vonerik012 Posted August 17, 2008 Posted August 17, 2008 Depending on the guy , "status" might matter a lot. I might find the girl behind the fast-food register cute or sexy physically, but I know we're very unlikely to have anything in common, so I'm not going to "come on" to her. I'll be friendly, but nothing more. True, it's not because of her income (or lack of) but I'm going to assume that she's either very young, not too bright, lacks self-esteem, or some combination. Also, the ladies who wouldn't be interested in me because of what I drive? I'm glad. If they're that shallow, I don't want anything to do with them either.[/quote] http://blogs.cars.com/kickingtires/2008/08/fellas-women-re.html A survey by UK autoparts company Kwik-Fit found that 75% of women admitted to dating a guy primarily because they liked the car he drove. More shamefully, another 23% owned up to turning down a date because his car was lacking. What can this tell us about the state of male-female relationships? Aside from the fact that we're about as advanced as peacocks and their cool tail colors when it comes to attraction, it seems that single men should make a cool car a top priority. Admittedly, we don't normally go to autoparts suppliers for our sociological research, but we would also like to point out that the pendulum swings both ways on this: A surprising 40% of men said they judged their partners by the type of car they drive.
stoopid_guy Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 That survey really doesn't say that much. A lot will depend on the area, how the questions are worded, and the sample. For example, there's a difference between wanting the man have a relaible car and insisting he have a BMW. Also, its going to be a lot more critical to high-school kids than to 30-year-olds. Cars are also much more critical in suburbs or rural locations than in cities.
vonerik012 Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 Well I am not basing my entire hypothesis on that article.. It will be a deal breaker to a large percentage of women if you pick them up in a vehicle they feel they are embarrassed to be in. Women freely admit this.
Trialbyfire Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 Trial...sometimes I see people with fancy sports cars and watches....but chances are they don't own them....they are in debt to their eyeballs. That's why you take time to get to know them. There are plenty of men and women who put up appearances. This isn't just about financial debt, it's about the type of person they are. Fiscally irresponsible people aren't a good match for people that are. Also, in getting to know someone better, you can decide if what they're projecting is who they are. Pretty much everyone is on their best behaviour at first. When they relax and the bad behaviours start coming out, this is when you can decide if what you see is worthwhile, outweighs what you see on the negative side. Just be careful not to obsess about the negative. It's very easy to kill a budding relationship when you inflate the negative molehills to mountains.
Kamille Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 Women freely admit this. I do? Vonerik, I don't understand why you feel so strongly about people's dating criterias. I'm going to assume you feel at an economic disadvantage on the dating market. I believe, however, that you are projecting your own insecurities on a whole gender. Again, sure, some women care what car you drive or that you have a job you're passionate about. Others don't.
UglyBetty Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 You know I was all fired up to say something...but now I'm just having more fun reading...continue. haha.
vonerik012 Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 You would be ASSuming incorrectly. Anyway, all I said was if you drive a certain car,or type of car, you have a much wider range of women to choose from, as more would be willing to date you. Or even throwing themselves at you. That is not a false statement. I grew up with a guy who could never even get a girlfriend until he was 28. What changed his luck? His father died and left him over 1 million dollars. He bought a boat, sports car, and a Hummer. So now he is dating a Professional football cheerleader, a model, and another woman who never gave him the time of day before , who are all fighting for him. They want to have his children and get married..
Kamille Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 Why does it bother you so much that some women are like this though? That's what I don't get. Is it affecting your life in any way? ps: and thanks. I do have a nice ass.
vonerik012 Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 That's what this thread is about.. It doesn't bother me at all. It is an observation. I know this concept might be foreign to you as you live in eastern Canada. I never realized it as much until I moved to a bigger city. Maybe because I lived through the transformation of being a struggling working student to a better financial position I am more keen to it.
Kamille Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 That's what this thread is about.. It doesn't bother me at all. It is an observation. I know this concept might be foreign to you as you live in eastern Canada. I never realized it as much until I moved to a bigger city. Maybe because I lived through the transformation of being a struggling working student to a better financial position I am more keen to it. I've also lived in Paris and Toronto and have yet to understand the basis for your keen observations. Let's agree to disagree, yet again, and have this conversation all over again tomorow.
vonerik012 Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 Paris and Toronto is not the USA. You barely even need a car in Paris. I have no idea how a woman who lives in Eastern Canada can debate this with a man who sees ands hears this every single day. It is common sense. Ask 1000 American men if having a Ferrari, or Mercedes will help them in dating, as opposed to a chevy cavalier.. You would get 1000 affirmative answers.
almost famous Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 You can't generalize and say 'men.' Not all men are the same person, lol. Actually men AND women should care how much debt their partner has. Of course this is going to be something which comes up later in the serious stage of relationship. Well the difference is men will date you if you have debt, or no job, or a "non status" career. Men won't leave you if you lose your job. Men don't care if you drive a Cavalier or a Mercedes. If you rent a shoe box apartment or own a high rise condo. Your desirability is not based on what you can do for us financially. And please, do not even debate this...
almost famous Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 You would be ASSuming incorrectly. Anyway, all I said was if you drive a certain car,or type of car, you have a much wider range of women to choose from, as more would be willing to date you. Or even throwing themselves at you. That is not a false statement. I grew up with a guy who could never even get a girlfriend until he was 28. What changed his luck? His father died and left him over 1 million dollars. He bought a boat, sports car, and a Hummer. So now he is dating a Professional football cheerleader, a model, and another woman who never gave him the time of day before , who are all fighting for him. They want to have his children and get married.. He'd better watch it so he doesn't squander it all away.
stoopid_guy Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 Face it folks, there will always be people who aren't interested in you for some reason. You're too fat. You're to thin. You don't drive a "cool" car. You're too old. You're too young. You're too stupid. You're too intelectual. You're too dark. You're too fair. You're too boring. You're too unpredictable. You're married. Stop worrying about it, or when you do meet the right person, they'll think you're too insecure. Seriously, find someone who appreciates you as you are. Maybe it won't be a supermodel or a millionaire, but a sweet, honest person who enjoys being around you.
Kamille Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 Paris and Toronto is not the USA. You barely even need a car in Paris. I have no idea how a woman who lives in Eastern Canada can debate this with a man who sees ands hears this every single day. It is common sense. Ask 1000 American men if having a Ferrari, or Mercedes will help them in dating, as opposed to a chevy cavalier.. You would get 1000 affirmative answers. Are you now saying it's Americans who have a problem? Would I be dazzled if some guy was driving some kind of eco-jeep? Honestly, yes - again not because it means he has cash, but because it means we likely share core values (enviromentalism and being outdoorsy). If I were into bling, I might think a Ferarri is a bonus (and yes some people are into bling, the guy who drives the Ferrari for instance). My last bf however didn't have a driver's license. He held a job he was passionate about however and I liked that. There was a point where his job was compromised and it didn't phase me because I knew we shared the same core beliefs: he wasn't going to let a little setback get to him and we would be there for each other no matter what (his getting a promotions that would have involved an LDR for us is eventually what broke us up...). Face it folks, there will always be people who aren't interested in you for some reason. You're too fat. You're to thin. You don't drive a "cool" car. You're too old. You're too young. You're too stupid. You're too intelectual. You're too dark. You're too fair. You're too boring. You're too unpredictable. You're married. Stop worrying about it, or when you do meet the right person, they'll think you're too insecure. Seriously, find someone who appreciates you as you are. Maybe it won't be a supermodel or a millionaire, but a sweet, honest person who enjoys being around you. Well said Stoop G!
D-Jam Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 In 2001, when I was let go from a dotcom, I struggled to make ends meet til I had to give up in 2002 and move back home to regroup and rebuild my life. I remember at the time my current RL fell apart, I think partly because I was so depressed about the state of the economy, but also because my mid-20s girlfriend at the time didn't want to come over to a late-20s guy's parents house to hang out. I remember while I spent five years rebuilding my life and saving up a down payment for a condo. Those were rough times too. I had loads of women who had crappy jobs or no jobs even turning me away, all thinking because they were women that they were entitled to some yuppie who has a nice paycheck, condo, and expensive car. Funny how many of those same women more or less got constantly played by the yuppies they chased...so they were more their lay for the week as opposed to potential girlfriend. I'm not overly sore though. I understand how I appeared to those women compared to what they were raised to pursue. I don't feel sorry for them that they were pumped and dumped by these guys, but I understood why I wasn't what they wanted...despite that at the time I did have a good job again and had goals. The experience taught me to hold women to the same standards they held me to. Today I'm dating a pretty girl from Europe. She's a dental assistant and has been accepted to two dental schools. Her career isn't what drew me to her as much as her brains, taste, and down-to-Earth nature. I treat her very well and she appreciates it, as well as not expecting me to take her to expensive restaurants and such. The women who turned me away are all desperate and a mess trying to find a husband before they hit their mid-30s. However, they still haven't built their lives and wonder why men see them as a red flag instead of a potential wife. Karma's a bitch. In the end, people need to more see what POTENTIAL there is in a person over where they stand now. If this girl I'm dating were living with relatives, not working, but going to school, I'd still date her. If she was out of work, down on her luck, but working on getting a good job again and her career back on track, I'd date her. If she skipped school, works crap jobs, lives in a crappy place or on credit cards or with her parents, and is only looking for some guy to marry and support her, I'd walk. Women need to do the same. Walk on the guys who show no potential for a FUTURE WITH YOU and stay with the ones who have goals, plans, and are working on them. I use "future with you" as a means to remind women that just because a guy is successful doesn't mean he's going to get married and have a family...and they should make sure he's on the same page with her. Same goes for guys.
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