pandagirl Posted August 27, 2008 Posted August 27, 2008 I totally don't want to though. I'm tired and cranky and not feeling my usual witty, charming self. I feel silly putting on mascara when I just want to lay on my couch and watch my recorded episode of Mad Men. Who else feels like dating is a chore? Or am I just a sourpuss?
alphamale Posted August 27, 2008 Posted August 27, 2008 Who else feels like dating is a chore? Or am I just a sourpuss? you must not be into this dude that much. when someone really likes someone they look forward to dates with them and can't wait to see them. maybe you should call him and cancel by telling him you have to wash your hair or something
Author pandagirl Posted August 27, 2008 Author Posted August 27, 2008 No, this is a first date off a dating site, so I always go into these things being a negative Nancy! It's only third online date ever.
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted August 27, 2008 Posted August 27, 2008 Where did you meet this guy? You don't sound thrilled, that's for sure. I get it. It sure can get old some time. I have to be in the right mood to want to be funny and charming.
alphamale Posted August 27, 2008 Posted August 27, 2008 No, this is a first date off a dating site, so I always go into these things being a negative Nancy! It's only third online date ever. I think you may want to seriously look at alternative methods to meeting men besides the internet. Meeting people for romance online is pretty much a futile effort...but you never know
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted August 27, 2008 Posted August 27, 2008 PandaGirl, read my thread on the Bad Speller. Third online date, and it went pretty well.
Author pandagirl Posted August 27, 2008 Author Posted August 27, 2008 Where did you meet this guy? You don't sound thrilled, that's for sure. I get it. It sure can get old some time. I have to be in the right mood to want to be funny and charming. Well, I'm just unmotivated to date, in general, but I have to force myself. The last online date I went out on, I actually hit it off with the guy and we dated for a month. He was actually an awesome guy. Which is why I'm hesitant that I'm going to bat two for two!
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted August 27, 2008 Posted August 27, 2008 If you feel unmotivated to date, why not take a break? Tell yourself that you are going to focus on other things for say, three months. I took a break recently because I was just tired of the crap.
Trialbyfire Posted August 27, 2008 Posted August 27, 2008 Haha...sourpuss! Date when you feel like it. Don't date when you don't. As long as you're still socializing with people, dating isn't a necessity. For that matter, you might meet someone while socializing, which would be the best way to do it, since you get to meet them face-to-face first. I took a dating break, trying to figure myself out. There was no way I would consider dating without knowing what was going on internally. Got the Eureka moment the other day. Now, I'm ready to go out and date again.
Author pandagirl Posted August 27, 2008 Author Posted August 27, 2008 OK. so I'm back from the date. Zero chemistry both personality wise and physically. TOTALLY nice guy, but we just didn't click. Of course, he wants to go out again...ugh, the pain of being a relatively attractive woman with a good personality. haha! So, the reason why I am "forcing" myself to date, is because in the past, I've always been very adverse to dating and relationships. It's almost like homework to go out on dates for me. But, now I'm just kind of bummed. That last guy I dated was also an online dating venture, and whereas we didn't end up being romantically right for each other in the sense of a LTR, we just clicked amazingly. Even taking out the romantic/sexual aspect, our personalities, senses of humor, the way we could always have fun and laugh...there was just tons of chemistry in that regard. It makes me miss him a lot and also makes me realize that kind of chemistry is so rare. Of course, I will continue feeling this way until something better comes along, but in the meantime, it's a reminder how he isn't in my life anymore.
Jilly Bean Posted August 27, 2008 Posted August 27, 2008 PG, FWIW, I'm glad he's out of your life. I thought he was manipulative of your feelings, so I proud of you for moving on! And rather than force it, why not just take a break for now? If you're not into it, you could be dismissing someone you may not want to in another month...
Author pandagirl Posted August 27, 2008 Author Posted August 27, 2008 Aw, thanks JB! I mean, I'm over the ex. I don't have romantic feelings toward him anymore, but I truly miss knowing him and having him in my life. And it's not my heart playing tricks on me. He just GOT me. Our personalities were in love with each other! haha. If we could be friends, I would totally welcome it. As for dating, I think I'm ixnaying the online stuff for a bit. This sounds really bitchy of me, but I think the dating world consists of a lot of lonely, borderline desperate people, looking to couple up, with the attitude of: "This person is good enough. I'll date them for however long until I find something better or get bored." I just can't do that!
Jilly Bean Posted August 27, 2008 Posted August 27, 2008 I don't disagree, PG. And I know you really felt for him and that it was a big disappoint. I'm not trying to negate that - he was just not worthy. lol Online dating can be a VERY tricky world. You have to have a lot of backbone to deal with it, and I can see why you're not in the mood. It's harder because you really connected with the other guy. Just makes all the really average guys seem LESS than average - lol.
Author pandagirl Posted August 27, 2008 Author Posted August 27, 2008 I agree he was not worthy, that's why I've been able to move on! Someone who can't appreciate me either as a lover or friend, doesn't get to have me, and I don't want them either. Laws of dating physics! I feel like online dating is a good place for people who just want to hook-up, date random people, or really looking for a relationship. I don't fit into any of those categories. I'm more of a: I will go living my life and it will happen, when it happens. I can't do "average." There's nothing WORSE than average, in my opinion. I feel like my personality is so particular and weird that only certain people get me. And my ex got me. I really connected with him on, not really in a romantic/emotional level, but on a cerebral/friendship level. In some ways, I wish we were never so attracted to each other, because I'd at least have him as a friend. But I'm not sad. Just...disappointed in a general sense.
engravefeelthevoid Posted August 27, 2008 Posted August 27, 2008 GET UR ASS UP AND GO FOR THE DAMN DATE !!!! DON'T BE A COUCH POTATO !!!!!!!! MANY PEOPLE HAVE A HARD TIME GETTING A DAET AND UR TAKING THINGS FOR GRANTED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!DATE HIM..DATE HIM ! DATE HIMMMMMMMM!!!!!
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