dreamy1945 Posted August 25, 2008 Posted August 25, 2008 This is just something to ponder...another perspective if you will. Why does the WS have to be in a fog when he's having an affair? Since he has not bee connected with his spouse, why isn't it possible that he is thinking clearly and just fell in love with another person. Also when this happens the first thing that everyone wants him to do is go NC. Does that seem like a forced decision and not a free will one? It seems that being forced back into the marriage all at once that maybe that could be the fog....if he really loved the OW then why can't he be allowed to have contact and express his feelings of sorrow over the whole thing. It seems so cruel just to break it off immediately without an explanation except a NC letter being forced by the marriage partner. I know he is married but doesn't he have free will to make a decision? Hope I don't get flamed for this...just wanting to think about the other side.
Tripped up Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 Marriage Committment Honesty Three words that stand out to me. Not only is the Man in a self created fog, but the woman he is having an affair with is in the fog BIGTIME. What gives her the right to determine what the wife can and cannot do? What gives her the right to even think twice about a married man? What if she was the wife, what would she be saying then?
Author dreamy1945 Posted August 26, 2008 Author Posted August 26, 2008 Does the wife have that "right" when she has totally ignored and withdrew from her husband long before the affair?
BCCA Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 Does the wife have that "right" when she has totally ignored and withdrew from her husband long before the affair? If thats the case, I think divorce would be the answer. There is no excuse for cheating or affairs. They are avoidable. Dont want to be with some one? Leave, plain and simple.
Tripped up Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 I think it would be quite delusional, that someone who is willing to find another woman while still married, would be giving the OW the wifes side of whats going on. Has he done everything he can to approach his wife? How does the OW know that for a fact? He needs to be man enough to repair the marriage, or start the process of leaving it. Actually, the OW should say exactly that, and then disappear.
BCCA Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 Actually, the OW should say exactly that, and then disappear. Agree 100%
sumdude Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 Does the wife have that "right" when she has totally ignored and withdrew from her husband long before the affair? When you only hear one side of a story you might want to reserve judgement.
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