Jay34 Posted August 28, 2008 Posted August 28, 2008 i would stick with the not contacting her and don't be available and don't let her think you are waiting, i am kind of going through the same thing but i broke up with her when she said she didn't know if she should be in a relationship, i tried to rationalize for a while but i realized that i can't make it seem like i'm around for her, she decided way before i said goodbye that it was over, she just could be keeping you around until she finds an escape plan.
Author confused..... Posted August 28, 2008 Author Posted August 28, 2008 Thing is I'm seeing her tomorrow....
Lishy Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 Good Go and see her tomorrow If she is being cold you need to put your cards on the table and tell her you will move on with your life and date others and cannot guarantee you will be there if and when she beckons Dont be a lap dog, women hate men like that!
almost famous Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 Look at it this way....she was in a relationship with you which was supposedly perfect and you were both so in love, yet she made the decision to move 2 hours away from you. When you're really in it with a person for the long haul, you're not moving 2 hours away from them. This is not a good relationship strategy. Her heart really isn't in this, I'm afraid. when I am really into someone, I would never tell them I needed a break. That means she is not really sure about her feelings for you or she really has met another guy. Sorry.
Author confused..... Posted August 29, 2008 Author Posted August 29, 2008 You can't put life on hold just because you are in a relationship...Sorry, sometimes you have to do what is best for you (and your kids in this case), and this was what was best for her. As a loving bf I supported her, far be it from me to stop them from doing what is best. And yes I have never felt a "break" was necessary, but sometimes, and I truly believe this life over takes you and you need to step aside and handle things. Again I know I am being defensive, and clearly you are trying to help. Im just following my heart and gut...the gut is never wrong. But I appreciate your feedback and they are all valid points.
Author confused..... Posted August 29, 2008 Author Posted August 29, 2008 So it was not ANOTHER guy as all had previously thought, it was "right person,wrong time". She needs to work on her own life right, take care of her kids, go back to school, and she is determined to do so. She loves me so much, but she needs time to help her know if she is "in love with me". She wants us both to not settle and then regret eachother. SHe did admit her insecurities that I would possible one day leave because I was not sure of what I wanted. Truth be told...I would never do so. And she does know that but I can't convince her of that. If we are meant to be then we will be. But right now she cannot give us 100% and it would not be fair to either of us. So I will pick up and move on and one day possibly be with this woman..she truly was...the one.
Yamaha Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 So it was not ANOTHER guy as all had previously thought, it was "right person,wrong time". She needs to work on her own life right, take care of her kids, go back to school, and she is determined to do so. She loves me so much, but she needs time to help her know if she is "in love with me". She wants us both to not settle and then regret eachother. SHe did admit her insecurities that I would possible one day leave because I was not sure of what I wanted. Truth be told...I would never do so. And she does know that but I can't convince her of that. If we are meant to be then we will be. But right now she cannot give us 100% and it would not be fair to either of us. So I will pick up and move on and one day possibly be with this woman..she truly was...the one. Man, she is good. Women use this so to spare your feelings but don't mistake her message- she doesn't want to be with you. If you love someone that much you will do whatever to be with them. She has decided you are not the one for her but she is being nice about letting you down. Let her go and deal with the pain.
almost famous Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 No offense but she is not going to tell you it is another guy at this point. She will spare your feelings, she doesn't want to be with you and if she loved you she wouldn't have moved away from you.
shockandawed Posted August 29, 2008 Posted August 29, 2008 Man, she is good. Women use this so to spare your feelings but don't mistake her message- she doesn't want to be with you. If you love someone that much you will do whatever to be with them. She has decided you are not the one for her but she is being nice about letting you down. Let her go and deal with the pain. Yamaha is right on here. Like I said previously, none of us know her true reasons, but the fact is she doesn't have it for you any longer. There are many people who raise their kids, go to school and hold down a job and still manage to have a relationship. Maybe your dates consists of helping her do her homework at Starbucks, or watching movies with the kids, but unless you are some needy guy who demands too much of her time, then this is a giant cop out on her part. I'm sorry and I know it hurts, but when you do find THE ONE, she won't play these games with you. Best of luck in moving on with your life.
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