CanadianEquestrian Posted August 22, 2008 Posted August 22, 2008 Well, I've always found that writting down my thoughts have worked well, so let's see how it goes here... I went to this amazing summer program, and I met so many awesome people from all over the country and formed bonds that I am sure will never break. There was a particular bond, however, that seems to be on my mind most of the time. There was a guy I met at this camp: the biggest sweetheart I've ever known, and everyone liked him because he was the nicest guy (no joke). It took me a while to realize, but I had completely fallen for him. At first, I was like "a crush, over by the time the week is through". But no, it didn't go away. The last couple weeks of camp I hung out a lot with him, and did a lot of stuff I wouldn't even dare do with another guy, let alone some of my really close female friends. Well, then came the time when we all had to leave, and I almost had the strength to tell him how I felt, but ended up just thanking him for being an awesome friend. We went our seperate ways, which was on complete opposites of the country, and kept close contact through emails. A week passed, and it was still bogging my mind, so I decided to finally tell him how the heck I felt about him. I waited for him to get online, and after preparing myself I let it out. Well, it didn't go so well, as he said he had prior commitments and didn't feel that way about me. Luckily, 2 days later, we were talking (online and through emails) like nothing had happened at all. So now, we email each other atleast once a day, and as I type this, I am talking to him on MSN. I've realized that I do love him, although I'm somewhat confused as to which way, and if it's truly legit. I'd like to be able to say he's like a brother (there's another guy from camp I call that, and I love him like a brother), but somehow that just doesn't feel right. When I really have nothing to do (or sitting in the immediate vacinity of a computer) I always want to check the computer and see if he's emailed me. I've never been this attached to someone before, EVER, and I'm very worried that I'm obessessed with him. I followed him everywhere at camp, and was always looking for him. We have both said that we love one another, but it wasn't uncommon to hear that between many people at this camp (we were all really close). It's been a month since I've seen him in person, but I feel as strongly about him as I did when I was with him, even though he's told me that he doesn't return the feelings... I'm hoping I'll get over the attraction soon, but I want to remain his friend, cause he's an amazing guy; and the first guy I can openly admit that I love.
4dviceJunki3 Posted August 22, 2008 Posted August 22, 2008 I'm sorry things didn't go your way but we've all been in this position before. I met an amazing girl a while back and I swear, the phrase "Love at first site" really felt into place for me. I mean, I didn't want to hook up with this girl, I wanted to BE with this girl. The more I got to know her, the more I ended up falling for her. You have to realize that these sorts of things come in and out of our lives and when it's something new, it's exciting, your ambition towards it goes. It's built naturally in your system to want something that excites you. This guy may have been the nicest person you ever met; however, you have to let yourself know that more people like him will cross your path. Just don't go chasing after it because if you do, you may end up in dismay. It's best to tell the person which I regret not doing when I first had this experience; however, my situation was a bit different because she was already dating some guy. Anyways, don't take it so hard on yourself; stay positive because you will find someone just like him in the future. Hell, now that you've told him, that thought will linger in his head and he may change his mind and something with him might happen in the future. Just keep in touch and try to not let your emotions get too involved.
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