Jeska00 Posted August 10, 2008 Posted August 10, 2008 What do you do when you feel like you are watching your relationship fall apart right in front of your eyes and there is nothing you can do to fix it. My boyfriend and I have had several fights recently with each one getting worse and worse. Last night he got mad and left me and didnt come home until 2am. When he got home I wanted to talk to him and his response was "if you start talking, I am just going to leave again, if you have something to say, write it down. Maybe I will respond." I feel like I compromise myself to make him happy and I am just making myself unhappy. I want to know why he hurts me, why would something that has been with a person for 4+ years just decided that he is not getting what he wants anymore. He is happy until something goes wrong. Then he kind of throws his hands up and kinda gives up. I know he says things when he gets mad and doesnt mean. I know he loves him, but I dont know how much more of this I can take. We are sitting in the living room on opposite ends and I wrote him like he told me to, but he isnt responding to me, and it hurts cause all I want is to talk to him, work it out and hold each other. We havent spoken all day and I dont think we will. any advise/suggestions on how to deal with this is welcome.
Author Jeska00 Posted August 10, 2008 Author Posted August 10, 2008 I know there are alot of typos on this entry, please excuse me. I am just a little upset and I didnt proof read
Art_Critic Posted August 10, 2008 Posted August 10, 2008 What are your fights about ?.. Are any of your fights exit fights ( besides last night ) or fights where breakups are talked about ? Are any of your fights low blow fights where either of you take low blows at the other instead of just arguing ?
Lizzie60 Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 What do you do when you feel like you are watching your relationship fall apart right in front of your eyes and there is nothing you can do to fix it. My boyfriend and I have had several fights recently with each one getting worse and worse. Last night he got mad and left me and didnt come home until 2am. When he got home I wanted to talk to him and his response was "if you start talking, I am just going to leave again, if you have something to say, write it down. Maybe I will respond." I feel like I compromise myself to make him happy and I am just making myself unhappy. I want to know why he hurts me, why would something that has been with a person for 4+ years just decided that he is not getting what he wants anymore. He is happy until something goes wrong. Then he kind of throws his hands up and kinda gives up. I know he says things when he gets mad and doesnt mean. I know he loves him, but I dont know how much more of this I can take. We are sitting in the living room on opposite ends and I wrote him like he told me to, but he isnt responding to me, and it hurts cause all I want is to talk to him, work it out and hold each other. We havent spoken all day and I dont think we will. any advise/suggestions on how to deal with this is welcome. If I were you I would write him alright.. a big huge sign on the door... 'PACK YOUR STUFF AND GET OUT'... he's a selfish sob.. move on.. otherwise you will ALWAYS be the one who will do 'summersaults' (sp) to please him and keep the relationship at peace.. Come on... take care of yourself.. cause he's obviously don't care about you..
LovehateLove Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 If I were you I would write him alright.. a big huge sign on the door... 'PACK YOUR STUFF AND GET OUT'... he's a selfish sob.. move on.. otherwise you will ALWAYS be the one who will do 'summersaults' (sp) to please him and keep the relationship at peace.. Come on... take care of yourself.. cause he's obviously don't care about you.. How anyone can gain such an insight to the problems this woman faces from such a vague post is beyond me. Misandry? Yes, I think so, Sherlock Holmes.
Author Jeska00 Posted August 11, 2008 Author Posted August 11, 2008 I know my entry was very vague, I was just very upset. Our fight are over stupid stuff. He did something a few months ago that made me distrust him but we agreed to work it out. That was the only exit fight where I left. He didnt cheat on me or anything and I dont want to give too much detail other than he was having a 3 week EA. Our arguements get out of control because he feels like if he shuts down and goes to sleep, they are over by the next day. That is not how I work and he refuses to do much else. Part of me says get out, while the other part says that we can work through this.
A.G.Doren Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 Your bf doesn't know how to deal with conflict in a healthy way. Walking out is probably the safest thing he knows how to do. Tell him that the problems needs to be solved and suggest counseling.
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