niceguy27 Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 Hello all...its been a long time since I have posted on here about my split with my ex. We have been apart for about a year now. We kept in very casual contact during this time. She and I have both dated some other people. My backstory is long but needless to say, I see that we both needed to spend some time apart to grow some. So, skip forward to last night. She texts me and wants to meet up for a drink. We get together and and just like the first time we met, we talked and laughed, and had a great time. Even after all this time we can still just pick back up and have a good time. Anyway, end of the night comes, we go back to her place to play cards. On the way home she asks me to hold her hand. I laughed and told her no. A few minutes later she reaches over and grabs my hand. So we start to talk about us and how much fun we used to have. Back at her house we go in and she looks at me and asks if I want to kiss her. I laugh again and she asks again. So one thing leads to another and we ended up all over the house. It was pretty amazing to say the least. Now, we never once slept together after we broke up. It was something neither of us were willing to do to each other. So last night completely blew me away. It was passionate, it was hot, and it was fun. A little bit of it all. I got up and left early this morning after we snuggled the rest of the night. She kissed me on the forehead and I said bye. So here comes the million dollar question...What now?
pandagirl Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 Well, I would definitely call! But also not read anything into it. Are you interested in starting something back up with her? It sounds like after a year apart that you guys are cool with each other...but maybe she just wanted to relive the good ole times. Sigh. Sounded like fun!
nowhereman82 Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 Haha, goooooaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll Good stuff. Question though, know anything of her current history? She just dump someone? I would want to find that out and see if you are a quick rebound....if she hasn't seperated from someone recently then maybe things look good Definitely call though if you care. Girls can feel weird if you don't lol
Author niceguy27 Posted August 12, 2008 Author Posted August 12, 2008 I think she has been split with this most recent guy for a little while. A month maybe? We didnt talk about anything like that. But she did just recently meet a guy in the last couple weeks that apparently reminds her of me. lol. And yes, I would like to restart something with her if given a chance. She actually just called and told me how unexpected last night was and how much fun we had. Is this a chance for me to bring up us going out again?
pandagirl Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 I think it's too soon to bring up starting something up again. I'd just try to talk to her more and hang out with her more. Try to leave sex out of the equation for now, but still be flirty and act interested in her as more than a friend. It's about reconnecting right now.
nowhereman82 Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 I agree with pandagirl....patience and slowness are what is needed here. Best of luck, please keep us updated Looks like you're possibly getting what a lot of us here would like eventually.
WiseOne1 Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 Hello all...its been a long time since I have posted on here about my split with my ex. We have been apart for about a year now. We kept in very casual contact during this time. She and I have both dated some other people. My backstory is long but needless to say, I see that we both needed to spend some time apart to grow some. So, skip forward to last night. She texts me and wants to meet up for a drink. We get together and and just like the first time we met, we talked and laughed, and had a great time. Even after all this time we can still just pick back up and have a good time. Anyway, end of the night comes, we go back to her place to play cards. On the way home she asks me to hold her hand. I laughed and told her no. A few minutes later she reaches over and grabs my hand. So we start to talk about us and how much fun we used to have. Back at her house we go in and she looks at me and asks if I want to kiss her. I laugh again and she asks again. So one thing leads to another and we ended up all over the house. It was pretty amazing to say the least. Now, we never once slept together after we broke up. It was something neither of us were willing to do to each other. So last night completely blew me away. It was passionate, it was hot, and it was fun. A little bit of it all. I got up and left early this morning after we snuggled the rest of the night. She kissed me on the forehead and I said bye. So here comes the million dollar question...What now? Dude you rule! Im happy for you, heck most ex gfs wouldnt dare sleep with a ex bf, your golden, however I think you should just play it cool the next couple of weeks. I think you should let her do all the asking as far as the relationship stuff. But I think you should ask her on another date. Just chill and let everything play out, if she wants to give it another go at a relationship with you, well you would know, trust me. But until she brings it up, say nothing!!! BUT OMGGGGG, the part that she grabs your hand is tense, lucky you. Man your doing great, I like hearing stories like this, you have to give me the details one day. Like "nowhereman82" said your getting something that alot of us would love to get.
Author niceguy27 Posted August 12, 2008 Author Posted August 12, 2008 I'm kind of keeping my fingers crossed with that one I dreamed of this for a long long time and after all this time apart it just kind of happened. I have fixed some things over the past year (neediness, being too uptight) and have done a lot of self reflecting on what I really want. I stuck to my guns and left on amicable terms with her and maybe we will start to reconnect again. If not, then so be it. I told myself that when we first broke up but never really believed it till recently. Ill definitely keep you guys updated.
WiseOne1 Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 I'm kind of keeping my fingers crossed with that one I dreamed of this for a long long time and after all this time apart it just kind of happened. I have fixed some things over the past year (neediness, being too uptight) and have done a lot of self reflecting on what I really want. I stuck to my guns and left on amicable terms with her and maybe we will start to reconnect again. If not, then so be it. I told myself that when we first broke up but never really believed it till recently. Ill definitely keep you guys updated. Dude Im trying to get where you are, ya know with my ex gf. Your the new voice of of Love Shack. "Your the man, the part where you say "If Not Then So Be It" shows how we all should act. Life is to short no matter how much you love someone or what, dude things could only go up and up for you.
vivrantflo Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 In no way do I want to bring the mood down, but please tread lightly... I've been where you are... many times, and with the same chick. Only to have the rug pulled completely from under me when I least expected it. Women have the amazing ability to do a 180, and vanish like nothing happened... This does seem promising.. but go very, very slow, and guard your heart. Good luck
BurningRoses Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 I agree, walk softly and carry a big stick. Conversely yipppeee for you! You have a great attitude about it, and I'm pullin for ya!
pandagirl Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 Yes, just because you guys slept together, it doesn't mean anything -- yet. But it does mean she thinks you are hot and sexxy! Just stay in the present and enjoy the fun!
WiseOne1 Posted August 13, 2008 Posted August 13, 2008 True, it doesnt mean she wants to get back with him, it just means that shes attracted to him, which is still a great thing, because theres no way a ex is gonna get back with you if there not still attracted. But this does seem promising.
l0stMike Posted August 13, 2008 Posted August 13, 2008 Haha, goooooaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll Good stuff. Question though, know anything of her current history? She just dump someone? I would want to find that out and see if you are a quick rebound....if she hasn't seperated from someone recently then maybe things look good Definitely call though if you care. Girls can feel weird if you don't lol LOL. I can just hear the sirens going off as I read "goooaaaalllllll". I cracked up at that! I'd say this is a great thing to happen as long as it doesnt lead to anything bad. I think 95% percent of this forum would love to have some hot, passionate, primal f*cking with their ex.
Author niceguy27 Posted August 26, 2008 Author Posted August 26, 2008 Well, A few weeks have passed and I hate to be the bearer of bad news... We finally talked about what happened the other night. It takes her a while to be able to discuss stuff like this. Anyway, we did the small talk for a minute and then we got on the subject of that night. She says she vaguely remembers exact details although she remembers us hooking up and having all the familiar feelings come back. But alas, that was as far as it was taken. She had randomly met some guy a week or two earlier and apparently has hit if off with him pretty well. I asked her what she kept apologizing about that night and it was for hurting me when we first broke up. She said she cares for me still but it is time to move on. I asked her that since we have had some time apart and obviously still have some chemistry, is it worth giving it another shot?? You know, lead off casually and see what happens?? Nope. Maybe down the road but she seems really into this new guy and maybe its too big of a jump to give us a shot again. So all in all I guess I am ok with it. I didnt know if it was a one time thing (looks like it was) or if we would start something new again. Now I know. Do I still hold a special spot for her?? Oh yes. Would I give it a chance if given a shot down the road?? Yes. Until then, time to keep on truckin! Maybe her apologizing was her way of closure on her part?? Doesn't matter now. I have some closure also. I left us alone for the past year, tried new things, changed my ways back to ME, and gave it another shot with her. I know on my end it is time to move on completely. WHEWW!!! that was pretty emotional to put all that down on here. Its been awhile since I have touched these feelings again.
nowhereman82 Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 Well now you know you have tried and you can move on. Time to continue with NC. I REALLY question why this happened a year later. Her actions seem more like someone from a more recent break up. Sorry bro. Was cheering for you, guess we all have a little hope.
vivrantflo Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 I was cheering for you too man, cause I was in the same boat two months ago. Ex called me up after 8 months NC telling me that she loves me and wants me back... just to change her mind 2 weeks later. I don't know.. I guess exes feel they should validate themselves with old exes that want them back, before they move on to someone else. Yeah, it's selfish and it sucks, but what can we do? Close the door on these chicks, and never let them back into our lives again... thats what im doing at least.... Good luck
movingonandon Posted August 26, 2008 Posted August 26, 2008 I just read somewhere that regardless of what kind of break up it was, at some point (2-12 months), the person who initiated it, has some sort of second thoughts and to some extent wants to give it another shot, if possible. This usually leads to some intense 1 day/1 week interaction, after whith things burn and crash again. Perhaps this is a part of some grieving process on the side of whoever breaks up as well (even if you're the one ending a relationship, you can't just turn it off). So i guess the lesson is what pretty much everybody says - don't read too much into it, maybe sometimes this works, but most likely not. My own ex-girlfriend contacted me two months after the break-up with the i still love you crap, and if we were in the same city there's a good chance we'd have ended on the floor, but I know better...
Author niceguy27 Posted October 3, 2008 Author Posted October 3, 2008 So a little update... About a month after we hooked up (for the first time after we broke up a year ago) it happened again. I called her up randomly to ask her something about school. Later that night she called me back all upset about her mother and stuff. I asked if she wanted to meet up and talk. Simple right? Well, I meet her at her dads house and we all sit down and have a couple beers and hang out for a bit. He goes to bed and her and I play some cards. She then wants to go lay down on the couch. Well, one thing led to another and we ended up hooking up again. Now all during this time she has a new boyfriend (from what I gather is a pretty good guy and madly in love with her). Prior to all this she has always been a faithful person. Never one to cheat or fool around with ANY guy she was with. So from here who knows. I feel comfortable knowing that she still has something there for me but for now its just not meant to be anything more than it is now.
PWSX3 Posted October 4, 2008 Posted October 4, 2008 I am probably not the one to ask about this stuff but I would say she is just using you for comfort. My question to you is; do you really want to be with someone that is welling to cheat on her b/f? If she does it with him she would do it with you again. I really feel she has some issues that she needs to work out & she is just trying to avoid them.
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