Flossy85 Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 6 months ago, my partner decided that he wanted to go on a working holiday to Japan for 2 years and he would be leaving in Feb 2009. I am still hurting over it because I feel he wants to end our relationship, when nothing has ever gone wrong for us. I have never cheated, he has never cheated, we "mesh" ( i suppose everyone knows what I mean, you feel so comfortable, its just...right) We have been together for over 5 years now, we have lived together for almost a year, have a cat and have been so happy. He has completed me and I thought it was going to last forever. He used to make me feel like a princess. So the last 6 months I have been hurting so badly. He has been silent to say whether or not he wants to stay together once he moves to Japan and it has left me so confused. Last night, I lost it. I cried and cried just wanting an answer, I am so sick of being sad. He finally opened up and pretty much said that he loves me but isn't "in love" with me anymore. He said that life goes on and he wants to see how it feels to be with another woman, an do different things with his life. I asked him if he wanted to break up then and there, but he said that there was "no need" to yet as he isnt moving for another 6 months or so. I am so confused.......I would do anything for him to stay with me, I don't care that he needs to find himself, travel etc, I just want to know that we can stay together. I do feel I'm the only one fighting for our relationship, and he just doesnt care. Today all I have done is cry,I don't even know where I stand anymore, he just will not tell me. why does he want to stay together just for now, even though he is only going to piss off to Japan and end it in february? He thinks that we can be happy, live together and get on with it but I can't. I have known about this for 6 months now, and every day it gets harder. He's my soulmate, I know he is, I want to help him but he's shutting me out and making me feel cold. I want my man back...... Does he love me? He says he does but I don't know if he is just saying to to avoid talking about the situation.
Billie63 Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 I'm really sorry that you are going through this. It's only fair that he moves out so that you are able to face up to the situation properly. You will not be able to grieve the relationship until he moves out. As long as you two are under the same roof, part of you will believe there is a chance. There may still be a chance of you two working out, but not this way. i think he's staying because it's convenient for him. I doubt he wants to find a short term apartment between now and Feb. You really should demand he move out immediately and give you a chance to get over him. If he moves out there is also a chance that he will see that he actually is "in love" with you and going abroad will lose its appeal. But even if that does not happen. You can not make someone want you or stay with you. Take some control now.
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