VAmama Posted August 20, 2008 Posted August 20, 2008 So, my ex and I met on Match. I'm a huge advocate for it. The past 10 days..... a couple of times I have looked through the Match profiles again. Not b/c I'm looking for my ex.... or even that I'm interested in finding someone right now. I am no where near there right now. But.... I just need to feel hope that there are other men out there that I may find interesting and intriguing again one day... just like I did when I met my ex. I had joined Match orignially b/c my social circle is kind of limited and when I was ready to date again 2 years ago, I thought it was a good way to get beyond my social circle and get to met some different types of guys. Plus, I liked that I could screen people.... anyways, I didn't really have high hopes for it, I thought it was just easy way to ease myself back into the dating field. And low and behold... I met my ex, and it was instant chemistry. I guess I just kind of need the hope that it's possible again one day. I don't want to feel like I missed the opportunity of a lifetime b/c the love of my life is no longer in it..... Does anyone else do this, or feel this way?
sunshinegirl Posted August 20, 2008 Posted August 20, 2008 Yes, I've certainly perused the online sites just ot get a sense of whether there are any good men out there. In the early days I was nowhere near ready to *consider* anyone new. But I'm about 3.5 months post breakup, and I am actually corresponding with four quality guys, all of whom already show signs of being able to communicate and connect better than my ex. I joined an online dating site about a month after the breakup but quickly realized I was in no emotional condition to meet someone new. So I backed off, regrouped, and am now in a place where I can see myself being open to someone new. I still think about my ex frequently - he's been in my dreams almost every night this week - but these four prospects are really giving me hope that I will meet someone great and love again.
frownyface42 Posted August 20, 2008 Posted August 20, 2008 how old are you? i've never used online dating before... i don't really understand it and well think i'm too young to use it and would feel embarrassed if i had to tell people we met online (but i guess thats a lot more acceptable now). im 23... i've cruised some of these sites abd looked at profiles (laughed at a girl who is friends with my ex was on it) but don't think i would ever feel comfortable putting my picture up on one and attempting to meet somone
Author VAmama Posted August 20, 2008 Author Posted August 20, 2008 Hey FF42- I'm 31 now, been when I started using it I was 29. I don't know that I would have at your age; I'll bet most of your friends are still single and you all are pretty active going out still and stuff. For me, I joined when I was 29 b/c most of my friends were married and/or had families, and all were pretty settled into careers (as was I). You get busy with families and careers and it's harder to get out there and met quality people. So I saw online dating as a good avenue to get around some of my lifestyle limitations. I think too, as you get older, you get a little more comfortable in your own skin, and have gone through enough rejection by that point that you don't take it too personally. It's kind of like- if there not interested, it's their loss. But there are some weirdos on the sites, so it's sometimes frustrating to have to screen through some of that....
Author VAmama Posted August 20, 2008 Author Posted August 20, 2008 Sunshine girl- Yeah, it give me hope too that I will met someone great again one day and love again. Of course, I'm still at that point where I'm fearful of getting burned too, so... I'll get there at one point. It's still only been 10 days. But I guess as much as I hope my ex and I could reconcile our issues, I realize that if we can't... I need the hope that there is someone else out there waiting for me too.
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