Touche Posted August 15, 2008 Posted August 15, 2008 what i want to know is... what was that guy so mad about that he would have thought to even have the need to approach CG? Very good question, Sunny! We're back to this concept of NC again now aren't we? Isn't this ex this guy's fiancee'? Well, maybe not. Maybe he's just her b/f. I thought you once said they were engaged to be married though. But still...what is CG doing having a "long talk" with her? And was this over lunch or over the phone or at his apartment? What was the setting. And more importantly, did they touch? Because you're supposed to be practicing NC, right? So many questions and so few answers. Lishy...who's the "tard" here? I'm so confused. (Remember I was dropped on my head as a baby.)
Lishy Posted August 15, 2008 Posted August 15, 2008 I think the guy coming up to CG made himself look a complete fool. This whole story is madness!!!!!!!!! The girl and the guy are so very immature, but I think the girl is 22 so maybe the guy is young too so that would explain why. The fact that CG is 39 would make her even more immature. So she talks to CG for hours, asks him not to tell anyone ... he agrees and then she goes and tells her new boyfriend? ... Nursery school stuff! Touche, you CAN touch when practising contact it is rule 42.7 in the NC rulebook! There can be no such thing as NC when you work together, I do not envy CG's position and hopefully she moves job soon
Touche Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 Rule 42.7? I must have missed that one. They work together? Ok, I must have missed the memo on that one. Wow, this is so complicated. I didn't think they worked together. And I didn't think she was that young either. Ok and this part makes me think my mom must have dropped me really hard: you CAN touch when practising contact it is rule 42.7 in the NC rulebook! How can you "practice contact" while following NO CONTACT's rules? Are you saying that there's a specific rule that dictates that you can still be technically in NC while still having contact? And as long as you don't brush up with them or touch them in any way? I guess it must apply only to people named "CaliGuy" right? Wow, this is really all over my little head.
2sunny Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 let's not make assumptions. we should wait until CG clarifies a few things.
Touche Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 let's not make assumptions. we should wait until CG clarifies a few things. You're really right, Sunny. We should wait. I'm sitting here waiting. But while I'm waiting I'm thinking that maybe CG needs to write an updated guide maybe. The other guide is outdated now I think. I mean things have changed now. It's just like those old science and history textbooks in school. Don't they update those every so often? Same here. CG's NC guide is very outdated now. He needs to add some new chapters. Like: 1. "How To Get Yourself To The Hospital with Broken Arms." 2. How To Move The Ex Into a More Private Cubicle Without Creating a Scene When He Invariably Confronts You at Work. 3. How to Force Common Sense Into the Ex's SO While Still Being Mature About It. 4. How to Not Back Down for Anyone. 5. How To Walk Away Laughing At It All.(Or at least put on a good act that you're laughing.) And finally, the most important chapter of the new updated guide: 6. How to maintain NC while still maintaining constant contact.
Author CaliGuy Posted August 16, 2008 Author Posted August 16, 2008 Laughing about it is the only thing that you can do. Did he come up to your desk like a Barney badas$ with his shoulders all up in the air? Dude if you can't laugh at something as "high school" as that, what can you laugh at?! He stopped laughing when, as we were leaving I told him "Oh yeah, you might want to tell your girlfriend to stop stalking me on my web site...." with a big smile on my face. He didn't think it was funny. I sure did Whats even funnier is I bet that he told all his buddies that he went and took care of business and told CG whats up. LOL. Dude, he's fat and out of shape. He's probably never been in a fight his entire life. Personally, I think a little chest butting would've done you both some good Maybe, but I didn't think she was worth fighting for nor losing my job over. haha. What a wanker. That he is. And insecure. If I had been in that situation I would have asked my girlfriend what she told him. I would have said, confidently, if you want him - GO! At the very least if she asked me to talk to him I would have asked him to step outside and take a walk with me and done it maturely. I would never make a scene at the office. Like I said, that is High School stuff little boys do, not men. The pushing at work I would say assault. It would have been more fun to see him make a scene. Oh well... quite interesting to see that guy doing what he is doing. His push was weak and half-hearted. If I had to tell HR that was assault, I deserve to be laughed at. Is it really worth the risk? How many arms do you have anyway? If you mess around with fire... well, I don't remember the rest, but just be careful. Something about burning or what not
Author CaliGuy Posted August 16, 2008 Author Posted August 16, 2008 Oh and CG, just curious about this: How long has it been since you two broke up anyway? You're still having "long talks?":confused: Weren't you the one around here who "wrote the book" on NC? What does NC mean? No physical contact? ('Cause I know you don't like being touched.) So you can still talk to each other but you can't touch each other? Is that what NC means? I'm so confused about this stuff. Can you explain please? Ok the web site visits were bothering me so I told her to stop. Then she got angry saying that I cut her out of my life. Then we got into a big discussion over the whole breakup and told each other how we felt, blah blah blah. Neither of us had closure in a way so that's what I was trying to get. What I didn't expect was her to tell him about the entire conversation. I got the answers I wanted, she got her answers and I thought it was done. touche' the conversation may have been about him not wanting her checking out his web page anymore. she was being kind of stalkerish... Yes she was and of course, she never told him that. But hey I figured since he was being an a$$ that was a good time to notify him of the visits. I'm sure the two of them will have a nice conversation about the web site stalking tonight. I am laughing out like like a freak hahhahhaha:lmao: Oh CG that is just so lame on his behalf! What a wankpot! She has got herself a real catch lol ..... he sounds very mature You know, she never acted this immature when we were dating. Now she's acting very much her age. That or, well, I was ignoring it when we were dating. lol. Sometimes you have to break NC to get some answers. Once you've received the answers, you can move on a lot faster. I'm a little disappointed with certain members who criticize others for being critical, then feel it's acceptable to do the same. Hmmm... Glad to hear that the situation was nullified without any physical violence. Like I said, I am not perfect. But things came to a head and it's what I needed to do to get some things off my chest, say my peace and move on. It's done and over with as far as I am concerned. Now if they have issues about this deal, that's their problem, not mine. He was upset because CG spoke to his girlfriend about the website matter ... I am getting a picture in my head of him puffing his chest out, pushing CG back into his seat to give him a telling off hahhahaha What a tard! Yeah that was what started the whole thing, really. But she never told him that part. She just told him that I got some things off my chest about the relationship and how things went down, how I felt about the situation and that I needed answers. By the time I was done with him -- HE was apologizing to me. No kidding. I think the guy coming up to CG made himself look a complete fool. This whole story is madness!!!!!!!!! The girl and the guy are so very immature, but I think the girl is 22 so maybe the guy is young too so that would explain why. The fact that CG is 39 would make her even more immature. So she talks to CG for hours, asks him not to tell anyone ... he agrees and then she goes and tells her new boyfriend? ... Nursery school stuff! Touche, you CAN touch when practising contact it is rule 42.7 in the NC rulebook! There can be no such thing as NC when you work together, I do not envy CG's position and hopefully she moves job soon Yeah she is a clerk. She hates her job, walks around socializing all day and cackle-laughs so much that her co-workers can hardly stand it. I am sure she'll find another job soon. Her supervisor told me today (he knows nothing about us) that he was going to talk to his boss about her because everyone is complaining. lol. I doubt she'll be there much longer. You're really right, Sunny. We should wait. I'm sitting here waiting. But while I'm waiting I'm thinking that maybe CG needs to write an updated guide maybe. The other guide is outdated now I think. I mean things have changed now. It's just like those old science and history textbooks in school. Don't they update those every so often? Same here. CG's NC guide is very outdated now. He needs to add some new chapters. Like: 1. "How To Get Yourself To The Hospital with Broken Arms." 2. How To Move The Ex Into a More Private Cubicle Without Creating a Scene When He Invariably Confronts You at Work. 3. How to Force Common Sense Into the Ex's SO While Still Being Mature About It. 4. How to Not Back Down for Anyone. 5. How To Walk Away Laughing At It All.(Or at least put on a good act that you're laughing.) And finally, the most important chapter of the new updated guide: 6. How to maintain NC while still maintaining constant contact. It wasn't constant contact. I hadn't talked to her in almost three months. Not one peep. But the website visits were bothering me so I did something about it. Then I got some other things off my chest. If you don't believe I laughed about it, so be it.
ioncebelieved Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 Can you say your ex's new man is an ass clown????? Not to mention in my state he committed simple battery on you by putting his dick beaters on ya!!! Really not a great idea to mix love and work, you know better than that!! But I will agree sometimes, we just have to do it!! I am guilty of it and it was pretty messy too.
Touche Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 Ok the web site visits were bothering me so I told her to stop. Then she got angry saying that I cut her out of my life. Then we got into a big discussion over the whole breakup and told each other how we felt, blah blah blah. Neither of us had closure in a way so that's what I was trying to get. What I didn't expect was her to tell him about the entire conversation. I got the answers I wanted, she got her answers and I thought it was done. Yes she was and of course, she never told him that. But hey I figured since he was being an a$$ that was a good time to notify him of the visits. I'm sure the two of them will have a nice conversation about the web site stalking tonight. You know, she never acted this immature when we were dating. Now she's acting very much her age. That or, well, I was ignoring it when we were dating. lol. Like I said, I am not perfect. But things came to a head and it's what I needed to do to get some things off my chest, say my peace and move on. It's done and over with as far as I am concerned. Now if they have issues about this deal, that's their problem, not mine. Yeah that was what started the whole thing, really. But she never told him that part. She just told him that I got some things off my chest about the relationship and how things went down, how I felt about the situation and that I needed answers. By the time I was done with him -- HE was apologizing to me. No kidding. Yeah she is a clerk. She hates her job, walks around socializing all day and cackle-laughs so much that her co-workers can hardly stand it. I am sure she'll find another job soon. Her supervisor told me today (he knows nothing about us) that he was going to talk to his boss about her because everyone is complaining. lol. I doubt she'll be there much longer. It wasn't constant contact. I hadn't talked to her in almost three months. Not one peep. But the website visits were bothering me so I did something about it. Then I got some other things off my chest. If you don't believe I laughed about it, so be it. Really? Not a "peep?" Hmmm...
Author CaliGuy Posted August 16, 2008 Author Posted August 16, 2008 Can you say your ex's new man is an ass clown????? Not to mention in my state he committed simple battery on you by putting his dick beaters on ya!!! Really not a great idea to mix love and work, you know better than that!! But I will agree sometimes, we just have to do it!! I am guilty of it and it was pretty messy too. I just think that showed utter insecurity on his part. And if our conversations bothered her that much she should have just said so instead of whining to him about it. I have never really had an office romance before this one and now I know why people say "stay away from them..."
Author CaliGuy Posted August 16, 2008 Author Posted August 16, 2008 Really? Not a "peep?" Hmmm... Really, not one peep. Don't you remember the thread I started about her saying "hello" to me in the break room and I ignored her? When I say "not one peep" I mean it. I had said nothing to her since the break up.
whichwayisup Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 What I didn't expect was her to tell him about the entire conversation I know you don't want to hear this, but it is a good thing she told him the entire conversation. I'm just surprised you expected her NOT to, even though you two agreed to keep the conversation between the two of you - She probably felt weird not telling him.
Touche Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 Really, not one peep. Don't you remember the thread I started about her saying "hello" to me in the break room and I ignored her? When I say "not one peep" I mean it. I had said nothing to her since the break up. Can you say "peep" again? And I know when you say not one "peep" you really mean it by golly!
2sunny Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 I know you don't want to hear this, but it is a good thing she told him the entire conversation. I'm just surprised you expected her NOT to, even though you two agreed to keep the conversation between the two of you - She probably felt weird not telling him. well if she didn't intend to keep it a secret - then she should have said so when CG talked with her. we all know how productive it was for her to tell... i hate it when people don't keep things private... never trust them again.
Art_Critic Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 You do realize that if you had just said Hi to her in the breakroom a few weeks ago that all of this drama would have never happened ?
Touche Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 You do realize that if you had just said Hi to her in the breakroom a few weeks ago that all of this drama would have never happened ? But see that shows that you don't know how this NC stuff works. You have to first not say a "peep" for months and then have a long talk about not saying a peep and why you haven't said a peep. If you don't do the above then it doesn't count as NC.
Author CaliGuy Posted August 16, 2008 Author Posted August 16, 2008 You do realize that if you had just said Hi to her in the breakroom a few weeks ago that all of this drama would have never happened ? Probably not but at the time, I didn't want to talk to her. You've been right most of the time so hats off to you I should listen to you more.
Author CaliGuy Posted August 16, 2008 Author Posted August 16, 2008 well if she didn't intend to keep it a secret - then she should have said so when CG talked with her. we all know how productive it was for her to tell... i hate it when people don't keep things private... never trust them again. We agreed to keep the conversation private between us. Apparently, I was the only one willing to hold up my end of the bargain so I felt that, since she wasn't keeping our conversation a secret, I wouldn't keep her web site stalking a secret from her new boyfriend. Especially since he had the audacity to confront me in my cube. LOL. Like I said, at the end of the conversation, HE was apologizing to me.
confused11 Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 wow....I'm lmao reminiscing about a situation where I left feeling as you did. When things like this happen it kinda makes you think "wtf was I thinking." "He stopped laughing when, as we were leaving I told him "Oh yeah, you might want to tell your girlfriend to stop stalking me on my web site...." with a big smile on my face." <-----that is so priceless!
xpaperxcutx Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 CG what does that tell you about office romances? You just can't tap them no matter how much you want to And your office needs to do something about their security if just anyone can walk up to your cubicle.
Author CaliGuy Posted August 16, 2008 Author Posted August 16, 2008 CG what does that tell you about office romances? You just can't tap them no matter how much you want to Ah well. She was 22 and had a strong interest in me and then all the sudden some guy makes her laugh once and I'm yesterday's news. That's one of the bad things about dating someone much younger. And your office needs to do something about their security if just anyone can walk up to your cubicle. Nah him and I work on the same floor, just opposite sides. We actually used to chat a tad before he switched departments. He's not a bad guy, really. Just misguided in his approach to resolving issues. He'll learn.
jerbear Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 Hey CG, I can use this as an learning experience, well to reinforce it. Don't mix work and pleasures. I was about to talk to the woman in the blue dress.
Touche Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 Hey CG, I can use this as an learning experience, well to reinforce it. Don't mix work and pleasures. I was about to talk to the woman in the blue dress. You mean the devil in the blue dress, don't you?
climbergirl Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 But see that shows that you don't know how this NC stuff works. You have to first not say a "peep" for months and then have a long talk about not saying a peep and why you haven't said a peep. If you don't do the above then it doesn't count as NC. OMG. I almost peeped my pants.
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