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Maybe I'm being too picky...


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Posted

Well, I have quite a few girls interested in me, but...I just don't feel it.

 

I don't feel like I'm in love or like them as a girlfriend.

 

I don't know if it's because I just got dumped a few months ago or what.

 

But I feel like I am being too picky. I'm still looking for the perfect girl...which probably wont ever happen. I don't know what the deal is. I should probably choose one before they all lose interest and I have noone.

Posted

Well, there is nothing wrong with being "picky," but it also depends on what your criteria is for a relationship. There's no such thing as perfect.

 

Also, falling in love has to do as much with yourself as it does the other person, if not more. You need to open your heart, see the good in people, want to love.

 

I had an experience a few years ago where I realized I was capable of falling in love with a lot of people. Believe me, I was in your same scenario, but then I had an epiphany and saw that I just needed to open my heart.

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Posted

That's good advice.

but how exactly did you "open your heart".

 

I do want to love.

Posted

Well, there has to be the basics of compatibility, attraction, and genuinely liking the person, but I find we are the only people holding ourselves back from loving someone.

 

I have some friends who fall in love constantly and I always wondered why, but it's because they have no fear, they are excited by people, they want to love.

 

It's a matter of loving yourself, firstly. Also, getting over the fear of making yourself vulnerable to someone else. The mind and heart are powerful things.

 

Sort of like...you know how you want something more when you know you can't have it? It's the desire that drives us.

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Posted

thanks that makes alot of sense.

 

I think it is the fear that is holding me back. You're right I'm the one keeping myself from falling in love.

Posted

Don't get too down on yourself! It's something we all have to grapple with, being vulnerable and all. Just be aware of it and try to work on it. :)

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