stuck bad Posted August 15, 2008 Posted August 15, 2008 I have fallen in love with a married woman; she does not have any kids and is willing to leave her husband. Where as I am married as well but have a 2 year old kid with her and also 2 kids from a previous marriage. My wife and I don't get along well, she is not working and since she is a new immigrant her English is not too good, we are Chinese by the way. In simple words she is not a smart person and will have a hard time if I leave her. I have a fairly good job and support the family. When I was recently divorced and very depressed when my family introduced my wife to me and I went for it. I don’t think I ever loved her. I truly know I will never be happy living with my wife because of the many differences we have, I don’t talk to her much now and she knows something is bothering me and is trying to be nice as to being stubborn and hot tempered like before. Then, 4 years back I meet this woman and since then we are madly in love and the thought of breaking up scares us to a point of suicide. We feel like we are soul mates. Her husband now wants a kid but she does not want to have his kid. This is causing lots of tears and pressure on us as we have to do something quick. I am a new member here and would like lots and lots of advice, please help. pn
soda Posted August 15, 2008 Posted August 15, 2008 I have fallen in love with a married woman; she does not have any kids and is willing to leave her husband. Where as I am married as well but have a 2 year old kid with her and also 2 kids from a previous marriage. My wife and I don't get along well, she is not working and since she is a new immigrant her English is not too good, we are Chinese by the way. In simple words she is not a smart person and will have a hard time if I leave her. I have a fairly good job and support the family. When I was recently divorced and very depressed when my family introduced my wife to me and I went for it. I don’t think I ever loved her. I truly know I will never be happy living with my wife because of the many differences we have, I don’t talk to her much now and she knows something is bothering me and is trying to be nice as to being stubborn and hot tempered like before. Then, 4 years back I meet this woman and since then we are madly in love and the thought of breaking up scares us to a point of suicide. We feel like we are soul mates. Her husband now wants a kid but she does not want to have his kid. This is causing lots of tears and pressure on us as we have to do something quick. I am a new member here and would like lots and lots of advice, please help. pn Ask yourself whether you'd be happy having this married woman do the same thing to you a few years down the road. She's indicated her willingness to do so once. If she's willing to do this now, what will she do to you when she meets someone else who is also her "soulmate" few years from now? Since you don't love your wife, your marriage probably won't make it. However, you owe your wife as much as to not mess around before you give her the freedom of not suffering through living with a cheater (you.) Work on your marriage, or end it. Cheating is for selfish cowards who will do neither.
Gunny376 Posted August 15, 2008 Posted August 15, 2008 Ask yourself whether you'd be happy having this married woman do the same thing to you a few years down the road. She's indicated her willingness to do so once. If she's willing to do this now, what will she do to you when she meets someone else who is also her "soulmate" few years from now? Since you don't love your wife, your marriage probably won't make it. However, you owe your wife as much as to not mess around before you give her the freedom of not suffering through living with a cheater (you.) Work on your marriage, or end it. Cheating is for selfish cowards who will do neither. What's that you say Tell it again! Don't be shy! Stand up and testify! Why would you want to get with a woman that's prefectly willing to cheat on her current husband? Why would you want to get with a woman that is prefectlly willing to cheat on her husband! Once a cheater? Always a cheater! If she'll cheat on him? She'll cheat on you! Just that plain! Just that freaking simple!
Sum1'sGot2RepThe530 Posted August 15, 2008 Posted August 15, 2008 Did the guy change his story? I didn't see where it said she was willing to cheat on her current husband with this guy, it said she was willing to leave her husband for him...
dgiirl Posted August 15, 2008 Posted August 15, 2008 Did the guy change his story? I didn't see where it said she was willing to cheat on her current husband with this guy' date=' it said she was willing to leave her husband for him...[/quote'] He said they fell in love 4 years ago. I dont know what your definition of cheating is, but if a someone gives their heart to someone else who is not their spouse for 4 years, then they are taking energy, dedication and love away from their marriage. To me, that is cheating the marriage.
Sum1'sGot2RepThe530 Posted August 17, 2008 Posted August 17, 2008 He said they fell in love 4 years ago. I dont know what your definition of cheating is, but if a someone gives their heart to someone else who is not their spouse for 4 years, then they are taking energy, dedication and love away from their marriage. To me, that is cheating the marriage. Fair enough.
TrustInYourself Posted August 17, 2008 Posted August 17, 2008 This is the problem with divorce. It invalidates marriage. It makes marriage expendable.. Grow up. If you have kids, start taking responsibility for your life and the impact your decision has on them. Soulmates...wow. I would say chemicals in your brain are creating this feeling. Mature love has nothing to do with these chemicals. Think rationally for a moment. Get your marriage back on track. Why even bother getting married if you are so willing to go through wives like iPods.
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