design_guy Posted August 20, 2008 Posted August 20, 2008 I have been with the same girl now for just over a year. We live approx 4 hours apart and see each other for 2 weekends every month. Yes, we've said "love you" already. I'm happy and not happy at the same time. When we are interacting in person, everything is great most of the time. The distance thing won't be changing for at least another few months. We always have a fantastic time when visiting one another and I am very happy when I am WITH her. .....(cons list) She is very anti-phone and only wants to email. As things are getting more serious this is not an option for me. She has suggested Skype but I can't exactly Skype away from my desk at work. She has free nights on her mobile phone (family plan) but I need those nice 20 minutes conversations during the work day now and then. She makes enough money that a mobile phone plan or prepaid phone won't kill her. I have been telling her to get another mobile for a while now and nothing seems to be happening. Meanwhile there are trust issues. We've talked about it a lot but I have a lot of trouble trusting her. About six months in, she took a trip without telling me to visit her old college. Well, she did tell me she was going to visit her school and friends. But left the important parts out She flew from Atlanta to Texas and primarily visited a guy, "who has a girlfriend". Meanwhile anytime we fight she runs to him (computer/phone) crying. She told me she was "staying with people". I confronted her when she got back and of course she denied anything happened and was very sorry about misleading me. But I still don't trust her or buy the fact she went out there just to be friends with him. She claims this guy is one of her best friends. But six months of dating in I had NEVER heard of him. This incident, while it happened six months ago, still messes with me. That isn't the end. She has guy friends that she's been in contact with for years that she neglects to mention. I saw an email over her shoulder once, "catching up". Additionaly everytime she comes back to my area (where she grew up) she has to get pizza or ice cream with an old-boyfriend. I don't hear about all these guy friends until they call when we are hanging out and I can hear her talking to a guy. Or I see an email, or confront her after a sketchy trip. When we first met, she was dating another guy. Things got started between us before she could get rid of him. Nice track record? In June I mentioned to her I wanted her to be more supportive of a hobby I have. In July she started asking me about a recent outing before getting to her life but I just didn't buy it as she actually caring. It all seemed very fake. We met through a mutual organization we both volunteer for. It is pretty much her only social network at this point and if things end I doubt we are both going to play nice there (I don't want to leave the organization either). I'm not sure what to do.
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