other friends?" "Who I ended up eating with some other friends," sounds like one hell of a birthday present!
Author mortensorchid Posted September 30, 2008 Author Posted September 30, 2008 That sentence... are you sure you didn't mean, "which I ended up eating with some other friends?" "Who I ended up eating with some other friends," sounds like one hell of a birthday present! Oh yeah ... My bad! WHICH was the right word. How embarassing.
RecordProducer Posted September 30, 2008 Posted September 30, 2008 Yea, he does sound like a loser. But nobody is totally baggage free. Make sure you're aware of ALL the baggage someone is carrying before you get serious with them. Nothing like discovering an unforgivable detail after you've emotionally committed to load you up with baggage also. Hope this makes sense.Very much! If you're looking for a baggage-free person, you will find a good pretender. OP, sorry about the way you got the closure. In any case, there is nthing you can do, so move on. The best you can do is show him that you don't care: don't call or emial him. If he contacts you, brush him off quickly and politely. It will really make you feel better.
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