DopestarObscene-x Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 Sorry, wasnt really sure where to post this one.... Okay, my friend of a few years was seeing a guy for a few months. She really liked him, but he treated her badly, constantly cheated on her and was just an idiot in general. They've been split a while now, say 8 months. I have been out on a few nights out recently and have bumped in to him. My friend was not with me. We had a drink and caught up, had a chat. Long story short, we ended up kissing. Following weekend, this Friday past, same thing happened. Straight away I thought that nothing serious would ever happen between us, at least nothing serious. I have heard from my friend what he can be like and I dont want to get involved with that...Im happy single anyway at the minute. Problem is, after the last time I kissed him I can feel myself starting to like him. I promised that I wouldnt because it would be too awkward between my friend and I. Either way now Im gonna have to tell my friend about what has happened, even though I really think its in everyones best interests to tell him where to go and why. I could be selfish and not tell her nothing, but some mutual friends have seen us, so I need to tell her before someone else does. I know straight off she's going to be really angry with me (a friend of ours is seeing a guy she just kissed once ages ago and she was far impressed at that) and this will probably put a wedge in our friendship. Do I tell her? How would I approach it? Ahhhh what a mess
Ariadne Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 Sorry, wasnt really sure where to post this one.... Okay, my friend of a few years was seeing a guy for a few months. She really liked him, but he treated her badly, constantly cheated on her and was just an idiot in general. They've been split a while now, say 8 months. I have been out on a few nights out recently and have bumped in to him. My friend was not with me. We had a drink and caught up, had a chat. Long story short, we ended up kissing. Following weekend, this Friday past, same thing happened. Straight away I thought that nothing serious would ever happen between us, at least nothing serious. I have heard from my friend what he can be like and I dont want to get involved with that...Im happy single anyway at the minute. Problem is, after the last time I kissed him I can feel myself starting to like him. I promised that I wouldnt because it would be too awkward between my friend and I. Either way now Im gonna have to tell my friend about what has happened, even though I really think its in everyones best interests to tell him where to go and why. I could be selfish and not tell her nothing, but some mutual friends have seen us, so I need to tell her before someone else does. I know straight off she's going to be really angry with me (a friend of ours is seeing a guy she just kissed once ages ago and she was far impressed at that) and this will probably put a wedge in our friendship. Do I tell her? How would I approach it? Ahhhh what a mess I would tell her, and if she doesn't like it, she sucks for friend anyway.
Nevermind Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 One question: you know he cheated, more than once, and treated your friend badly. What makes you think he is going to be different with you? To answer your question: You need to tell her. It's not a recent ex, so she should not be emotionally attached to him anymore. However, it will be awkward.
Author DopestarObscene-x Posted August 11, 2008 Author Posted August 11, 2008 I know he's not going to be any different with me, hence me not really wanting to get involved, even though I am starting to like him. I think I will tell her, and soon. He's hitting the same bar as us for a night out at the end of the month (his brother in law owns the place) so I just know he'll try it on with me and she'll find out everything, and I REALLY dont want her to find out like that! I feel like such a rubbish friend though, Ive never been anywhere near a friends ex in my life. I dont know what's got in to me!
Trimmer Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 ...he treated her badly, constantly cheated on her and was just an idiot in general. I know he's not going to be any different with me.... I dont know what's got in to me! So you are attracted to this guy, who you know would probably treat you badly, probably cheat on you if you were in a relationship, and even a hookup with him will damage a valued relationship with your friend. Have you ever really explored these self-destructive tendencies of yours?
Author DopestarObscene-x Posted August 11, 2008 Author Posted August 11, 2008 So you are attracted to this guy, who you know would probably treat you badly, probably cheat on you if you were in a relationship, and even a hookup with him will damage a valued relationship with your friend. Have you ever really explored these self-destructive tendencies of yours? Okay, that answer is probably a bit far fetched. I know Ive made a mistake, realise hes an idiot and I dont want to go there. I was drunk when I kissed him. I am by no means self destructive, thanks.
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