MayraPelayo Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 This emotion causes so many problems in a relationship so many. Yet it is something that is hard to control.. Here goes my story. I am dating a very handsome man that is in love with me, just a small description of him he is tall slender or athletic (that's what he calls it when I say he is skinny lol) well he has an amazing body carries himself very well and dresses very nice. He has hazel greenish eyes with big lips and dirty blonde hair (he's serbian). Everyone in his family looks straight out of a magazine it trips me out some times you know. Well on my end I am one sexy ass woman but I am very volumptious (i know I spelled that wrong lol) I am about 5'4" weighing 160 I have shoulder length hair beautiful big dark eyes and well coming from him, an angel face... Now I know that I am not bad looking and I always get praises for my look, He is a very jealous man i mean very... and to be honest I wasn't really a jealous person but some of his thoughts have made me somewhat insecure with myself you know. I stopped working out because he didn't want me to lose weight (i think it's because of his insecurities) so I took it into consideration and didn't gain weight but stop caring for myself as much. Well I started noticing all the women that like stare at him when i am with him, something that never bothered me you know. Well I hit like an all time high, I mean I started up fights over stupid nonsense because my jealousy was very overcomming we stopped talking for about a week or so. We would still check up on each other but no conversations like before. Well now I am at a point where I feel the need to get jealous but I really dont care anymore... He tells me that I have nothing to worry about and one thing I love about this man he has always been genuine with me since day one... He is a very amazing man but on his end the jealousy is always high... I started working out again and i feel better about myself but I sometimes feel the need to get jealous why is that does anyone know... I hope this made sense I suck at expressing myself in writing lol...
dazed.1 Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 Hey I know jealousy and insecurity all to much, but I have really starting to deal with it and get over it and let me say that quitting working out is probably the worst thing you could have done. I mean not because you might put on weight or maybe you stop looking as good as you once did, but because it really helps with self esteem and stress relief. I'm sure you feel it too right? When you work out you just FEEL GOOD. I believe that mental health and physical health have a lot to do with each other. That being said, it is the both of you that have these issues right? Then you both need to work on becoming more secure and improving your own self esteem. Conforming to an insecure person because it temporarily fixes the problem is actually making the situation worse, the insecure party never learns to deal with emotions of anxiety: I know bc my bf always did that, until he realized I was becoming a monster lol! The jealousy seems to be related to the other person but it is not, it is a personal battle that each of you will have to overcome. Does that make any sense? Good luck with it.
norajane Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 Jealousy is a fear of losing someone - it is that fear that causes jealousy. Is he doing anything that causes you to fear you might lose him? Does he flirt with women in front of you? Does he often turn around to look at a pretty woman walking by? Does he spend too much time talking to other women at parties or something? Is it HIS jealousy that is causing you to be paranoid? If he's not doing those things and he is reassuring you, then your fear is caused by your own insecurities. Have other men made you jealous? Have you been cheated on? Has your parents' relationship, or your friends' relationships made you insecure that men aren't reliable? Dig deeper in your thinking - everyone gets jealous from time to time, but if you are constantly jealous, there's something causing the situation.
Author MayraPelayo Posted August 27, 2008 Author Posted August 27, 2008 Na he is an awesome man, he never really made me feel ugly always telling me he thinks i am the most beautiful and sexiest woman alive, and when we go out he doesn't pay attention to the woman that stare at him... I swear they don't even acknowledge I'm with him ****en bitches lol... thanks for the response to you both! =)
lovestruck818 Posted August 27, 2008 Posted August 27, 2008 Jelousy is a terrible disease- get well soon!
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