Jump to content
While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

Its been a pretty long time since the breakup happened - ITs been a pretty long time since the worst of it was over. we broke up may 3 2007

 

over a year!

 

I am happy again, i am excited by my life and the decisions im making, im chasing my dreams all is good most of the time!

 

i recently read something that i agreed with.

 

Tell your story over and over in meticulous detail till it becomes so oversaid that it doesnt affect you. This is clearing your head space. everytime you say it, it makes a tiny bit of space in your mind. say it outloud and notice your reactions. eventually, you will be able to say it without feeling much at all.

 

There is a second part to it though

 

This part is very important.

You MUST fill your new space with new things to grow and love. New creations, new hobbies, lots of people discover new things when they are going through a devastation and it almost always is something creative. creativity forces you to be in the moment, and there is never anything wrong in present moment. it was always yesterday, or worrying about tmrw, or something that happened an hour ago.

If you don't fill your new space to grow and continue your loving energy in a different way you will feel sad and it would not have worked or set you up for the healing you intended on.

 

 

 

I still think about my ex most days. Not every day.

I still love my ex. but my perspectives and knowledge and awareness is different now. and it is those things that have the ability to HURT. Its not the love that hurts you.

 

People love others from afar everyday without feeling the gutrenching loss.

 

I was able to start myself on this journey with these perspectives about 6 months into coping. I always stated from the start that i would keep an open heart. i went through a time where i denied myself of anger and this prolonged some of the healing, but then i came to another time where i learnt that it was okay to express your anger - even physically (punching a few pillows does the trick along with yelling muffled by loud music!) is one of the only ways to release these feelings. and to be baggage free and open hearted i had to do this.

 

 

I can now see my side of the story i can see my ex's side of the story without hurting. i only start hurting when i fall into a moment of melancholy and this is living in the past there is no love for me in the past, and love doesnt hurt. so you put up statements all around your house, in your toilet, above your bed reminding you of this if you (naturally) forget.

there is never anything wrong in present moment, bring yourself back to now and create happiness by bringing gratitude into your life and into the now.

love doesnt and wont hurt me

I think another thing that really helped me was to know that i was on the right track no matter what i was feeling or doing or saying or knowing. Because everyone is in the exact moment they are meant to be in right now for better or worse because at that moment we are creating our destiny, learning precious wisdom, bringing gifts of patience and love into our lives. Tragedy brings passion so it was meant to happen.

 

I would love to chat with you guys about your time and try to ponder up answers of any questions that are floating around =) even if it the answer is - there is no answer! peace can be brought into it somehow

 

 

 

"When i was with you, all i had were fears and no dreams i chased you, now i have everything, and no fears and i chase my dreams."

 

-Jmina

×
×
  • Create New...