lovestruck818 Posted November 25, 2008 Posted November 25, 2008 Pxranger - Sorry but your situation isn't that same as mine. I am chooseing to have a baby without a man. Your father chose not to be part of your life, that alone probably took a big toll on you. I am working my butt off now, so i don't have to work when i have my babies. I will stay home with them until they go to school. So my kids will have all their mothers love 24/7, not someone else's. I don't think its shelfish at all! I am making the best of what god gave me & bringing a life into this world to love unconditonally!!! There is nothing selfish about that if u ask me. Yes of course its best to have a child with a mom and a dad, but that might not happen for me, so i have to make the best of it. I REFUSE to just let my childbearing years pass! I will regret it if i don't have kids! Lizzie - Thanks, u were always backing me up! I will go for it when the time is right :-) If you don't work, how are you going to have money to support your child? Wow, I'm sorry, I just don't think you have the maturity level to have a kid. Obviously if you are single parent you will need to work. Money is not handed out like candy on halloween...and if money is not coming in on a steady basis, the money that you have "worked your butt off" for will deplete in time. Money saved does not last forever- children are expensive.
Author MarieD Posted November 25, 2008 Author Posted November 25, 2008 Lovestruck, there is no reason to be rude! Why do I have the maturity level of a kid? Hello, but I won't have to work!! But if you thought about it. If i save all I can now & have been saving in the past, & am a single parent I won't have to work later on when the baby is born. My goal is to have $400,000 saved by the time i go through with my plan & i won't need to work for a few years & raise my babies. Some people never see that much money in an entire life time, but since I work & saved my entire life I will see it at 37 years old.
lovestruck818 Posted November 25, 2008 Posted November 25, 2008 Lovestruck, there is no reason to be rude! Why do I have the maturity level of a kid? Hello, but I won't have to work!! But if you thought about it. If i save all I can now & have been saving in the past, & am a single parent I won't have to work later on when the baby is born. My goal is to have $400,000 saved by the time i go through with my plan & i won't need to work for a few years & raise my babies. Some people never see that much money in an entire life time, but since I work & saved my entire life I will see it at 37 years old. Most people don't see that kind of money b/c they are not 35 years old and still living at home. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with that- I am saying that I am 26 and I own a home so that is why I do not have much money saved...as most of us prob do not. Most people move out, buy houses (or rent) and don't save all their money- it's just not reality or commonplace. I think you are living in a warped world that is not reality. You will see the money deplete and deplete and deplete- diapers, food, doctor visits- wait & see. Not trying to be rude, just telling you what reality is like.
Author MarieD Posted November 25, 2008 Author Posted November 25, 2008 AND most people don't have the Plan B that i have!!! If i didn't plan to have kids, i would go out & buy my own house!!! I am not even going to go there with you again!! Everyone else has a different plan than i do. And my plan is not warped, its MY plan, no one elses. I am LUCKY that i have the option to live home & save so i can plan for my babies. Not everyone is lucky enough like I am. I could go out & buy a house, etc, BUT because of my Plan B, is why I am living home & give up buying a house & live on my own SO I CAN have my kids & stay home & raise them on my own. Having kids & being able to stay home & raise them is MUCH more important to me than going out & buying a house, sorry. My priorities are somewhere else than the normal persons. U can't compare! Just because my goal is different than yours & other peoples doesn't mean it is wrong. I have a different plan than everyone else!!
LovieDove24 Posted December 4, 2008 Posted December 4, 2008 No one else has to live your life but YOU and I believe if you have a dream you should just go for it and to hell with what everyone else thinks. There is nothing wrong with wanting a child. Most women do and I honestly think it is smart of you to admit you meet scummy men and would prefer being single (I'm starting to head down that road myself!). Many women settle for a so-so guy for the sake of having a family and just because you won't do that doesnt mean you should apologize for it. With all that being said, I will tell you this: I am a single mama and it is DAMN HARD. Not impossible but full of stress and lack of support. Oh sure my family lives nearby but they are certainly not there with me at 2 in the morning. And the once or twice a week that they DO visit you better believe they're handing her right back over to me the minute she starts crying. Having family around is NOT the same as having a loving and supporting partner....I went to the childbirthing classes with my mom and got a tear when I saw the supportive husbands rubbing their wives back. When I am dragging all of my babies bags, stroller, car seat down the driveway you better believe I'm wishing I had a man's help. When I am having to take Christmas pictures you better believe I am wishing there was a daddy in there with us. Just don't be surprised if you find yourself being jealous of mommies who have husbands who help. I didnt think I'd need it either but when you are crying along with your baby at 3 in the morning believe me, you will understand.
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