CarDude2015 Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 Okay, I have a few questions about dating because I've met a great girl that I'd like to have a long term relationship with. It's actually going well and I haven't screwed up (not like the previous disaster...oy). I had some questions I have to ask because I don't want to screw this one up. We went to a movie together recently and it went very well. 1. When does the whole relationship discussion become appropriate enough to discuss within the stages of dating? After the first date? Second date? Once you've had sex? Kissed? When? Do I bring it up or is the lady supposed to bring it up? What if you want to go slow (I want to take things slow). When do you let the lady know? 2. When do you kiss her? After the first date? On the first date? On the second date? When is the most appropriate time? 3. When do you express your feelings? Do you let the lady do it first or is there a time/place when the guy is supposed to do so? Is the guy supposed to send a love letter or are things supposed to just "happen" in terms of kissing/sex first and then the guy sends a love letter or flowers or poetry or what? As you can tell I'm a little bit of a neophyte when it comes to this dating thing (yeah, I know...late 20s...ugh) but I'm slowly but surely getting the hang of it. BTW, I don't want to learn that stupid junk from those "Don Juan" DeAngelo BS sites just in case anyone gets that idea. I'm looking for the good things in dating that men normally do that will actually impress a lady. Any feedback from the ladies would be welcome as well. Thanks a bunch to all in advance.
Mako482 Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 Okay, I have a few questions about dating because I've met a great girl that I'd like to have a long term relationship with. It's actually going well and I haven't screwed up (not like the previous disaster...oy). I had some questions I have to ask because I don't want to screw this one up. We went to a movie together recently and it went very well. 1. When does the whole relationship discussion become appropriate enough to discuss within the stages of dating? After the first date? Second date? Once you've had sex? Kissed? When? Do I bring it up or is the lady supposed to bring it up? What if you want to go slow (I want to take things slow). When do you let the lady know? 2. When do you kiss her? After the first date? On the first date? On the second date? When is the most appropriate time? 3. When do you express your feelings? Do you let the lady do it first or is there a time/place when the guy is supposed to do so? Is the guy supposed to send a love letter or are things supposed to just "happen" in terms of kissing/sex first and then the guy sends a love letter or flowers or poetry or what? As you can tell I'm a little bit of a neophyte when it comes to this dating thing (yeah, I know...late 20s...ugh) but I'm slowly but surely getting the hang of it. BTW, I don't want to learn that stupid junk from those "Don Juan" DeAngelo BS sites just in case anyone gets that idea. I'm looking for the good things in dating that men normally do that will actually impress a lady. Any feedback from the ladies would be welcome as well. Thanks a bunch to all in advance. I'm sorry you've entered the world of dating, hope you like rollercoasters. The only advice I have for you is just keep dating her and don't mention any of that stuff to her. Play it all by ear man, you should be able to gauge from her physically if she is ready to kiss. Usually for me handholding, arms around each other etc.. seems to come first and then I know she is ready for a kiss. That is the easy part, the other stuff you can have her running for cover quick. I've found when you start showing too much interest women freak, I'm sure they can say the same about us. I've come to the conclusion it is all a guessing game based on you and who you are dating, even then when you think it is going well it doesn't mean it is. I'm pretty cynical about it, maybe I shouldn't be giving advice lol. Anyone else?
Author CarDude2015 Posted August 12, 2008 Author Posted August 12, 2008 But the "too much interest" part is totally the opposite of what has D-Lish smitten in this thread: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t160915/ So, yeah I'm definitely a bit confused on this. :confused:
sultry33 Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 hi op.. stop worrying you will be fine.. just ride the ride;) 1st kiss.. normally a quick kiss.. not full on snog unless they initate it.. me i find it a bit much if they do.. i like to lead.. dinner.. movie does not really matter.. you will know when time is right. discussing "the relationship" just go with the flow.. after about 3 dates you should know where your at.. if not ask expressing your feelings... erm wait for the lady.. us girls can get scared away if its too soon.. imo for me i like it casual.. fun.. to serious to i want to call them! if a guy is too keen im bored.. sorry but in my case its true. good luck and happy dating:love:
sultry33 Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 But the "too much interest" part is totally the opposite of what has D-Lish smitten in this thread: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t160915/ So, yeah I'm definitely a bit confused on this. :confused: different strokes for different folks... we are all different.. maybe start a thread.. too much interest.. or play it cool? whats the best? x
Mako482 Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 But the "too much interest" part is totally the opposite of what has D-Lish smitten in this thread: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t160915/ So, yeah I'm definitely a bit confused on this. :confused: Everyone's different friend, I can only give you my personal experience.
flc Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 Like everyone says just find some fun activities, dinner etc go out and see how things flow. You will know if she is having fun and if she is, go in for a kiss and if you get the cheek your still good. Let her know you had a good time and ask her if you can see her again before you let her go for the evening. That will let you know how it went for her. Don't even think of anything more than going out and having fun, if you are into each other the deeper discussions will come up later. As for all of the games I think you just have to go with your personality and the situation, if you spend time thinking about how you should act your not being natural and that is going to be a problem at some point.
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