timmay Posted August 19, 2008 Posted August 19, 2008 ok so i had been dating this girl for 5 years + and we broke up six months ago. We talked for a little bit but then i went no contact on her because we would just argue On this past saturday my buddy and I met up with my ex and his ex that are best friends at a club ( I had no part in planning meeting up with my ex. my buddys ex is a good friend of mine so i asked her if she wanted to hang out and she said yes. So i find out that she wants to go to a club and my ex is going to come with her for some reason. So everything goes great, we all have some drinks dance and then we go to a bar and talk about the good times we all had in the past. SO then my ex invites me and my buddy to her house to stay the night. It wasnt supposed to be for sex it is becaues her house was a lot closer then mine from the club. So that night i hook up with my ex and it was great. I definitly know she had a good time because the bed had a nice big wet spot and it definitly wasnt from my boyz So then the next day she goes on the boat with my buddy and his ex even tho she said she wasnt going to go. On the boat she is kinda flirty with me putting he legs on my lap and sitting next to me. Then when we go home i ask her if we can talk for a sec and she is says we dont have anything to talk about and that last night was a mistake. I ask if i could call her and she says if i want to talk i will call you. She walks out the front door to leave w/o saying goodbye so i walk out side and yell goodbye to her. She then turns around and gives me a hug then leaves. So my question for anyone that has some advice is what do you think is going on here? I still love her and definitly would like to try and see if we can make things work out. She says she loves me too. i guess im kinda confused because i dont get how we could have this good sex and have a great time for 2 days and she kinda disses me at the end.
0hpenelope Posted August 19, 2008 Posted August 19, 2008 .... Then when we go home i ask her if we can talk for a sec and she is says we dont have anything to talk about and that last night was a mistake. I ask if i could call her and she says if i want to talk i will call you. She walks out the front door to leave w/o saying goodbye so i walk out side and yell goodbye to her. She then turns around and gives me a hug then leaves. So my question for anyone that has some advice is what do you think is going on here? i guess im kinda confused because i dont get how we could have this good sex and have a great time for 2 days and she kinda disses me at the end. How does being used feel, hm? It's not pleasant at all, I would say. I still love her and definitly would like to try and see if we can make things work out. She says she loves me too. Some users will say she's stringing you along (wareagle, I can totally see you typing that right now! ). Thing is, we can suggest you go NC but you're not going to agree with it because NC is something you don't want to do. You re-kindled the bond and it'll be hard to shake it off, even though NC will really help you with breaking the bond. She got her booty call. She's probably happy. Now what are you going to do for yourself?
CaliGuy Posted August 19, 2008 Posted August 19, 2008 No offense, but you can't tell when you've been used????
badbrit Posted August 19, 2008 Posted August 19, 2008 Damn guys, why such negativity. She still feels, still attracted and he jumped the gun which is understandable considering they just had sex and spent that time together. She gave an inch and you went for the whole nine yards. I promise had YOU been the one to act cool towards the end of the day, acted like it was no big deal that would have raised her desire level for you through the roof. I do not know this girl and her intentions but that does not matter, I know human nature and I swear, it became a booty call because you let it through being overeager. Had this been some chick that you just met, how would you have played it? Very cool I imagine, a lot cooler and had an air of take it or leave it and that is how it unfolds into a relationship. An ex is no different, act cool, indepedent, meet her needs, make her feel good and she will want more of that as long as she also feels unthreatened of you wanting too much of her. Basic human dynamics and this thread is yet another example of narrow minded bitter people who will spend their whole lives not having any clue on the true way to nurture love because they expect unrealistic things rather than being prepared to slowly apply the correct actions consistantly over a period of time.
0hpenelope Posted August 19, 2008 Posted August 19, 2008 Damn guys, why such negativity. She still feels, still attracted and he jumped the gun which is understandable considering they just had sex and spent that time together. She gave an inch and you went for the whole nine yards. I promise had YOU been the one to act cool towards the end of the day, acted like it was no big deal that would have raised her desire level for you through the roof. I do not know this girl and her intentions but that does not matter, I know human nature and I swear, it became a booty call because you let it through being overeager. Had this been some chick that you just met, how would you have played it? Very cool I imagine, a lot cooler and had an air of take it or leave it and that is how it unfolds into a relationship. An ex is no different, act cool, indepedent, meet her needs, make her feel good and she will want more of that as long as she also feels unthreatened of you wanting too much of her. Basic human dynamics and this thread is yet another example of narrow minded bitter people who will spend their whole lives not having any clue on the true way to nurture love because they expect unrealistic things rather than being prepared to slowly apply the correct actions consistantly over a period of time. That's another way of looking at things, too. I actually understand this. OP, your call.
nowhereman82 Posted August 19, 2008 Posted August 19, 2008 When I read the OP, my line of thinking was with badbrit. Give her her space, don't talk about the bad things of the past. Something could come of it, or you could just be a booty call.
nopainnogain Posted August 19, 2008 Posted August 19, 2008 Very strange. But badbrit had some badA$$ advice. I wish I woulda known that when I was in a similar situation
Author timmay Posted August 19, 2008 Author Posted August 19, 2008 ty all for your replys. Badbrit you are so right about she gave me an inch and i went for the whole nine yards. That night when i slept with her I honestly wasnt about to untill her best friend came in the room i was going to sleep in and said wtf go in her room and sleep with her. And my boy of course was supporting that idea. I pretty much have done everything wrong since we broke up so i took other peoples advice. Looks like i ****ed it up again ...... :[
nopainnogain Posted August 19, 2008 Posted August 19, 2008 And my boy of course was supporting that idea. :[ ........lol.........
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