me007 Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 Has anyone been successful in getting an ex back? winning back probably isn't the right phrase since they aren't a prize, but you know what I mean. Does everyone just give up when the other says it's over? There are so many books out there that say they have gotten couples back together... I'm sure pressuring, begging and being clingy don't help, right? anyone here have any strategies to talk to the other one to warm them back up into giving the relationship another chance?
foxh1234 Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 Hi, it has been said a million times but I will say it again. You cannot make someone love you or want you, no matter what you do. If they broke up with you, give them space and disappear for awhile. If they want you again, they will find you. In the mean time, move on. Why chase someone that doesn't want you ?
0hpenelope Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 Hi, it has been said a million times but I will say it again. You cannot make someone love you or want you, no matter what you do. If they broke up with you, give them space and disappear for awhile. If they want you again, they will find you. In the mean time, move on. Why chase someone that doesn't want you ? Preach it, brother fox. me007, listen to this one. He knows... he knows what he's talking about.
tomwiz Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 I guess you could say I did. We broke up in early september of last year. I was an annoying, doing all the wrong things kind of guy (begging etc) for a couple of weeks. Found my footing, lost some weight, quit smoking and basically considered the relationship a lost cause. Dated another girl for a period of time, she would occasionally contact me but I never made first contact. I broke up with the "new girl" in early march after dating her about 3-4 months. On St Pattys date I happened to see the ex, we were friendly but not much oter than that. About in april we started talking more, and by the end of may we were back together. Its not so much about winning them back as much as becoming the person that they fell in love with again and more importantly, the best you can be, I lost myself, let myself go and was not treating her right. She saw what else was out there as well during hte time.
dazed.1 Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 Has anyone been successful in getting an ex back? winning back probably isn't the right phrase since they aren't a prize, but you know what I mean. Does everyone just give up when the other says it's over? There are so many books out there that say they have gotten couples back together... I'm sure pressuring, begging and being clingy don't help, right? anyone here have any strategies to talk to the other one to warm them back up into giving the relationship another chance? Actually my bf ended it and he came back to me. We had pretty unique circumstances though: didn't fall out of love, interracial R with family problems (see my other threads). But we are back and happy as, or actually happier than ever!
BCCA Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 Here is the thing, I did but it didnt last. We were together for 3 years, she dumped me and I tried to get her back, and finally at the point of moving on she agreed to come back. That lasted a year or so, and she just bailed again. If you do get another chance you have to realize that whatever was a problem before still is. I personally was just so happy to get her back that I didnt care, but it bit me in the end. The best advice is to say "fine" to the breakup and go on with your life. Maybe theyll come back, maybe youll meet some one new, but you cant control that. As was said already, you cant make some one love you or want to be with you. And people generally dont change.
Treasa Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 My boyfriend and I got back together after breaking up a couple of times. We both really needed to look at the issues, work on ourselves, take it slowly, and start over again. Forgiving and forgetting were mandatory. What worked in our favor is that neither of us cheated on each other, or did anything fundamentally bad to each other. And we missed each other like crazy when we were apart.
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