anotherother24 Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 I dont know exactly what I'm looking for here...maybe just a little feedback, maybe to here that what I'm feeling is atleast a little normal lol but...I figured it couldn't hurt to post. My ex broke up with me..almost a year ago. We never fought or anything, no problems at all...except that he was married. Yeah, small problem...lol but I'm still feeling really upset over the whole thing. I know the "affair" was wrong but it still doesn't help my feelings. We used to go out and hang out, so it wasn't just about sex or anything. So, when he started acting weird, towards the end of the affair, i guess, I got upset and told his wife about the affair. She already knew really but I confirmed it to her. I know, smooth move on my part! Needless to say, he wasn't very happy with me. So, we never really spoke again after that. I called him a couple times and apologized. Usually that only pretty much resulted in his wife calling me to say how happy they are and how much he hates me. So, for the most part, I haven't been that horrible to them. I haven't been able to stop thinking about him though, I just hate the way things ended, and that things ended at all really. To make things worse, this is basically my first relationship and I was a virgin. I think that is part of the problem! So, last weekend I got the bright idea that I should call him, of course things didn't go as planned. So I text messaged him telling him I just wanted to talk and how much he hurt me and crap. He said he was sorry but that's about it and that he didn't answer his phone because he didnt want to get in trouble. Then he told his wife I called and she was so happy of course! So long story short, I got in a fight with her and ended up sending her a picture of a card her husband sent me that said he loved me and crap. Then I ended up apologizing for the trouble *I* caused and she said it was okay and that she wasn't upset at all, that they were so happy and she just felt bad that I wasn't happy. Which, of course..made me feel so much better! So I sent him...a nice number of text messages telling him I loved him and I couldnt understand why he would do this to me...and alot of other embaressing things. Anyways, they blocked my number and now I feel like crap. Well, I felt like crap before but still...lol Has anyone else ever had an ex do this type of thing? I just don't want him to think I'm some crazy and hate me or something. Everyone says that it doesnt matter what he thinks...but it bugs me..lol I hate to have people not like me, and noones ever treated me this way before...I guess is why I'm having a hard time with it. I mean...I can see that he would be a little mad that I've caused problems with him and his wife...but shouldnt he also be able to understand that he made me promises and hurt me? Will he remember the happy times we had or just that I acted a littttttle bit crazy? lol and wtf do I do to erase this man from my head? It's been almost a year and I still feel hurt. I don't want to feel this way. It's just...so weird to have been so close with someone and for them to just act like you never mattered at all. I mean, he wouldnt even talk to me to give me a little bit of closure, that just seems mean to me. It makes me feel like he never gave a crap about me....which, I dont think is the truth. I understand he has his family to worry about but...it sucks! Also, his wife claims to be a few months pregnant...which makes me feel even better! I just feel like he's over there happy after cheating on his wife for a year...and she claims to be so happy...and I'm the miserable one here. Which, possibly I deserve...my mom says theres no way they are that happy after all the things that happened..but of course my mind can only imagine them living in paradise over there...lol Anyways, this is turning into a book....lets see what u all think...lol
wareagle Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 I think you should no be contacting a married man!!! That's what I think!!!!! Leave him alone!!! There are plenty of single men in this world why would you want to waste your time on a married man!! Haven't you caused his wife enough pain!!! Grow up move on!!! Get over it!!!!
tinke Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 you can understand him being a LITTLE mad because you caused trouble with him and his wife? Are you serious? You intentinally involved his wife into YOUR misery. First you were messing around with her husband, and yes, I know, he is to blame too (but, it is you who is writing), and then, you alert her to your activities together, and THEN, if that wasn't enough....you send a card from him? Was this a year later? What are you expecting? You knew he was married going into this, yes? Well, you know the pain you are feeling knowing he is with her? That is the same pain you caused his wife! Isn't pretty, huh? Where he is no saint by any means, let him be! He is reporting your contacts to her, does that sound like someone who wants to be with you?
Author anotherother24 Posted August 11, 2008 Author Posted August 11, 2008 I think you should no be contacting a married man!!! That's what I think!!!!! Leave him alone!!! There are plenty of single men in this world why would you want to waste your time on a married man!! Haven't you caused his wife enough pain!!! Grow up move on!!! Get over it!!!! Yeah thanks for stating the obvious, of course I know I shouldn't be contacting a married man. What I'm trying to figure is...how exactly do you get over it?
tinke Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 The thing is...you are STILL contacting a married man!
Author anotherother24 Posted August 11, 2008 Author Posted August 11, 2008 you can understand him being a LITTLE mad because you caused trouble with him and his wife? Are you serious? You intentinally involved his wife into YOUR misery. First you were messing around with her husband, and yes, I know, he is to blame too (but, it is you who is writing), and then, you alert her to your activities together, and THEN, if that wasn't enough....you send a card from him? Was this a year later? Yeah, it was a year later. Well, I "alerted" her to our activities about a year ago..but I texted her a picture of the card just recently, after a little bit of a fight with her. I know, it was wrong. She didn't seem at all upset though, I apologized to her, in the end. Which, doesn't make what I did any better but..you know.. What are you expecting? You knew he was married going into this, yes? Well, you know the pain you are feeling knowing he is with her? That is the same pain you caused his wife! Isn't pretty, huh? No it's not, it just sucks. I just feel like...Why doesnt HE get to feel any pain? He didn't lose anything and it doesn't seem fair. Where he is no saint by any means, let him be! He is reporting your contacts to her, does that sound like someone who wants to be with you No not exactly. I'm not saying he wants to be with me anymore. I'm saying that I still feel hurt and confused.
Author anotherother24 Posted August 11, 2008 Author Posted August 11, 2008 The thing is...you are STILL contacting a married man! Yeah, I just felt like I needed to say a few things. I don't plan on contacting him anymore though.
tinke Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 Yes he lost, also. By no means will he forget the guilt of his infidelity, not to mention the rebuilding of trust ahead of him. This is one that you will just have to force yourself to move forward.
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